I just need to vent about my MIL again - UUGGGHHHH!!!!!
I absolutely despise this woman! We just got back from Minneapolis, as I mentioned earlier, and found out we're having a healthy boy AND a girl.
All my MIL said to my DH when she found out was "Oh goodie! Now you'll have a son." She never even mentioned the girl. Furthermore, she didn't care about the health issues. My DH had to bring it up. Another thing was that she never even bothered to say congratulations or ANYTHING to me about it at all. She hasn't even said so much the entire PG.
We got home very late Sunday night/early Monday morning so my DH decided to take Monday off so he could get some sleep. Then about 11 a.m. we get a call from a cousin of his who lives in Montana, about a 12-hour drive from us. She didn't even bother to let us know she was coming. She just called and said she was in town and asked if she could come over. All our luggage and the things we bought in Minneapolis were still sitting around the house and we hadn't gotten around to starting any laundry yet. So she comes over about 12:30 or so and visits for a bit and then goes over to my MIL's to see her for a bit.
Shortly after that my MIL called our house and said, "Well, since Darlene's in town you have to have everyone over for supper you know." This, of course, would include my MIL who is only looking for a free meal anyway! That's really the only reason she would want a get-together.
My DH told her how since I've gotten bigger (plus the fact that I was already in a wheelchair) it's a lot harder for me to get around and I wasn't going to cook a fancy meal for everybody (My DH's cousin also brought her adult son along). My MIL got ticked and said, "Well, she cooks for you!" and then DH told her that was because it's a lot easier to cook for 2 people and I don't have to be lifting heavy casseroles and such when there's only 2 of us. I've ended up doing a lot more simpler cooking lately because I can no longer reach where a lot of my nice casserole dishes are, etc. Also, I don't feel like we should have to cater to a couple of people who just decided to stop at our door one day completely by surprise. They could have had the courtesy to call ahead of time to at least let us know when they would be here.
So, DH told her we'll probably take them out to eat sometime while they're here and call it good. She didn't like that. We had so many fun things planned for this week now that we know that we're having 1 boy and 1 girl. Like, cleaning the walls in the nursery in preparation to paint, then painting and putting up wallpaper border, etc. My MIL said all of that is stupid and to just put them in the room the way it is. Bottom line is, if your plans don't suit her then she gets ticked.
To put the icing on the cake my DH called her tonight and told her that we have made plans with his cousin and her son to go out and eat tomorrow night. Then she starts off on a stupid tangent about, "Oh by the way, what color skin are the babies going to have?" See, I don't know if I ever mentioned but we had to use donor sperm. My MIL has it in her head that the sperm bank could have screwed up and sent the wrong guy's sperm, giving us "colored" (as SHE says it) kids. I darn near started to cry when I heard this. DH and I are Caucasian so we picked out a donor who also is Caucasian. The sperm banks are reputable and shouldn't screw up on something like that. Furthermore, if they did happen to send out the wrong specimen and we got children of a different race we really don't care. African-American, Chinese, Japanese - whatever. We'll love them just the same. It's only a skin color. Not only that, no matter what these babies look like they ARE half my DNA because they're my eggs.
She is SOOOOOO prejudice and I hate it! I actually believe that if something were messed up along the line and we got kids of any different race other than Caucasian she wouldn't regard them as her grandkids at all. It's sick, I know, but that's the way she is.
I don't know what else to do about this woman. It's already to the point where I NEVER say a word to her when she comes over here to see her son. She never has anything nice to say about ANY subject. She is the queen of negativity. We can't just up and move to get away from her. It's not that easy. We like the town that we live in and almost all of my family is within blocks or miles of us at the most. I don't want to move away from them. When these babies are here I know I'm going to need help now and then and my mom is only about 5 minutes away. She's going to be a great help. She would be devastated if we moved away after having babies.
Not only that, my mom is A LOT more trustworthy in the babysitting department than my MIL. They're about 20 years different in age and my MIL doesn't have a clue what's safe for a baby or not. A few years ago I had a rummage sale here at the house with a friend of mine who had a 3-month-old baby at the time. My MIL tried giving the baby a Happy Meal toy from McDonald's. HELLO! What's the first thing that a baby does when it gets something like that in it's hands? They shove it in their mouth. My DH saw this right away and took the toy away from the baby and my MIL yelled and him and told him to mind his own business. She will NEVER be allowed to be alone with these kids. She's proven that she can't be trusted. I'm also not letting my children be exposed to her negative attitude all the time either. Kids pick up on things like that. I don't want my kids running around spouting off her wacky ideas about things.
Whew! OK, I'm taking a deep breath now and relaxing more. It just helps to get that out before I let my blood pressure spike. Thanks for listening.