Of course we shouldn't "blame" the victim. However, if I saw a child in a dangerous situation, I think it's my duty as a mother and a teacher to help that child to get out of it. The middle school students don't think in an adult way. They're in the most confusing time of their lives. They make bad choices that could and do give predators the wrong impression. They want to give the impression that they are older and sexy.
I remember that when my mother warned me about walking down dark streets alone, I'd say, in that condescending tone young people often use, "Oh, Mom!!!" We know that young people believe they are invulnerable. That's why I think parents should supervise the use of computers.
In addition, I hope there will be a way to lock out some sites (if there isn't, already), as there is on cable tv. My kids are out of the nest now, so I might be behind the times, as far as that type of technology is concerned. Come to think of it, there is. Businesses lock out IM and games now.
I would also make my daughter change if she was dressed inappropriately. Old fashioned or not, I'd rather have a safe child, even if I had to put some restrictions on her privileges. We know they're not safe; they're sure they are!
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A dog, I have always said, is prose; a cat is a poem. ~Jean Burden