Still Miss You

[rothhar]

This is about my cat of almost 20 years Nimrod, I had to have him euthanized back in April of this year and I still miss him so much.

Nimrod came into my life when I was at my lowest, My Dad had died suddenly a month earlier and I had turned to drugs and alcohol trying to kill the pain. Thats when I got a call from my niece that someone had tossed a cat out of a car
and she needed to find a home for it, I had no intention of taking in a cat but to shut her up I agreed to at least come see it. What I saw made me so sad, he was so thin and had a hurt front leg he was only about 8 or 9 months old
and I felt so sorry for him. At the time I was living in a basement and even though I knew that wasnt going to be the best enviroment for him but I figured it was better than the way his life was going.

Well as it turned out we were saving each other, He was something that I could hold onto in my pain and he was so full of love. As he grew, we grew very close, he was always there for me and in the end I can only hope at his time of need I was there for him.

The day I had to take him in to the vet, my niece came down and gave me a tag with his name on the front and on the back it says
1989-2009 You are loved, I will miss you

I miss you Nimrod

[marie73]

I tell people that Cinderella and I rescued each other. I can only hope to have as many wonderful years with her as you had with Nimrod.

I'm so glad you were there for each other.

[hoofmaiden]

{{{ HUGS }}} It DOES get easier, but heck, I still miss Lenny, who left me for the Bridge in 1991! After a while, though, it does become mostly happy memories and less active misery, if that helps any . . . .

[melysion]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I know what you mean. I lost my faithful old hound earlier this year. He was 18 years old. We had been though such a lot together. He was my little protector and my best friend.

I still think of him every day and still remember how he felt in my arms.

It will get better and we will be here if you need us.

[[[[hugs]]]]

[rothhar]

thank you for your posts, I havnt been back to this site since that post I made because even now as I type I start thinking about Nimrod and the tears start flowing again but I know he is in a better place waiting for the day we will be together again.
I had a dream the other day and in it Nimrod came out from under my bed and I got hold him again, in the dream it was so nice then I woke up so sad knowing that he isnt there, but in my mind it was him letting me know that he will always be with me

[blondiegrl211]

I heard something on a show once, where it was said to a grieving person, "It gets better..." and the person responded, "No... It gets different, not better."

I grieved and cried for my departed Blondie for two years. Sometimes out of the blue I'd have a complete crying jag because the pain was still so deep and fresh it seemed. Finally I decided to help out at the shelter as a form of immersion therapy and yes, I wound up adopting 2 cats. ****, I had to move just to have them, lol! And as much as they'll never replace Blondie, they have reminded me that it's wonderful to feel that love, to smile, to feel a fuzzy belly next to you at night and also, they reminded me that just as I let Blondie into my life and heart and shared that love, there are countless cats who need it desperately and have love in abundance to give me.

One thing, you say you were in trouble with drugs and alcohol and I commend you (as I assume) that's no longer the case. I can see a kitten pulling someone out of that, I really can. Maybe you could get involved with an alcohol rehab facility or a halfway house that places people in apartments and see if they can hook those folks up with shelter cats?

There's always some way to pay it back for our departed loved ones, human or otherwise.

Best of luck to you and just remember, Nimrod wasn't "just a cat" and it's more than okay to cry and talk with him.

[rothhar]

yes with Nimrod needing me(as much as I needed him) I stoped drinking and using drugs and instead would sit watching
old movies with Nimrod as I slowly worked through the pain/guilt over things in the past, it took along time, I'll be honest when I say I have my doubts if I could have done it with just any cat, Nimrod had been so neglected, half starved and injured I knew if I was going to help him I had to have a clear head, I didnt have the money to take him into a vet to be
checked so I did the best I could for him and he put on weight and healed up fine. even though it ment eating dog food
I would take from my roomates from time to time ( they had three dogs upstairs) but that is another story

The basement we were living in was so cold ( no heat in the house) and we would curl up together for warmth every night and he cleared the basement of spiders for me Our living conditions improved after a few years and things got better, I have so many memorys of him after 20 years, and the statement " No... It gets different, not better."
is very true, I doubt I'll ever truley be over losing him he was something to hold onto in my darkest hours and now he's gone.

I adopted two kittens from a shelter a few months ago, I love them both but they can never replace Nimrod we went through too many things together. Thanks for your kind words they mean alot