When I was a kid I wanted a kitten so badly, there weren't any that time of year and I was a very specific kid, I'd wanted an orange one! A lady called about some feral kittens she had, one of them being orange. As soon as she brought him to our house it was a done deal, I couldn't say no to his terrified little face. Blaze was always spooked of new places, strangers and loud noises. However, at home with his family he'd talk your ear off in "conversation" and loved playing games. He used to run around the condo making so much noise he sounded like a horse galloping about. His two favorite games were the laser pen, which he'd chase and chatter at endlessly, and hide and seek, where he'd animatedly meow once he found me hidden behind a door. If you so much as looked at him he'd flop over, he was a goof. He would follow me around from room to room and was always eager to sit on my lap like it was the best place in the world. He loved his family, and we loved him.
I haven't spoken about it in too much detail on the forum, but Blaze had been going downhill the last year, losing a lot of weight and drinking in the extreme, especially the last few months. Today and yesterday all he wanted to do was drink water. It was becoming a major challenge to get him to eat and as of last week he began refusing the majority of different foods I had bought for him along with every single food trick I knew. He threw up the little bit of tuna he did eat last night, and wasn't even that interested in Temptations. I couldn't have him living like that any longer... it would have been for my sake and not his, he was in distress.
I didn't want to try any heroics at his age -- roughly three months away from 18. I let him walk around the yard for about 15 minutes and then took him in. I'd wanted to do it at home but I couldn't find anyone short notice and as it turns out, he was not him self to the point of not particularly caring that he was in a strange environment with strange people. I was with him and watched it happen, I told him that I loved him and that he was a good boy... I've never been there before as a beloved pet dies, this is the first pet I've lost as an adult. It's been a very long time since I've experienced the loss of a pet, I forgot how hard it is. He's been a part of the family over half my life.
The vet and staff were very kind. It was over so fast, afterward the vet said something like "Just like that his light has left the world, but he'll always be in your heart." and that sums it up very well.
I'll always love and miss you, baby Blaze.
A picture of him as a kitten (I can't find it right now to scan properly):
A picture that always made me smile because I have no idea how he got underneath the pillow, never mind why he stayed with it like that as he slept:
Here's one of the most recent pictures of him, and probably one of the better ones. This was taken less than a month ago:
I'm not particularly religious... at all, but I will share this:
Everything remains exactly as it was. I am I, and you are you, and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged. Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. Life means all it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was. Death is inevitable, so why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just round the corner. Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost. One brief moment and all will be as it was before. All is well.
- Canon Henry Scott Holland, 'All is Well' excerpt