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post #1 of 35 (permalink) Old 04-23-2006, 02:38 PM Thread Starter
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Problems

Hi Everyone, I'm having a bit of a problem im hoping to get some advice on. My boyfriend and I have been living together by ourselfs for a year now and have been going out for about 6 years. It was so nice to finally have our own place.

Next month my boyfriend is taking a work contract out of town for 4 months. During which time his sister "asked" to live with me. I say it like that becuase she is the kind of person who thinks that everyone will do stuff for her without asking. Me and her get along ok on short term basis, but she is a nightmare to live with. Very messy, comming and going all hours of the night and always seems to be in a bad mood 24 hours a day. So I really don't want her living with me. Besides the fact that I have gotten used to having my own place and not having to share.

So the question is do I say no she cant live with me and deal with my boyfriends parents potentially being pissed at me? Or do I put up with it for 4 months?

Thanks All!


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post #2 of 35 (permalink) Old 04-23-2006, 02:44 PM
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Will she be paying rent?
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post #3 of 35 (permalink) Old 04-23-2006, 02:49 PM
 
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hang on its your house you have what say on who come and goes, put your foot down say no!!
your place your rules, his parents aint paying your mortgage so sod them. your new house isnt a doss for his family or mates. its your love nest it shouldnt be invaded.
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post #4 of 35 (permalink) Old 04-23-2006, 02:51 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Immortal
hang on its your house you have what say on who come and goes, put your foot down say no!!
your place your rules, his parents aint paying your mortgage so sod them. your new house isnt a doss for his family or mates. its your love nest it shouldnt be invaded.
I agree. It's better dealing with parents being angry over something stupid than to have to deal with that stuff for months.
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post #5 of 35 (permalink) Old 04-23-2006, 03:00 PM
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True....and if she doesn't pay rent because of her "family" status and you try to evict someone you live with, you and your cat's life could be endangered. If she doesn't appreciate what you do from the very beginning, there is no way for her to appreciate as time goes on. People just don't magically increase their appreciation on how hard other people try to help them. She would take your help for granted. When finally the time comes for her to move out, she could be angry. Anger would turn to resentment, which is an extremely dangerous thing.


That is the worst case scenario.
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post #6 of 35 (permalink) Old 04-23-2006, 03:02 PM Thread Starter
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Rent was never discussed. I feel bad in one sense because I know she has no where else to go. And this would start in May. Not giving her much time to find somewhere else to go. But on the other sense, I shouldn't have to put up with being uncomfortable for that long. And the reason she has no where else to go is because all of the other roommates she had would never live with her again. I don't like how she and my b/f's parrents assumed I would say yes to her living with me.


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post #7 of 35 (permalink) Old 04-23-2006, 03:05 PM
 
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If she has nowhere else to go, how about her parents take her in rather than being angry that you won't rearrange your life for her?
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post #8 of 35 (permalink) Old 04-23-2006, 03:05 PM
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If she has nowhere else to go right now....what makes you think she would magically find the purpose of her life? Her life would be incredibly comfortable......an apartment.....no rent......someone to constantly clean up after her.....nobody to criticize her due to her "family" status.....people think you are heartless and non-Christian for trying to evict her.....she orders the most expensive TV, the most expensive internet, takes hour-long showers, eats all of your food with her friends, set the AC to 60 degrees due to her obesity, significantly increases your living expenses, evict your cat, not let you sleep for more than three hours at a time by having intimate relationships right next to you.

Sorry, but giving her welfare for being down is no answer. People should be responsible for themselves. What makes you think she would move after she moves in? She would more likely than not not pay any rent at all....which would put a strain on your relationship with your boyfriend. Her life would be wonderful. Your life would be ****.

Don't do that. I barely survived such things myself. I would gladly trade twenty years of my life for such things to never have happened, but it did.
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post #9 of 35 (permalink) Old 04-23-2006, 03:10 PM Thread Starter
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Her parents live 4 hours away in an small community and she is comming to the big city to finish school. shengmei makes sense. Im afraid that she will get too comfortable and try and stay even longer. She plays the family card all the time. She knows that im too nice to say anything about how much mess she makes around the house. We only have a two bedroom house thats really small. I don't want to have to live my life around her schedule when its my house.

I know my boyfriends parents will be angry about it. They will think that im putting her out on the street and putting them in a bind to have to pay for her rent somewhere else.


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post #10 of 35 (permalink) Old 04-23-2006, 03:12 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by akstacey88
I know my boyfriends parents will be angry about it. They will think that im putting her out on the street and putting them in a bind to have to pay for her rent somewhere else.
Yes, well THEY had her...not you...it's THEIR responsiblity, in my opinion. I hope you don't get to much crap from them because you turn her down.
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