Is there always a dominant one? - Page 2 - Cat Forum : Cat Discussion Forums
LinkBack Thread Tools
post #11 of 31 (permalink) Old 04-20-2013, 10:53 PM
Cool Cat
Blakeney Green's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,098
Neither of my cats is clearly dominant over the other one, although I think Maisie may have the slight edge over Zephyr if it really came down to it. I have two males who are close in age.

The Boys: Maisie, Zephyr, and Cullen.
Blakeney Green is offline  
Sponsored Links
post #12 of 31 (permalink) Old 04-20-2013, 11:26 PM
Tom Cat
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Alabama Transplant
Posts: 352
I have 4 furballs, 2 girls and 2 boys. My 11yr old, Rambo, WAS the quietly assertive king. 7 yr. old Katy-Did deferred to his every wish. Never a squabble...just 2 separate individuals, the only link being me.
Then I really shook the household up by bringing "new blood" in the form of 6 wk old littermates, Samson and Delilah. When they were tiny, Katy-did was really hissy and bossy...but they ignored her. All of a sudden Samson was the same size as Katy and took over as Alpha...and don't question it! He does not look for trouble but if Katy tries to express her opinion he will not back down. They sit there and keep popping each other with their paws. Sometimes they start rolling around "fighting, lol". Katy is a loud mouth. She even makes a grunting sound when she jumps off the bed or whatever...always has. If she is laying beside me and I lean down and blow on her back, she yells. It's so funny. She yells about everything and tells me VERY long stories complete with inflections! Anyway, Katy always leaves any close encounter with Samson hissing and yelling all the way. So now Katie is third. Little Lilah is Ms. Submissive. She is just tiny compared to everyone else. But she doesn't mind. She still curls up with the bad-butt brother. They still groom each other and when Samson gets too rough...she walks off. Katy picks on her once in awhile, but she just scoots.
Cat Lover Lennie is offline  
post #13 of 31 (permalink) Old 04-21-2013, 12:21 AM
Jr. Cat
Tokkaebi's Avatar
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: MI, USA
Posts: 85
This is something that has been on my mind a lot ever since adopting my cats in July of 2012. They're now in their 9th month, and Biscuit my dilute tortie American Shorthair seems to be regularly dominant, though she's quickest and has the most energy of the three.

They're all from the same litter, but she's little compared to the other two and whose cerebellar hypoplasia wasn't ever as bad as the rest of them. They were the last 3 to be adopted, and I took Biscuit away from the other two first for 2 months, then took in her siblings Bella and Gandalf later, and they didn't even recognize each other,

Gandalf is the only boy and does not like to be picked up, nor scruffed; I do feel an alpha something about him, he's just normally pretty apathetic about things unless he hears a catnip shaker mouse. Or treat bag.

And then there's Bella. She started out very, very timid when she first came to live with me. So skittish, she'd run away if I merely got up from sitting, or if I walked near her. I'd have to turn my back to her, so she would feel comfortable enough to stay put as I walked beside her.

She was getting bullied by Biscuit fairly regularly, but I made sure Biscuit had proper prey to hunt and jump at with toys. Biscuit and Gandalf would play "at her," jump on her, and she'd just want to leave. Now she plays back and can hold her own. I also set Bella on top of their cat structure, I pet her specially, I speak to her a lot, and now she's quite vocal around me and much more confident about her own identity amongst the other cats. If she's at my feet, she'll mew to tell me she's there. She's still the cautious one, the smartest one, the most affectionate, and I'm always working to give her opportunities to come up out of the bushes, so to speak.

She has made a lot of progress and things are actually more equal between the three of them than I think is normal, but the way things are going make me very happy. Before, Bella wouldn't even go up to the collective dish to eat because the other two were there. I would have to pick her up and set her at it, sometimes even feed her by hand. Separate dishes didn't work either, I wanted to integrate the 3 of them together as a family again, so shutting them in different rooms didn't solve my problem. Eventually, she realized her place was with them and not underneath them.

Raising comfortable, confident cats really is the job of a loving parent.
Tokkaebi is offline  
Sponsored Links
post #14 of 31 (permalink) Old 04-21-2013, 07:19 AM
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 16
I have a similar problem. New kitten (male) approx 5.5 months old now, has been with me 6 weeks appears to be jealous of any attention I give to the long standing cat (female). The female is long - haired and a placid nature. The other is oriental and the total opposite. I know he's still young and they'll play chase etc but when it comes to her getting anywhere close to me, he barges in and shoos her off. He seems to be getting rougher each time and it seems rougher than simple play. Of course I don't tolerate it and tell him off and remove him from anywhere close to me. I'm hoping he'll calm a bit after neutering and as he gets older but given the size of him already, he's not going to be a small cat. Any further tips to stop him bullying would be most appreciated.
sam_pling is offline  
post #15 of 31 (permalink) Old 04-21-2013, 07:34 AM
Premier Cat
Marcia's Avatar
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
Posts: 9,142
Our Missy was certainly the dominate one until January. Her little teeny 5 pound self would boss around everyone, including 22 pound Jack......until Lacey showed up. Lacey is quiet but confident and will put Missy in her place with only a stare. She has those amazing wolf / Betty Davis style eyes. I had NEVER seen Missy back down to anyone until Lacey showed up!!

Cat owners' prayer: "Lord help me be the person my cat thinks I am"

Last edited by Marcia; 04-21-2013 at 07:37 AM.
Marcia is offline  
post #16 of 31 (permalink) Old 04-21-2013, 11:14 AM
Premier Cat
catloverami's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Cobourg, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 5,069
At 5.5 mos. his male hormones are starting to flow and he's ready to be neutered now. Yes his play will become rougher and more aggressive the longer you delay having him neutered. Early neutering at 2 lbs. of weight or 2mos. of age is becoming more common practice these days.

"There are no ordinary cats.";"Time spent with a cat is never wasted."~ Colette
"A loving cat can mend a wounded heart." ~ Unknown Author
Alkitotle aka "Alkee", "Lambie" (July 2/04 - Oct. 2/15) -- white Devon Rex
in avatar. "Always in my heart."
catloverami is offline  
post #17 of 31 (permalink) Old 04-21-2013, 12:19 PM
Premier Cat
MowMow's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Looney Bin
Posts: 10,872
Yeah, he should absolutely be neutered asap.

MowMow rules all of us with an iron paw. He even bosses me around constantly. He's slow to anger but when he

On numerous occasions, Book has staged a rebellion and tried to overthrow the current regime but each time he's been beaten back into submission. When it's all over and I come out of hiding, things are back to normal....
MowMow is offline  
post #18 of 31 (permalink) Old 04-21-2013, 08:37 PM
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 16
Yeah.. he'll be neutered in the next couple of weeks. The standard where I come from (UK) was always 6 months onwards and I think that is still standard where I live now (UAE). Rules may have changed in the 10 years plus since I had to take a male kitten for the op. Let's see how we get on a month or so after neutering.
sam_pling is offline  
post #19 of 31 (permalink) Old 04-22-2013, 04:03 PM
Cat Addict
Alpaca's Avatar
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,681
Yes I'd say so. I don't interfere in their hierarchy unless things get outta hand. The hierarchy needs to be reinforced from time to time as a reminder. It's just how cats are.

So if the female alpha roughhouses the larger male, I let them alone unless she gets vicious. Then I step in with a 'NO' and she takes off in a huff.
Alpaca is offline  
post #20 of 31 (permalink) Old 04-22-2013, 05:24 PM
Jr. Cat
svenden's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 89
I think we have a tendency to project our feelings onto our cats. Fanty constantly hordes my lap, and while I try not to let him, Mingo gives up so easily its hard to stop it. After years of this I've finally come to the conclusion that Mingo just isn't bothered much by it - clearly not as much as me. He's perfectly content to sit next to me as he is to hang out in my lap.

Whereas, if I were him, I'd be starting all kinds of trouble with Fanty! lol
svenden is offline  
Sponsored Links

Quick Reply

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Cat Forum : Cat Discussion Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:


Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome