I have a tendency to type a lot so I want to keep this as short as I can...
Last year my mom adopted two kittens against my will with no regard toward our much older resident cat. The kittens love each other, but my older cat hates them both and avoids old haunts and being out in the open too much anymore because she hates when they approach her to play.
These kittens are very affectionate toward me being that I was the one who raised them. They sleep on me, they want to constantly be near me, but they are not my cats even though I deeply care for them.
They avoid my mother who is distressed by them not liking her and now she is starting to talk about and become fixated on the thought of getting ANOTHER kitten because she wants a cuddly cat. She is not home a lot and is somebody very preoccupied with their career who has free time maybe 4 hours a day, and sometimes travels for weeks at a time. She's not in the position to raise kittens but she will not even consider an older cat because she does not want to be responsible for issues in traumatized animals and believes that cats pee on things because they're not litterbox trained (and not that they're stressed out). Having four cats is not the issue, it's that somebody else more equipped should have four cats and not my mother.
I feel like I got longwinded anyway. Basically... is there a way I can make the kittens more comfortable with my mom enough to sleep on her and approach her for cuddling in the same way they do for me?
I know they have it in them, but I'm not exactly sure what I can do to make them relax. I'm fully prepared to have to train them but my mom doesn't do anything for them really beyond giving them food in the morning and at night, whereas I spend the entire day with them in between because I work from home.
They don't like being approached or picked up all the time by me and I can respect that, but my mom just can't. It makes this hard because she thinks she understands animals. I feel really hopeless and we really don't need a fourth cat. I feel sick suggesting that we rehome the kittens if she wants one that badly, so I want to try this first at least. It sucks to be in a position of absolutely zero power.
And... now a very accurate representation of their relationship to each other lol.