am I being selfish? - Cat Forum : Cat Discussion Forums
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post #1 of 51 (permalink) Old 03-27-2014, 05:05 PM Thread Starter
Bon
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am I being selfish?

(Maybe this should have been my introduction post?)

I am on disability due to being Bipolar (with the emphasis on depression.)

Is it wrong (or selfish or whatever) of me to want to adopt 2 kittens to keep me company during the day when hubby is at work and I'm alone? Then I would have someone who NEEDS me to get up off my butt and FUNCTION. Someone who I could interact with, someone who I could think of besides JUST ME. I have been reading this forum like mad and asking questions so I will know what I am getting into and I KNOW from having pets before (tho never cats) that they are a COMMITMENT and the kittens WILL have a forever home with us.

My psychiatrist, my therapist and my hubby all think this would be a good thing for me. (Personally, I think the kittens should qualify as a “service animal”.)

In August when we move, we'll be moving to a cat-friendly apartment. Hubby is EXTREMELY supportive of me wanting/getting 2 kittens and is going to help me build a cat tree – I have to do the sisal wrapping and carpet attaching to the shelves and he'll put it all together (cuz he's a carpenter).

I feel like I am pregnant! I go between being so excited that I can barely stand it to feeling so overwhelmed that I don't know how I can stand that!

All of the pets I've had before were snap-decision/no planning events – I've had a dog, 3 rabbits and a 6' iguana in the last 22 yrs hubby + I have been together. I've never PLANNED on an adoption the way I am now and I am SO second guessing myself - I don't know if I am being selfish or what . . .

Maybe I just needed to vent . . . thanks for "listening" . . .

Bon.
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post #2 of 51 (permalink) Old 03-27-2014, 05:09 PM
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Kittens are very sweet, and their antics are adorable...but they are a LOT of work. Two kittens is easier than one in some ways, but it's also double the paws to trim.

TBH I'd think a calmer and more relaxed adult cat might help more...but I'm a big fan of going to the shelter and letting the cat pick you. Adult cats have much harder times finding homes, adult bonded pairs even more so.
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post #3 of 51 (permalink) Old 03-27-2014, 05:26 PM
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As long as the added financial burden (i.e. cat food/litter/vet appointments) won't be a strain, then I say go for it! You don't necessarily need to adopt kittens, a bonded pair of young adults i.e. ~2 years old could work as well. Good luck with your decision.

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post #4 of 51 (permalink) Old 03-27-2014, 05:31 PM
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I don't think it is selfish as long as you are committed to the welfare of the cats and giving them a forever home, not just your own welfare. I think it is a win-win.
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post #5 of 51 (permalink) Old 03-27-2014, 05:38 PM
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1) can you afford to properly care for the added kitten appetites?
2) can you properly provide attention, love, and playtime for the kittens?
3) can you provide them with a separate room for quarantine/slow introduction to the existing household?

If yes to all the above, go forth and kitten.....
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post #6 of 51 (permalink) Old 03-27-2014, 05:56 PM
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I think you're going to enjoy them tremendously. They'll drive you nuts, but you'll find yourself falling in love every minute.

Like you said, they will be very helpful in establishing a routine. (cats LOVE routines!)
I think the kittens would be perfect because they are so needy. They will keep you on your toes, so no time to mope around

And just think, somewhere there are a couple of little kittens daydreaming about their forever home. What their new kitty mom will be like. Going to sleep each night hoping she will be someone like you.


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post #7 of 51 (permalink) Old 03-27-2014, 06:16 PM
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I am on total disability for Bipolar 1 and Complex PTSD. My psych and therapist both thought it would be a good idea to have a companion animal. My psych even wrought a script so that the apt. I lived in would take Mia. I have had her for 3 years now and she gives me a reason to get up and going in the mornings. I love her dearly and I know she does me too. I cant imagine life without her. She has helped me thru so much. Even a stroke and now my epilepsy. I think it would be great for you to have a cat. Just know that most apt. buildings will only let you have no more than one and usually only with a dr. prescription.

Mia was 7 weeks old when I got her. It was a lot of work but VERY rewarding too.

Last edited by Penny135; 03-27-2014 at 06:19 PM. Reason: add on
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post #8 of 51 (permalink) Old 03-27-2014, 07:12 PM
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I salute you for your openness about your bipolar.
Hope things would be better for you very soon.

I totally recommend you to bring a cat... and to be precise: a Kitten. Having a very small pet in your hands will get you engaged fast with it in a very tired-up bond. And the bond would be reciprocal. The kitten will give you more love, affection, and feelings as in return it would expect attention, care, and dedicated time.

Having a double will double everything... from the pleasurable moments to the painstaking hours. But I am sure they will keep you totally occupied. Just manage a routine-schedule for them and they follow it.

I have lived 17 years alone in my apartment... when I first brought Blacky a few months ago, it was just a little black ball of fur. I watched him grew and change.. and the more I watch, the more I get in contact with him, and the more my love grows for him. His presence has changed many things in my life... and all are positive things.

Go for it. Don't hesitate.
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post #9 of 51 (permalink) Old 03-27-2014, 07:38 PM
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I don't think your selfish at all....
As long as you keep up and make sure you are medicated or going to counselling to keep level, its definitely a part of therapy....
I fought real bad depression (suicidal) and a bit of ptsd (bad boyfriends) and cats got me loving life again....
So as long as you are able to take care of them if they are sick and right on top of your counselling sessions, it will definitely make your therapy very well rounded.
It helped me tremendously....
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post #10 of 51 (permalink) Old 03-28-2014, 05:21 AM
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I agree. I suffer from chronic depression and is was feeling a bit lonely because my schedule at my new job meant that I was working on a different schedule than my boyfriend, so I got a cat and it has been wonderful. She definitely has motivated me to get up earlier and keep a routine. And it's wonderful coming home to a loving cat who greets me at the door rather than an empty home.
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