Misunderstood or just mean? - Cat Forum : Cat Discussion Forums
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post #1 of 7 (permalink) Old 12-28-2004, 04:12 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2004
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Misunderstood or just mean?

I have an 8 year old American Bobtail who I love a lot but she makes it hard because of many negative traits.

1) She doesn't get along with people. She likes me and my best friend (she lived with us when we shared an apartment) but avoids everyone else including my wife.

2) She doesn't get along with other pets. She either avoids or attacks the other animals (3 cats and 2 dogs). She was extremely aggressive to my wife's cat when it was a kitten (further embittering my wife towards her), and has my Chinese Crested dog terrified from being swatted at or bit (thank God she's declawed).

3) She routinely urinates on the carpet, bathroom rugs and clothes left on the bathroom floor. The vet did not find a UTI. I keep one box per cat, clean them daily and fill them with soft, clumping litter. Her behavior got her expelled from the house (into the fenced backyard). But with the onset of cold weather, I moved her into a bedroom. In this small area, she used the box appropriately. However, upon release into the house she immediately went back to her bad habits.

I'm wondering: 1) If I have any chance at this stage in her life of stopping the urination; 2) If continued efforts are even worth the hassle given the discord she causes with my wife and other pets.

I'm loathe to get rid of her as she's the only cat I've owned for any length of time but I'm running out of options.
BobsDad is offline  
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post #2 of 7 (permalink) Old 12-28-2004, 05:20 PM
Cool Cat
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Garden State
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You will hear many opinions, but from my point of view, i think it's time to say goodbuy to this cat. I adore animals, but when they start making your life miserable, and it seems you almost kicked this cat out of your house anyway if not for cold weather, maybe it's time to give her away? Post up signs or advertise online or in your local paper, i'm sure you'l have takers who will want to adopt. Just be upfront with all her 'problems'.

good luck
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post #3 of 7 (permalink) Old 12-28-2004, 05:22 PM
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 12,677
sounds like this cat likes to be left alone, except with her favorite human. some cats simply are stressed in crowds; it's part of their personality. if it was a young cat in a new household, I would suggest just giving her time, but at her age, and as this has been ongoing, I doubt it will change much. one thing you can try, which I haven't had need to use myself, but many others here in the cat forum have, is a device which creates a calmative effect on the cat. this may ease her stress. here's a link you can research:


this device is sold at Petsmart; also many online pet supplies retailers.

good luck!!

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post #4 of 7 (permalink) Old 12-28-2004, 06:00 PM
Cool Cat
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I'm wondering if her declawing may be a big part of the issue. I've noticed that a disproportionate number of declaws have both aggression (especially biting) and litterbox issues, and especially when they're stressed by strange situations, other animals, or people they're not used to...which may explain why she seems happier in her own room where there's no one to infringe on "her" territory.

Obviously, if that's the case, there's little you can do to remedy it short of rehoming the cat, maybe with a single-pet senior citizen who can give the cat a quiet, non-threatening home. Try local shelters and see if they have a senior-pets-for-senior-people program or know of one nearby.

Was she like this before she was declawed?
Gudewife is offline  
post #5 of 7 (permalink) Old 12-28-2004, 09:56 PM Thread Starter
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Was she like this before she was declawed?
Unfortunately I had her a very short time before getting her declawed so it's hard to say. The other three cats are declawed too but the only one with an "attitude" is my manx. Came from the same SPCA as the problem child, but limits her aggression to yelling and the occasional slap.

I'm having her checked by the vet again for a UTI and might switch around litters and box location to see if I can isolate what she dislikes about using the box. I could live with her other issues if the urination was under control.

Does anyone know if the "manx gene" causes unstable personalties in addition to physical abnormalities?
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post #6 of 7 (permalink) Old 12-28-2004, 10:16 PM
Jr. Cat
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Posts: 88
If you give her away who is to say she wouldnt do it there? If she is not urinating on the carpet in your room maybe keep her in there. It sound behavioral because of the other critters.
My 10 year old cat went a bit off when I lost my 22 year old cat and she clears a room when the other critters in there. She will swat and hiss but she stays in my 2 daughters room willingly and only comes out to eat and do her business. You do whatever makes your animals happy and if that means keeping yours locked up, so be it. She would have a rough adjustment at her age in a new home and I dont think being thrown outside is the answer. She just likes being an only cat and I think she is trying to tell you that
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post #7 of 7 (permalink) Old 12-29-2004, 05:20 PM
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Originally Posted by LettuceLady
She just likes being an only cat and I think she is trying to tell you that
I'd agree with this, from Bob'sDad's description of her behavior. She sounds stressed out. Some cats just like being only cats.

When they were young, all the kitties would play together, but now that they're grown, My Kayla will not play anymore with the others. She likes having her alone time, and there are areas that are exclusively hers - hubby's pillow, under the sideboard, etc. Sometimes if she's in the bedroom, I'll close it for a few hours so she can have some exclusive time. She seems to really appreciate it.
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