I just need to let all of my emotions out because they have been building up for the past month and I haven't told anyone about it, so I think if I let them brood for any longer I am going to break. About a month ago, I adopted a 3 month old kitten I named Frankie from an animal shelter. Originally I didn't even want to get a kitten, I had been researching adult male cats online from various fosters that were apparently very affectionate. However, my mother, grandmother, and I (I'm a minor by the way) visited an animal shelter just to look at the animals, not to adopt. My mother and grandmother both saw this adorable little female kitten that they wanted to see. She was the sweetest thing, just wanted to be held and fell asleep in their arms. I was extremely skeptical, since I already had everything planned out for what kind of cat I wanted, but they reassured me that even though it was my choice, I couldn't go wrong with a kitten like her. Eventually, I caved in and fell in love with the little thing as well and we took her home that day.
Except we got completely snowed.
What we weren't told until after the fact was that she was spayed THE DAY BEFORE we saw her at the shelter, and was still under the effects of anesthesia. The next day, she was zipping about everywhere and no longer wanted to be held at all. She still gave head bonks if I held my hand out to her, but then she'd simply slide her body along my hand and then walk away. She tolerates pets but I can't really say that she asks for them. However, the one thing that I loved about her was that she loved to snuggle. In the afternoon, she'd hop up onto the bed when I was on my computer, snuggle up right next or on my lap, and fall asleep. But it's been a month and now it seems like she's stopped ALL affectionate gestures. She no longer snuggles, occasionally head bonks but very rarely, and no longer follows me around the house as often. I wanted a cat because I love to snuggle and pet and cuddle, and I figured that a cat would give that to me (I wasn't allowed to get a dog). But now, Frankie is so different from what I was expecting that it has driven me to tears sometimes. And it certainly doesn't help considering how she is a kitten, and kittens are almost always more affectionate than adults. If this is her "affectionate," than I can only imagine how aloof she will be as an adult.
It's gotten to that point where I've even began to regret adopting her and wondering if it would be best for both of us to give her back. It is such a horrible thought, I know, and I despise myself every time it crosses my mind, and yet I just can't stop it from doing that :crying:. Part of it is likely because I already had cats carefully picked out and yet I gave way to pressure and made a hasty decision anyway. Not to mention the fact that this isn't actually the first time this has happened. Back in January, I adopted a 2 year old female named Joy. I don't want to go into that much detail, but let's just say we did EVERYTHING wrong and it go so bad that it was basically irreversible so we gave Joy back. That feeling of giving back an animal after making a commitment is the worst feeling possible, and I just don't know if I can do that again, especially considering how Frankie is beginning to bond with me. But at the same time, I don't know if I can ever be happy with her if she continues to act this way. It's been stressing me out to point where I can barely sleep. I really need advice...please help.
Except we got completely snowed.
What we weren't told until after the fact was that she was spayed THE DAY BEFORE we saw her at the shelter, and was still under the effects of anesthesia. The next day, she was zipping about everywhere and no longer wanted to be held at all. She still gave head bonks if I held my hand out to her, but then she'd simply slide her body along my hand and then walk away. She tolerates pets but I can't really say that she asks for them. However, the one thing that I loved about her was that she loved to snuggle. In the afternoon, she'd hop up onto the bed when I was on my computer, snuggle up right next or on my lap, and fall asleep. But it's been a month and now it seems like she's stopped ALL affectionate gestures. She no longer snuggles, occasionally head bonks but very rarely, and no longer follows me around the house as often. I wanted a cat because I love to snuggle and pet and cuddle, and I figured that a cat would give that to me (I wasn't allowed to get a dog). But now, Frankie is so different from what I was expecting that it has driven me to tears sometimes. And it certainly doesn't help considering how she is a kitten, and kittens are almost always more affectionate than adults. If this is her "affectionate," than I can only imagine how aloof she will be as an adult.
It's gotten to that point where I've even began to regret adopting her and wondering if it would be best for both of us to give her back. It is such a horrible thought, I know, and I despise myself every time it crosses my mind, and yet I just can't stop it from doing that :crying:. Part of it is likely because I already had cats carefully picked out and yet I gave way to pressure and made a hasty decision anyway. Not to mention the fact that this isn't actually the first time this has happened. Back in January, I adopted a 2 year old female named Joy. I don't want to go into that much detail, but let's just say we did EVERYTHING wrong and it go so bad that it was basically irreversible so we gave Joy back. That feeling of giving back an animal after making a commitment is the worst feeling possible, and I just don't know if I can do that again, especially considering how Frankie is beginning to bond with me. But at the same time, I don't know if I can ever be happy with her if she continues to act this way. It's been stressing me out to point where I can barely sleep. I really need advice...please help.