Kitten gets very upset when only my mom touches her - Cat Forum : Cat Discussion Forums
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post #1 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-11-2015, 05:55 PM Thread Starter
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Kitten gets very upset when only my mom touches her

So she is 7 months old and we have had her since 3 months. My mom is the one who mainly feeds her but whenever my mom goes to pet her or if my mom gets her hand near her, kitty will just swipe her hand away and gets defensive. The weird thing here is that all throughout the day Princess will always be around my mom and always follows my mom when she goes to bed (she sleeps with my mom and under her bed always). Shes always following my mom around which makes it very weird why would she be getting defensive when ONLY my mom's hand is near her? The only time she will let my mom touch her is after she wakes up and wants her belly rubbed but she really doesn't get defensive at all with anyone else. What can we do?
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post #2 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-12-2015, 02:01 AM Thread Starter
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Wanted to add that she was just spayed 2 months ago when she was 5 months old I don't know if that would have anything to do with it? When we first got her she used to come sit in my moms lap and wouldn't mind but now she doesn't want my moms hand near her (EXCEPT when my mom wakes up at 4AM she will allow belly rubs) and she knows she's going to get food since my mom is the one mainly feeding her even though she follows my mom all day from when she wakes up til she goes to bed! My mom wanted me to add that at night when she follows her to bed she will sleep on my mom's feet for a little and then by her head by her pillow for a little and then just go under the bed and sleep there. Obviously she doesn't mind my mom. When she was younger my mom used a water spray bottle when she would scratch our couches, which she doesn't do anymore and gave her a bath twice. I doubt this had an effect on this since this started around 3 weeks ago or so. We have some Feliway spray left to try? Thanks again in advance, just don't want her to grow up like this .

Last edited by yo0123yo; 01-12-2015 at 02:05 AM.
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post #3 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-12-2015, 08:22 PM
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It's so hard to figure out what they're thinking sometimes!

So she doesn't swat at anyone else's hand? Does the swatting seem angry? Is it only once? It might have something to do with the way your mom approaches her that makes her fearful. If your mom is standing and then bending down to pet her with her hand out, maybe Princess feels threatened, whereas when your mom's already in bed, it's not a big scary thing coming down at her. If that's the issue, then your mom could try squatting to be at your kitty's level before reaching a hand out.

Or maybe something has changed with your mom - a new hand lotion or perfume or something, that makes her smell different so that Princess doesn't recognize her hand at first? Cats are very sensitive to smells.

I don't think the spay would have anything to do with it, unless there are other behavior changes as well.

It doesn't sound like she's stressed, although Feliway can't hurt. I wonder, if your mom sprayed some Feliway on a paper towel and then rubbed it on her hand, how Princess would react?
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post #4 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-12-2015, 09:58 PM Thread Starter
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It's so hard to figure out what they're thinking sometimes!

So she doesn't swat at anyone else's hand? Does the swatting seem angry? Is it only once? It might have something to do with the way your mom approaches her that makes her fearful. If your mom is standing and then bending down to pet her with her hand out, maybe Princess feels threatened, whereas when your mom's already in bed, it's not a big scary thing coming down at her. If that's the issue, then your mom could try squatting to be at your kitty's level before reaching a hand out.

Or maybe something has changed with your mom - a new hand lotion or perfume or something, that makes her smell different so that Princess doesn't recognize her hand at first? Cats are very sensitive to smells.

I don't think the spay would have anything to do with it, unless there are other behavior changes as well.

It doesn't sound like she's stressed, although Feliway can't hurt. I wonder, if your mom sprayed some Feliway on a paper towel and then rubbed it on her hand, how Princess would react?
She will keep swatting her hand away and if my mom keeps trying to pet her she will eventually start hissing angrily. We tried the Feliway today to no avail. She follows my mom literally everywhere but won't allow my mom to pet her.
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post #5 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-12-2015, 10:30 PM
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Hmmmm...this is interesting! I'm also thinking that something about her scent is different...
Stactic electricity maybe?
How does your mom approach her with her hands?
Approaching with hands at under chin level, is a good way to start...
Offer kitty a closed hand at nose level, let the kitty sniff, and make the first move, if kitty rubs her hand, with her face, offer a under the chin scratch, or a cheek scratch...
Go slowly from there....
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An everyday family name; A particular name;
And the name but the Cat Himself Knows, and will never confess." T.S. Eliot

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post #6 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-12-2015, 11:08 PM
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I was thinking like 10cats. with it being cold out, I have seen one of my dogs pull one heck of a face at the smell of hand lotion. So switched people to a milder lotion...

could it be something she is putting on?
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post #7 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-13-2015, 01:12 AM Thread Starter
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I was thinking like 10cats. with it being cold out, I have seen one of my dogs pull one heck of a face at the smell of hand lotion. So switched people to a milder lotion...

could it be something she is putting on?

Hmm she is never using lotion or anything g that would change her scent. The ONLY time kitty will allow my mom to touch her is right after waking up and she wants belly rubs and food. My mom always approaches her low so she's on the same level so she doesn't scare her but as soon as she starts getting her hand near Princess she will definitely start angrily meowing and swatting her hand away, regardless if she is trying to pet her head or body. Its not just happening once its getting to be a routine thing for her. We really don't understand this since my mom is who always feeds her and she is always following her around the house! Would love to "fix" this behavior problem if we could while she's still 7 months old. Thanks again for all your help
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post #8 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-13-2015, 02:02 AM
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One thing she might try is to approach her with her palm up. My cat backs away like she expects to be hit if anyone approaches her with the palm facing down (including me, and I've had her for 13 years). Although...since you said it just started recently, it seems like something must have changed.

Does she like it when other people pet her? One of my cats just didn't like petting very much, and if I tried to pet her when she wasn't in the mood, she'd reach her paw out and grab my hand. As hard as it might be for your mom, maybe she should try just not petting her for a couple of days and waiting to see if/when Princess comes to her to ask for pets? Or maybe she could try approaching her with a treat in her hand?
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post #9 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-13-2015, 05:07 AM Thread Starter
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One thing she might try is to approach her with her palm up. My cat backs away like she expects to be hit if anyone approaches her with the palm facing down (including me, and I've had her for 13 years). Although...since you said it just started recently, it seems like something must have changed.

Does she like it when other people pet her? One of my cats just didn't like petting very much, and if I tried to pet her when she wasn't in the mood, she'd reach her paw out and grab my hand. As hard as it might be for your mom, maybe she should try just not petting her for a couple of days and waiting to see if/when Princess comes to her to ask for pets? Or maybe she could try approaching her with a treat in her hand?
Yea she doesn't mind anyone of us in the house picking her up or petting her, only minds my mom's hand yet my mom is who she will follow all day and go to bed with everyday . Ill tell her about her palm and see if it makes a difference. The ONLY time she will let my mom barely touch her is when she wants belly rubs after she gets up in the AM.
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post #10 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-13-2015, 08:08 AM
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I wonder if Princess is trying to be independent like human adolescents? She probably views your mother as her mother, and she might be trying to say she's no longer a kitten?
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