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post #1 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-25-2009, 08:13 AM Thread Starter
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Becoming our parents

At the whopping age of twenty-three, I can see so much of my mother and her mother in me that it's scary. My strongest images of mom & grandma were of them being up very, very early in the morning...the light coming into the house...the little one-serving dishes of leftovers in the freezer...dishes soaking first thing in the morning...cooking large amounts of food (for no one)...their hands, of course, we all know about getting our mothers' hands. I thought this would happen to me later in life, isn't this supposed to hit around thirty or forty? But here I am in my little house, I just made way too many pancakes on a ratty old pan, my freezer is full, my hands are getting wrinkly & rough, I'm puttering around cleaning here and there, and the sunlight's lit up the house brilliantly. I'm totally happy and self sufficient on my own, just like they are. No need of anyone else here, just enjoying the early morning. Oh, and just like the women in my family, I can't stay up later than 6:15 a.m. lol. At least I can still sleep past 4:00, unlike them. I'm different than my mother in many ways..our lifestyles are vastly different in important ways...but when I see myself as a woman, I see myself as those who came before me.

Please, please tell me your stories of when you found yourself in your parent's shoes!


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post #2 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-25-2009, 11:22 AM
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Re: Becoming our parents

TQ, I am cooking for 6...I can't stop, even though all four of my children are on their own. So, I find myself eating those leftovers for days! Maybe it's in our blood, an inherited trait. I don't know. ANd yes, I sometimes soak the dishes overnight. I have a dishwasher, but use it only when I have company.

I used to laugh inwardly as my mother called her cats "honey," and talked to them as if they understood every word she said. Well, of course I call my cats honey! (and mommy' babies) I think that we just become less worried about what other people think of us crazy cat people as we mature.




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post #3 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-25-2009, 12:30 PM
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Re: Becoming our parents

How funny that you post this as over the past few weeks I have found myself thinking more and more that I am becoming my mother. I always knew that I was my father in many ways, but never expected to also become my mother.

I have her hands, I now wear the same frumpy clothes when I am at home, my body now looks like hers. I wish I had her health instead of the health of my father.

It is scaring the pants off of me!


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post #4 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-25-2009, 01:17 PM
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Re: Becoming our parents

I don't think there's a chance in the world that I'll ever turn into my mother. Physically and personality, I'm my father all over.

My mother is very, very structured about the simplest little things...after you clean up breakfast you set the table for lunch, which is served promptly at noon. And after lunch is cleaned up, you set the table for dinner, which is served promptly at six. On the other hand I have very little structure around the minutiae of life. She worries about everything; will the weather mess up plans for Friday night (even though nothing is predicted)? I rarely worry. She carries a purse the size of a suitcase that I swear weighs 30 pounds (must be prepared for every situation), I carry the least amount of stuff I can get away with. The list of differences could just go on and on...

But, I have watched my mother turn into my grandmother. From the way she acts, to how she looks, to the things she says...she's almost a clone.


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post #5 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-25-2009, 01:23 PM
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Re: Becoming our parents

Quote:
I don't think there's a chance in the world that I'll ever turn into my mother. Physically and personality, I'm my father all over.
Ditto
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post #6 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-25-2009, 01:40 PM
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Re: Becoming our parents

It became obvious that I had something in common with my mother the first time I said, "Because I said so" to my children.

I have been told that I am very much like my grandmother on my dad's side. My mother used to tell me my hands were exactly like Grandma Helen's. My mother learned to call the cats like she did and I picked that up from her. It's a very fast kitty, kitty kitty kitty - and they all come running.

Sue



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post #7 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-25-2009, 04:05 PM
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Re: Becoming our parents

Up until a few years ago I was my Dad through and through, especially in my short temper (ask for my Mom's opinion on that! ) But I started noticing a lot of my Mom's "ways" coming through once I had my own kids. It's freaky! You know, you have those teenage years where you think "I'll never be like her" and then it happens, in the things you say and do.

I still have my Dad's short temper, though. That's the proud stubborn German in me!
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post #8 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-25-2009, 07:16 PM
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Re: Becoming our parents

I didn't mention that about me, did I? My father had a terrible temper, and it's a good thing I also inherited traits from both parents, because I have a short fuse. I control myself better, though, because I inherited patience from my mother.

I think I inherited my mother's soft heart and love for children. My mother wrote poetry as a hobby, and so do I...well, I write everything. And she played piano by ear. I became a musician and teacher of both music and English. Both of my parents loved animals, and although they allowed the cats outside, they wouldn't go to sleep until they found the cat and brought him in.

I wish my father had taught me more about working with wood. He was a carpenter/contractor, and I love wood, but I was just a gopher and all around helper. He was over 50 when I was born, so his was a totally different generation. What a shock to have an opinionated daughter. (like him!)




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post #9 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-25-2009, 07:26 PM
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Re: Becoming our parents

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeanie
My father had a terrible temper, and it's a good thing I also inherited traits from both parents, because I have a short fuse. I control myself better, though, because I inherited patience from my mother.
I am exactly the same.

Sincerely, Krystle.
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post #10 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-26-2009, 09:18 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Becoming our parents

I inherited my love of solitude and independence from my mother. Thank God, I did not inherit her temper or any of her side of the family's issues with controlling emotions. I have a bit too much control...I've had more people than I can count tell me they do things just to try to make me lose my cool. They have yet to succeed.


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