Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road? - Cat Forum : Cat Discussion Forums
 
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post #1 of 4 (permalink) Old 08-16-2004, 07:27 PM Thread Starter
 
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Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

I had a blast when I read these - I may find some more in time ..util then enjoy the 40 posted

1.Col. Saunders:
It Ran, Suh! I offered it a coating of 11 herbs and spices and it ran, Suh! So I shot it, Suh, shot it while it was trying to escape, suh!

2.Yoda (3):
Do not under-estimate the powers of the road, or suffer the butcher's block you will!

3.Jackie Mason:
Whaddaya want, it should just stand there?

4.George Orwell:
Because Big Brother was watching to make sure that it did cross the road, although in its heart, the chicken never did.

5.Jabba the Hut:
I have little use for chickens who drop their eggs at first sign of a cross-walk.

6.Carl Jung:
The confluence of events in the cultural gesalt necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at this historical juncture, and therefore synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.

7.James Tiberius Kirk:
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

8.Any Late Evening News Anchor:
The chicken crosses the road. Film at 11:00.

9.Ben Stone (Law and Order):
Because the defendant made it, sir.

10.Bill Gates:
For the money

11.The Red Queen:
Who cares? Off with it's head!

12.George Steinbrenner2:
Because I fired him!

13.Khan:
With my last breath I spit at the chicken...

14.Socrates:
To pick up some hemlock at the corner druggist.

15.Soren Kierkegaard:
The chicken is dead. The road is nothing.

16.Darth Vader (2):
The circle is now comlete. When I left you, I was a chick... Now, I am the rooster!

17.Karl Marx:
It was a historical inevitability.

18.Jean-Luc Picard:
To see what's out there.

19.E.T.:
Chicken, phone home

20.Ayn Rand:
The chicken crossed the road in order to get away from the flock that is stifling his creativity.

21.Jacques Derrida:
Any number of contending discourses may be discovered within the act of the chicken crossing the road, and each interpretation is equally valid as the authorial intent can never be discerned, because structuralism is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!

22.John Milton:
To justify the ways of God to men.

23.The White Rabbit:
It was late!

24.Sisyphus:
Was it pushing a rock, too?

25.Bob Dylan:
How many roads must a chicken travel down, before they call him a man?

26.Mae West:
'Cause I invited it to come up and see me sometime.

27.Piglet:
Because ch-ch-chickens are such very s-s-s-small animals.

28.Microsoft Chicken (TM):
It's already on both sides of the road. And it just bought the road.

29.Albert Einstein:
Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends on your frame of reference.

30.Robert Frost:
To cross the road less traveled by.

31.George Lucas:
Because the Force was with it.

32.Edgar Allan Poe:
Quoth the chicken,"Nevermore!"

33.Newton Chicken:
Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket !

34.The Borg:
Crossing the road is irrelevant. It will be assimilated.

35.Paris:
Well, I think that...say, that's a lovely shirt you're wearing.

36.Jim Morrison:
To break on through to the other side, I am the chicken king

37.Rhett Butler:
Frankly my dear, it didn't give a ****!


38.Emily Dickinson:
Because it could not stop for death.

39.Epicurus:
For fun.

40.Neil Armstrong:
One small step for chickenkind, one giant leap for poultry.
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post #2 of 4 (permalink) Old 08-16-2004, 08:57 PM
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Hehe those cracked me up
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post #3 of 4 (permalink) Old 08-17-2004, 01:31 AM Thread Starter
 
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I am glad you enjoyed them, Kim
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post #4 of 4 (permalink) Old 08-19-2004, 10:31 AM
 
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so hillarious

those were funny! thankz for the good laugh!
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