Witches are made of wood. - Cat Forum : Cat Discussion Forums
 
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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-10-2010, 11:54 AM Thread Starter
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Witches are made of wood.

A tribute to analytical thinking on the intertubes. Not here, not here. From another cat oriented place where someone claims socialism in Sweden is threatening marrige.

But I do hope this isn't deleted becasue someone is offended by the image of a burning witch.


B: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
V: BUUUURN!!!!! BUUUUUURRRRNN!!!!! You BURN them!!!! BURN!!
B: And what do you burn apart from witches?
Villager: More Witches!
Other Villager: Wood.
B: So. Why do witches burn?

(long silence)
(shuffling of feet by the villagers)

Villager: (tentatively) Because they're made of.....wood?
B: Goooood!
Other Villagers: oh yeah... oh....
B: So. How do we tell whether she is made of wood?
One Villager: Build a bridge out of 'er!
B: Aah. But can you not also make bridges out of stone?
Villagers: oh yeah. oh. umm...
B: Does wood sink in water?
One Villager: No! No, no, it floats!
Other Villager: Throw her into the pond!
Villagers: yaaaaaa!

(when order is restored)

B: What also floats in water?
Villager: Bread!
Another Villager: Apples!
Another Villager: Uh...very small rocks!
Another Villager: Cider!
Another Villager: Uh...great gravy!
Another Villager: Cherries!
Another Villager: Mud!
Another Villager: Churches! Churches!
Another Villager: Lead! Lead!
King Arthur: A Duck!
Villagers: (in amazement) ooooooh!
B: exACTly!
B: (to a villager) So, *logically*...

Villager: (very slowly, with pauses between each word) If...she...weighs the same as a duck......she's made of wood.
B: and therefore...

(pause)

Villager: A Witch!
All Villagers: A WITCH!
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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-10-2010, 01:49 PM
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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-10-2010, 01:56 PM
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-10-2010, 02:23 PM Thread Starter
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-10-2010, 03:39 PM
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