Should A Significant Other Have A Say So? - Cat Forum : Cat Discussion Forums
 
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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old 12-06-2012, 09:43 PM Thread Starter
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Should A Significant Other Have A Say So?

For those of you who have a SO living with you,do you consult with them before you bring in new animals or do you just bring the new animal home? I don't plan on bringing another cat home into the family,but my husband and I always have new foster dogs coming in.He loves the animals as much as I do,and I always mention to him what changes are going on with the dogs as far as who is getting adopted or who's coming in. I personally wouldn't be with someone who didn't at least like animals or expected me to not do rescue work. That's another thread though.
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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old 12-06-2012, 10:22 PM
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I don't live with a significant other but I do live with a very easygoing and pet oriented family.

I think anyone you live with deserves to be kept up to date on the animals coming and going in your house, which you share, and have a say in the matter; though admittedly if I lived with people that didn't want dogs and cats in the house as a bottom line then that simply wouldn't work out. Rescue work involves going the extra mile, so I can understand if that's less ok for some people that live in the household, but hopefully there's always compromise!

Right now we have no room for any more cats in this house. We have four. My aunt's cat in one room (aunt's on vacation, but when she stays overnight - frequently - the cat also stays in that room), Blaze (he sprays) in another, Jasper (semi-feral) in the garage, and Blacky getting the option to come and go through the house and outdoors (who we tamed from the outdoors and frankly, I didn't give anyone the option of if she was staying or not, it happened gradually enough anyway). Also two dogs. So... yes. No more room for animals here, honestly not a suitable extra room to keep a cat even if I wanted to. It's a bit like a zoo, keeping doors closed everywhere. If my family had said no to keeping Jasper in the garage to tame I'd have understood. Everyone has their own limits on number of animals they want in a home and amount of time and space required for those animals is a factor affecting everyone that lives under the same roof.


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Last edited by Carmel; 12-06-2012 at 10:26 PM.
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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old 12-06-2012, 10:24 PM
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absolutely.

it is a huge decision after all

and most shelters actually require all members of the household to visit the animal at least once and/or be present for the adoption


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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old 12-06-2012, 11:26 PM
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Well depends on the situation.... If you had pets before you met this SO then I would say no they don't get a say in what you do with them.... But if you met and then decided to get a pet then sure they get a say. Some of the people I dated in the past didn't like my cats and I gave them all the same response.... "Well that sucks for you then Hun cuz they were here before you "


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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old 12-07-2012, 02:18 PM
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If you are co-habitating then yes, they should be consulted about new pets brought in.
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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old 12-07-2012, 02:30 PM
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I think it would be disrespectful to bring in any new pets without letting the person/people you live with know first. Even if you are just fostering, even if you will be doing all the feeding/walking/cleaning, I think consulting any co-habitators about new animals is the right thing to do.

Zilla mentions pets being in the house first- I also think there is a big difference between existing pets and bringing in new ones.
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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old 12-09-2012, 03:00 PM
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For me It would allways be discussed. Maybe not if I brought home a gold fish. I do want a budgie but still that needs consideration. They are noisey.

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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old 12-09-2012, 04:38 PM
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Technically, I brought home all three cats without discussing it, but that's because two were abandoned in a field and the other was take or he was being left outside. However, it was a mutual decision on whether or not we kept them. I had already talking to my breeder about my second great dane puppy before we moved in together, so that was already established. We moved in together in march and puppy came home in may.


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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old 12-11-2012, 02:38 PM
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absolutely, I respect my husband and his opinions.

Before adopting our cats (I was the one who wanted to adopt cats) we discussed it as I didn't want to make decision without him agreeing to that. We live together, we share life, home and responsibilities together. But I have to admit, I was little pushy when he was skeptical about adopting cats at first


I guess the only time when I would bring animal home without discussing it with him first would be an emergency situation like taking home animal in need, i.e. dumped or injured, etc. But I would still give him a call first
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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old 12-15-2012, 08:14 PM
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My SO already knows I'm a package deal and is tolerant of my passion for cats. He said he would be willing to foster kittens but I'm sure I could talk him into any cat which needed my help as he is a softie. I know I could never be with someone who didn't love animals.
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