Relationship Help? - Cat Forum : Cat Discussion Forums
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post #1 of 11 (permalink) Old 12-17-2005, 03:56 AM Thread Starter
 
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Relationship Help?

Has anyone here had/have their heart emotionally torn between two guys? I'm confused on what to do next.

The guy I've been madly in love with for 2 years finally wants to hook up, but I've been talking to another guy for less then 6 months but he's really sweet. I don't know what to do.

Anyone got any advice?
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post #2 of 11 (permalink) Old 12-17-2005, 09:26 AM
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I say keep 'em both. What the other doesn't know won't hurt them....j/k. I'm so bad
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post #3 of 11 (permalink) Old 12-17-2005, 09:34 AM
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I think everyone has been there at least once. You've got to make a decision, and it's not going to be easy, no matter what you choose. Nobody else can presume to make the decision for you.

Me, I'd go with the one I'd been after for two years, unless there's something ridiculously special about the other guy. Gotta follow the heart.
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post #4 of 11 (permalink) Old 12-17-2005, 11:39 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aphrodeia
Me, I'd go with the one I'd been after for two years, unless there's something ridiculously special about the other guy. Gotta follow the heart.
I'd go with that one...had to make that choice once and I followed my heart...and now 5 1/2 years later, I'm glad I made that decision.
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post #5 of 11 (permalink) Old 12-17-2005, 07:29 PM
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why not casually date both of them for a little while, maybe two dates or so, then make a choice
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post #6 of 11 (permalink) Old 12-17-2005, 11:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cassandra
why not casually date both of them for a little while, maybe two dates or so, then make a choice
It is not always that simple. It may often take more than two dates to find out if you truly like a person or not.

Now this is from a man's perspective. If I am torn between two women, this is how I know which is right for me. Woman A will want to have sex on the first date or so. Woman B is coming off a bad relationship and does not wish to get intimate with any guy for the time being. Yet I would much rather be with Woman B. So if a guy would much rather spend time with a woman who is not ready vs one that will sleep with them after one date, then it is obvious who a man TRULY cares about here. And it is THAT woman who he should choose. After all, it is a case of personality and woman B has the right personality for me.

So in your case, how does their personality stack up? Who do you laugh with the most? Which one do you think about the most? Who makes you feel most at ease? Who is easier to talk to? If both were standing next to each other, who would you go to?

But as others have said, merely follow your heart.
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post #7 of 11 (permalink) Old 12-18-2005, 08:55 AM
 
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The one you've been madly in love with for 2 years, why was it not right for him in the past?
On the surface, I'd say go with the one you've been interested in for so long, BUT some people are only interested in someone else when they are with someone else and you should avoid that!
So, if man A has known you for 2 years and is now interested in you because he sees you with man B, stay away from man A!
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post #8 of 11 (permalink) Old 12-18-2005, 12:37 PM
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There must be some reason why you are not picking the guy who you've been with for 2 years. I was torn between two guys a few years ago and I had a bf for 3 years at that time and a friend who I didn't know liked me! I left my bf because we were having so many problems but I did love that guy with my all but I knew I couldn't have stayed with him because we have been trying to work out our problems but it wasn't working. I'm now glad that I did break up with him because now that I'm not in love with him, I see everything clearly, he has no ambition, financially very unstable, at 30 yrs old still lives with parents, etc etc.

Just think why you'd stay with one and not the other.
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post #9 of 11 (permalink) Old 12-18-2005, 02:19 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by badet
There must be some reason why you are not picking the guy who you've been with for 2 years. I was torn between two guys a few years ago and I had a bf for 3 years at that time and a friend who I didn't know liked me! I left my bf because we were having so many problems but I did love that guy with my all but I knew I couldn't have stayed with him because we have been trying to work out our problems but it wasn't working. I'm now glad that I did break up with him because now that I'm not in love with him, I see everything clearly, he has no ambition, financially very unstable, at 30 yrs old still lives with parents, etc etc.

Just think why you'd stay with one and not the other.
Definitely stepping back from the situation and looking at it logically helps. I'm not saying ignore your heart...but sometimes you have to listen to your brain, too.
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post #10 of 11 (permalink) Old 12-18-2005, 03:19 PM
 
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well you said you were madly in love with the first guy...so i guess that settles it...right?
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