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post #1 of 11 (permalink) Old 04-16-2008, 12:20 AM Thread Starter
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I'm stumped...any ideas?

I'm trying to write a little paper and I have this sentance:

"Each course that I completed was an experience that made me a more well rounded individual."

I hate it. The part I want to change is the "well rounded" part. But I can't come up with any better way to say this...

help!
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post #2 of 11 (permalink) Old 04-16-2008, 12:28 AM
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Each course I have completed has helped make me a well rounded individual.

Each course I have completed and experience I have learned from has helped make me a well rounded individual.


I had an instructor who did not like the use of "that" in sentences. ...and I think "more" is the word in your sentence that threw me 'off'. (thinking of 'more better', that is what it seemed like, to me)



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post #3 of 11 (permalink) Old 04-16-2008, 12:33 AM Thread Starter
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I kept playing with words like "complete", "balanced", etc

Instead of well rounded...but it does sound good (improper english, I know) the way you have corrected it.

I'll probably just stick that in there...I can't think of anything better.
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post #4 of 11 (permalink) Old 04-16-2008, 12:44 AM
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...has helped add to my knowledge-base. ?
...has increased my useful knowledge. ?
...has increased my knowledgeable store of facts/skills. ?
...has been a great benefit to my education. ?

Too much for me, I'm going to bed. 'night!
h



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post #5 of 11 (permalink) Old 04-16-2008, 12:52 AM
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How about:

"Each course I have completed has served to create a well rounded experience "

"well balanced experience"

"well rounded and multi-faceted experience"

"each course has built upon the next to create a solid foundation"

..... I was an art history major in college - this reminds me of sitting with friends riffing off of anything we happened to see around us, just to keep the b.s. skills sharp...! Fran
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post #6 of 11 (permalink) Old 04-16-2008, 01:01 AM Thread Starter
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Thanks for the ideas!
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post #7 of 11 (permalink) Old 04-16-2008, 01:15 AM
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"Each course that i completed gave me the experience to grow into a well balanced and mindful individual."

"Each course that i completed gained me knowledge in the aspects of life that contibutes to more balanced, fruitfully minded human being."

"Each course that I completed contibuted to my own personal self, allowing me to grow as a stong, independant woman of the 21st century."
(Okay now im just starting to directly quote lines from my school days haha, can you tell i went to an all girls school? )

Sincerely, Krystle.
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post #8 of 11 (permalink) Old 04-16-2008, 01:26 AM
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Not having any idea of the context, my first reaction is that the problem with "well-rounded" is that it's one of those things you say when you don't actually have anything to say. Sort of like saying your date has "good personality."

Maybe think more specifically about how these courses helped make you well-rounded: helped you lean more about math and science when previously you had focused primarily on the humanities (or vice versa)? Caused to you think about X, Y, and Z in a way you had never thought about it previously? Etc?

Just my first thought.
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post #9 of 11 (permalink) Old 04-16-2008, 08:05 AM
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Ummmm....I wouldn't use the sentence the way you wrote it. First thing I thought of was that you were eating too many courses and getting fat .

Don't have time to think on it right now, but will later if you haven't settled on something....


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post #10 of 11 (permalink) Old 04-16-2008, 08:18 PM
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Ummmm....I wouldn't use the sentence the way you wrote it. First thing I thought of was that you were eating too many courses and getting fat .


Lauren&

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