Razzle-4/95 thru 7/25/2012 - Cat Forum : Cat Discussion Forums
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post #1 of 21 (permalink) Old 07-28-2012, 06:01 PM Thread Starter
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Razzle-4/95 thru 7/25/2012

This is so hard to write. I've been dreading writing this for 2 years since he was diagnosed with kidney failure. If love could of saved you, you never would of died. He is the best cat i ever had. It was aweful when i had to PTS. I put him in a woven basket and he freaked in the car. I had to hold him down but he was so weak he hardly faught me. At the vets they asked if i wanted to be with him. Yes. He was with me for 17 years of love. I had to be there for him as he had been there for me. He literally saved my life. The tech came in and i said i think he died, but he wasn't quite yet. He gasped for breath. She asked if i wanted to wait for the vet. No. Do it. Do it right now. It broke my heart to see him suffer like this and to see him gasping. The trip to the vet's did him in, but he was going to die anyway. I wished i had called the traveling vet and had it done at home. Afterwards i said i wanted some of his fur and the vet tech came in with the shaver. I said not now i'm too upset and i don't want to see you do this. I held him for a few minetues and told him i love you. I'll love you forever. I always told him love you, love you always. I'm so heart broken. It feels like someone stabbed me in the heart. He's left pawprints on my heart.

He was the best. He never bite or scratched me. He had the greatest personality. He never, and i mean never, did anything wrong. He was the perfect cat and that makes it so harder to lose him. He put up with my constant kisses on his cute, little rubber nose because i loved him so much. I'm sorry if i made you suffer. I didn't know.

I blame the vet in a way. I don't know if it would of made a difference or not. After his 2nd day of dialysis he rubbed his body against the vet. Something he never did so i think he felt kind of good. The mistake the vets made was not putting him on sub-q fluids when he came home until 4 days later but by then it was too late. He was just miserable and laying around waiting to die. I'm switching vets. They just didn't know anything about kidney disease which seems hard to imagine since they work with dogs and cats. Also all they thought about was the money. I've been with them since 1983. Now they are history.

Geets seems to be doing ok. He knew Razzle was dying.

I miss my boy so much and later i will post a memorial of him. I just can't do it right now because i'm so upset. I cry everyday for him. I miss you my baby boy and i'm sorry if i made you suffer and even though it was so hard to be there for you at the end, i'm glad i was there for you.

RIP Kathy
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post #2 of 21 (permalink) Old 07-28-2012, 06:13 PM
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Kathy,
My heart breaks for you. Razzle sounds like he was a wonderful little guy. Some day, not soon, but some day, you will start to remember all of his wonderful little quirks and a smile will be in your heart.

You were there with him and let him go free when he needed to leave you. That is the hardest thing for us and the best thing for them.
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post #3 of 21 (permalink) Old 07-28-2012, 06:23 PM
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Wow my heart goes out to you. Im so so sorry. He sounds like he was your heart cat. I know you had a wonderful life together. Please don't second guess yourself of how you could of done it better. You are a wiser cat person because of Razzle and your other cats will benefit. He is with you now in spirit. He hasn't left you. I hope all the happy memories heal your broken heart.


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post #4 of 21 (permalink) Old 07-28-2012, 07:57 PM
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Kathy, I'm so sorry for your pain and your loss. Just never forget the good life you
gave Razzle and all the wonderful years you had together. You were showing your
love for him by letting him go and not letting him suffer anymore.

I had to make the same decisions for two of my cats and for both my husband and son.......
your pain is natural and completely normal because of your love for Razzle. Sending comforting
hugs to you.....Phyllis


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post #5 of 21 (permalink) Old 07-28-2012, 09:36 PM
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Kathy, I am so sorry for your loss of Razzle. I really don't know what to say at times like this. Words can comfort only so much after a loss like this. My heart is breaking for you. You did everything you could for him and he knew love because of you. Remember the beautiful and funny times you shared. Hugs to you.
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post #6 of 21 (permalink) Old 07-28-2012, 11:02 PM
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My heart breaks for you............I know this pain all to well. This november 2 days before thanksgiving will be two years since my Mr. Sophie past away and it still breaks my heart and forever will. My girls kept asking me what I wanted for Christmas the year he passed and I didn't want anything because nothing really mattered; my heart was shattered. But then it came to me and I'm glad it did. I asked for a locket with his name on it. I wear it everyday and never really take it off. This way I carry him with me always.. The inscription on the back says, "love you always". And it is very special. I clasp it in my hands when I talk to him and it makes me feel close to him. Maybe you could have something like this as well. He was my baby, my heart; and now he lays right next to it everyday. Many, many hugs and prayers for you.
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post #7 of 21 (permalink) Old 07-29-2012, 09:42 AM
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I'm so sorry. Just know Razzle isn't suffering...he is free. A locket for him sounds wonderful idea. My heart goes out to you.
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post #8 of 21 (permalink) Old 07-29-2012, 10:37 AM
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hugs and kisses for both you and razzle, kathy. he is at peace now and you were the greatest friend to him for his entire life filled with wonderful, loving memories. remember all the happy times and know that he is waiting for you at the rainbow bridge.
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post #9 of 21 (permalink) Old 07-29-2012, 12:27 PM Thread Starter
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Thanks everyone for your words of wisdom and sympathy. That's all i can say because i'm crying for my baby.

Kathy
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post #10 of 21 (permalink) Old 07-29-2012, 01:59 PM
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You should cry - you need to - it's part of healing. You will never stop loving him, never stop missing him but never forget that you gave to him jut as much as he gave to you - right to the end. You will meet again.
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