Any shortcut to socialization here....? - Cat Forum : Cat Discussion Forums
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post #1 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-13-2011, 10:01 AM Thread Starter
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Any shortcut to socialization here....?

Ok will try to make a long story short.3 cats; yellow male here 1st. got a female kitten kept her seperated upstairs for weeks and did the towel rubbing exchange thing and introduced her slowly a bit everyday. They are besties even though he goes outside and when she came home from the vet(all are desexed)~never a problem.Add in a stray black cat. yellow knew him from outside did like much at first at all! Neutered the black cat but he won't stay in all day....Female seems a bit afraid of him but I have actually seen the yellow male lick the black male on the ear once (outside) but sometimes they "tiff"(usually seems to be a yellow males' problem)a few swipes and some yowling and I say "be nice" and they do.They also share a basement (flap in the door for inclement weather)I go down there they are in together and no killing each other, but if they are both in the house the yellow one always seems to want out.The female and yellow male play several times a day.I have seen the black male(who is younger) seem to want to play with the female she kind of "screams" if he chases her or tries to play with her .....I would like to see them all get along even better so that maybe the black male wouldn't want out so much and would stay in and play with one or the other of them I just dread the thought of keeping him captive upstairs in a room for weeks and weeks as sometimes he wants to mark if stressed...Is there anyway to try to socialize them without the whole lengthy process and at this point will that even work (been almost 2 yrs)? I appreciate suggestions on this subject.(p.s. I wish I could keep all 3 in all day long for many reasons(fleas,cars diseases from other cats I know all that believe me). I would if I could. I have tried, but the males are unhappy and stressed and mark if I do that and it has taken me a year and much money and stress to ME to curb that behavior, so even though I worry myself SICK and try to let them out at times when I hear NO traffic on the road I do have to let them out some)Thanks in advance to anyone who might be able to offer some tips to help them to get along better :-D
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post #2 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-13-2011, 10:13 AM
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a few people here might have more suggestions. Have you tried something like Feliway? or You can always try adding an outdoor enclosure they can go into.
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post #3 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-13-2011, 11:10 AM
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I foster cats & work with a rescue and the reality is that males sexed after they have reached maturity do have a tendency to mark when competing for resources -even when there are in actuality plenty of resources to go around.
Sounds like you have been through a whole lot of the planned and trial and error part of the introduction process over the past 2 years. There may be long term experts with more valuable info and other ideas but I have a few direct from fostering you could try.

Cats in home fostering are often thrown together while waiting to be s/n or shortly thereafter, during good adoption periods turnover is high which creates it's own sort of imbalance that helps keep many on good behavior during slower turnover times or when numbers of kitties get lower the real 'staking a claim' type behavior starts.

Knowing that is where my experience comes from I offer the following for you to consider:
bathes - yes no cat really likes them but all of the cats/kittens I recieve get at least 3 with a specialty shampoo from the vet to treat and calm skin conditions - side effect I've noticed over time, unhappy damp kitties ban together for warmth and comfort even if they weren't comfortable with each other before the bath.
To be clear I dont endanger anybody - after the bath each freshly washed cat is relegated to a large bathroom where the heat is turned up to at least 80 degrees or if clear enough to intermingle in the whole house I set up a warm spot in front of the gas fireplace. the mutual licking and huddling generally eases tentions between cats for several days to a week when a second round of bathes can clear the air again.

This may or may not help as mulch with the outside kitties but it couldn't hurt - just be sure they are dry and warm before going outdoors again. using scented wipes as the boys come in might help as well idk if it is enough of scent change to impact the balance.

Just something that works for me - btw I'v enoticed it lessens marking by the boys that are in viewing cages as well, even when they are caged alone - go figure.
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post #4 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-16-2011, 09:27 PM Thread Starter
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Thanks for your help.Yes I have tried Feliway (straight for 6 months~whew the stuff is expensive!) been off it now for 2 and really the marking so far(knock wood) isn't prevalent again, it is just I wanted them to get along better anyway,Yes I have (and am) considering an outdoor enclosure as well that they can go into from their basement because I am getting more worried about them being out and about everyday. I guess I just really wondered (besides a bath ,which I may try, but which, all of mine find tramatic and I wish they didn't) If I could get the female and the longhaired male to play instead of her being afraid of him because the yellow one is old and doesn't want to play with her much anymore and she could still have a playmate in the younger black one, if there were any "shortcut" type tips rather than caging him up for weeks on end.But I do appreciate the tips that were mentioned and that you took the time to read and respond to me I thank you so much! =D
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post #5 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-17-2011, 01:32 AM
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Have you tried playing with the young black male and female together with an interactive toy like "Da Bird" or other fishing-pole type of toy, or a long ostrich feather? Go back and forth between them with the toy and when they tire of it, give them some treats. When cats are fixed on the toy it can make them forget about being afraid of the other or being nasty. You want them to associate that playing together is fun and treats. Sometimes though you just can't make a cat like another. For whatever reason, it does sound as if the girl is uneasy with him because of fear. If you can get her to play with him, lavish praise on her, or even if she'll eat treats with him....or eat a could feed them apart and then feed them closer together. This won't work tho, if he's a faster eater than she is and then goes after her food. You can also groom them with the same comb, this will mix their scents. Try some of these things and see if you can hit on something that works for her.
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post #6 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-14-2011, 04:11 AM Thread Starter
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Thanks for the additional 2 suggestions. I have tried the feather toy playing to no avail I will try brushing them with the same brush and the treats idea and I still welcome anymore ideas to help them get along Thanks again =D
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post #7 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-14-2011, 09:27 PM
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Something that has helped ease the tension btw Prince and Princess is that I call him to bed when I'm lying there with her and I pet both of them at the same time and alternatively, while they each lie on either side of me. They fall asleep like that. Then we wake up and I get up and they are able to stay next to each other without aggression, without me. I'm hoping on building from there.

The Royal von Meouw Dynasty: His Royal Highness the late Prince von Meouw,
Her Royal Highness Princess Gatita von Meouw, Nikita Duchess of Meouw and
His Highness Cuchi-Cuchi, next in line for the throne of Prince von Meouw.
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