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post #1 of 33 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 09:57 PM Thread Starter
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Very very frustrated ..... vent

I can absolutly scream with aggravation .....

Sandy and Garth

Neither of these two are very tidy and their room looks like a pigsty , they dont bath themselves or Hailey daily and Hailey isnt in a routine and neither are they trying to get her into one .....

Sunday night , after me battling to get wind out of her ( the parents dont worry to much) Garth takes her to change her .... as usual she is plunked on a pile of clothing ... I hear Garth scream ... them Sandy screams .... I go and see whats going on ..... Hornets have invaded their room ... I tell them both to shut up .... grab hailey to see if she has been stung .....

She was , but thank goodness only on her hand .... I leave hubs to sort out the screamers , and see to Hailey.


Of course by now I have had enough .. and decide to interfere .... under my roof one will be tidy and one WILL bath their baby every night and WILL get said baby into a routine .. I WILL not have an unruly toddler running aroung at 9pm at night .....

I get home form work at 4pm .. I quickly get supper on ...and then play with Hailey , to get wind up ..( she is now 3 mnth) .....

Last night she is very smelly from sour milk . and by the time I have finished tickling her and playing with her she is windless but is damp and and smellier from sour milk .

Hubs and I call them both for a chat ..... the importance of routine , the gentle winding down for bedtime , bathing yada yada yada ....

I have been completly ignored .................she was put to bed in a damp smelly baby gro .....

What the devil do I do ????????

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post #2 of 33 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 10:31 PM
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Oh dear, sounds like quite a mess Poor Carol! I don't know how much advice I can give, but the bottom line as I see it is that they're living in your house! They're adults and certainly have adult responsibilities, but if they're choosing to live with you, they should theoretically have to live by your standards. It sounds like you're doing your best to help Hailey get into a good routine. It sounds like some more talking-to's are in order and I hope you can get it all sorted out! Good luck

Robin and...
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post #3 of 33 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 10:36 PM
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hmmmm..... The only thing I can think of is telling them that they either follow your rules or go some where else. I know its really tough but they have to learn to be parents and adults really fast or else the baby is the one that is going to suffer the most
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post #4 of 33 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 11:20 PM
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Um, Carol, I don't usually recommend the use of firearms, but in this case it may be a necessary teaching tool.





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post #5 of 33 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 11:33 PM
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I second Gunterkat.


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post #6 of 33 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 11:34 PM
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The kids have to grow up and be responsible adults. That poor little lamb going to bed in that condition is sad. It's your home, Carol. I know you don't want to be the proverbial mean mother-in-law, but for the sake of the little one, I think you will have to enforce some rules.




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post #7 of 33 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 11:35 PM
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Well said, Jeanie. Carol how old are your son and his gf?

Robin and...
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post #8 of 33 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 05:33 AM
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I would be inclined to send them out on their own and keep the little one at my house until they get their act together. Hailey is at a sensitive age. What happens to her now can shape her entire life.

I just want to say that you are a special Grandma to be so concerned about her.


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Molly Brown December 2006- January 9, 2013
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post #9 of 33 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 11:25 AM
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Originally Posted by Leazie
I would be inclined to send them out on their own and keep the little one at my house until they get their act together.
I'm not sure this would work, only because if you remove the major responsibility people can sometimes get in the mindset of 'why bother, since I don't have to now'.

I think if they stay together as a family and some rules are enforced, certainly they will not like it, but it will be much better for them in the long run. If they complain, well...they can move out at any time. Besides, if they were acting as adults themselves, you wouldn't have to tell them what to do. So, either they can do it on their own without you telling them to do it, or you can nag them into doing it.
Give them a choice about it. Well, really, it isn't a choice; it is telling them what the consequences will be and they can choose which path they want to take to either accept or avoid the consequences.

When Hubby's Sis and her husband stayed with us, we laid down some rules. Mostly, we let them live in their room as they wished. The only smack-downs occured if they left food in their room and it drew ants or if they left the window open during rainstorms. Their bathroom was the guest bathroom and it had to be kept presentable. Otherwise, they were responsible for themselves.
Of course, the whole thing turned south after the 'honeymoon' of living at a new place wore off and they found we expected them to contribute chore-wise to the household.

I understand your frustration. I hope you are able to find a way to make things better for the baby. Good luck.
h



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post #10 of 33 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 11:52 AM
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You are very right Heidi. I was thinking impulsively, not long term.


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Molly Brown December 2006- January 9, 2013
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