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post #1 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 10:25 AM Thread Starter
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Adoption Question

I'm working on lining up potential owners for the kittens, and I'm kind of in a dilemma -- I've got two gray kittens and three people who want them.

The first family expressed interest right after they were first born (a relative of a someone I know) but haven't contacted me since then. I'm really hesitant about this family because they've never owned a cat, it's a gift for a daughter's birthday (I think a little girl), and they told me they gave away a dog because it didn't get along with the children (or they didn't want to work with it).

The second family was through petfinder and first said they wanted a black kitten, but then they came by to see them over the weekend and instantly fell in love with one of the gray ones. So that's one is gone for sure.

The third person also was through petfinder who said she wanted to set up a time to meet the kittens if there were two boys: one gray and one black. I told her I don't know the sex of the cats but would find out this week when we go to the vet. Last night I emailed her about the first gray cat being selected and the other family's interest in the other gray cat, and she emailed back saying she thought I would tell her if someone had an interest since she hasn't come by to see them yet. I was assuming she only wanted to see them if there were two boys, which I don't know yet.

Now I don't know what to do...the first family I don't really know, and I'm kind of scared that this kitten will end up at the humane society (which is what I've been trying to avoid all along!), but I already talked to them about the kitten and said okay. I don't want to go back on my word, but I felt kind of strong armed into the whole thing and what they said about the dog really started getting to me.

I guess the one thing I keep thinking about is if they really wanted this cat, they would've contacted me in the past month about it. I told these people to stop by anytime, but they haven't. I know if I were looking forward to a new animal I'd be checking in and asking for pictures all the time.

Is it okay to say no now?
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post #2 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 10:40 AM
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Absolutely. The kittens' well-being is your ultimate priority, not their feelings. If they can't understand or respect that, forget 'em They're going to have this cat for the next 15-20 years, so you do whatever you need to make sure the homes are right.
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post #3 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 10:50 AM Thread Starter
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I guess I don't usually come off very diplomatic in these situations -- how do I say that without being a B****?
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post #4 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 10:59 AM
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Tell them that you have several interested adopters (not a total lie ), that you're doing your best to make the right decision for the kitten(s), and you're operating on a first-come-first-serve basis. You'll let them know how things work out. Then I'd usually call them a few days later, and say that another person who was interested adopted the kitten (this was true, though the adopter may not have been the first to ask ) If they balk about it, tell them about all the wonderful kittens in your local shelters
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post #5 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 11:03 AM
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If they have not called you....dont call them!
You never know....I bet they already got a kitten for their daughter.

{{{Deep Breath}}} It's going to work out!
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post #6 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 11:07 AM
 
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Ditto what SpaceMonkey said, but I have something to add.

When we have people come in that we just don't want to adopt to, we look at the pre-adoption form and see if there is anything on there that we can use to our advantage. If we have someone with a kid and we don't want to adopt to the lady, one of us tells them that none of these kittens would be good with small children.

We had one lady come in who wanted a kitten and she had a 4 year old girl. This lady had two cats before, but when she got pregnant, got rid of them. Now she wanted another cat...but what if she got pregnant again...was she going to give away those cats too?!? So we just told her that none of the cats/kittens we had would be good with small children.

Take Care
Abhay
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post #7 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 11:25 AM Thread Starter
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My first thought was take Dawn's approach -- I don't have their number, and they never stopped by to see them, so I was just going to say the kitten was adopted out to another family that was really interested. But I see the person who told their cousin about the kitten fairly often, so there might be some conflict there.

I guess the more upfront approach will be to tell them I reconsidered and don't want to adopt the kittens to anyone with small children (which I really don't!). Then if they said something, I was just going to show them my hands, chest, and face with all the kitten "love" scratches.

I guess I'm just not very assertive
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post #8 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 11:28 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
{{{Deep Breath}}} It's going to work out! Very Happy
I sure hope so, Dawn...with the mother in heat, my two cats acting crazy all the time with the kittens in the house, the kittens starting to get into everything, and I have no escape because I'm working at home, I just don't know how I'm going to survive these next few weeks without my hair falling out![/code]
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post #9 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 11:54 AM
 
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I agree, don't call them if they haven't called you. If they do call and inquire about the kitten after he's been placed, I'd just tell them that you didn't know they were still interested since they didn't call you.
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post #10 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-11-2005, 11:59 AM Thread Starter
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That's what my boyfriend said -- they are on my time, I shouldn't have to wait on them to decide. If they haven't contacted me (and it has been almost a month), I can go ahead and find it a good home. So I guess I will tell the third family that they can come visit the kitten to see if they like it. Whew...

You guys are great, thanks for all the good advice!
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