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post #1 of 11 (permalink) Old 03-18-2015, 12:14 PM Thread Starter
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Lost my friends cat

my friend's cat passed away today after a big fight with calici virus which causes drooling, ulcers, sneezing etc. The cat would not eat and drink so I tried to help out with critical care canned food blended and water at the intervals the vet suggested. When I found the kitty she was so dehydrated that her scruff was sticking up and she would barely stand. She was 4lbs when she was ideally supposed to be at 8. I was wanting to work another miracle but I think the cat was too far gone to save to begin with. Unfortunately they did not have the financial means for intravenous fluids which I suggested as a final ditch effort. I remember the vet saying that subcutaneous fluids would not absorb most of the one in a severe case so I think that is why our hydration attempts were not working. I have saved many cats that have had uri, sometimes staying up all night to save them using the method I used, so I am so upset I failed my friend and this cat. It will take me a while to get over losing this one since it was more personal...and hope he forgives me.
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post #2 of 11 (permalink) Old 03-18-2015, 12:24 PM
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You didn't *lose* your friend's cat. It died of an infectious disease that it picked up somewhere. It must have had access to other infected cats and must have been like that for at least some time before you were brought into the equation.

IMO, it sounds more like your friend failed his pet.. not that you failed your friend. It should have been taken to a vet as soon as the first symptoms appeared.

You were a hero who tried to do everything possible to help this poor cat. It must have been in terrible pain at the end and the result was a blessing, imo. It's finally free of pain and over the bridge running free.
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post #3 of 11 (permalink) Old 03-18-2015, 12:34 PM
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I think you did everything humanly possible, too. We can't save any kitty that has been left too long to the state this kitty sounds like she was. Finances are a big thing with pet owners, so I understand a lot people have this issue, but it's still very hard to hear. Wish there had been a better outcome for this kitty and your friend was in a better position to do something earlier. If your friend gets upset at you, realize he/she may be upset at him/herself first. It could be part of the grieving process.
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post #4 of 11 (permalink) Old 03-18-2015, 12:51 PM
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Hey Zach, good to see you again, sorry it's under such bad circumstances. You did what you could to help the little cat, which was much more than your friend would have done without your help. No one believes you failed him. Calici can be really difficult once it takes hold.

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post #5 of 11 (permalink) Old 03-18-2015, 12:54 PM
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I am sure you feel defeated but a friend should know that you did everything you could to save a dying cat. You replaced the vet because of lack of funds and even the vet may not have been able to save the cat. At least you gave the cat it's last chance. I am so sorry for you and your friend.
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post #6 of 11 (permalink) Old 03-18-2015, 01:00 PM
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It's very hard to lose any animal but you did everything you could under extremely difficult circumstances. You tried your absolute best but your friend needed to get his cat to a vet or ask for help earlier. Try not to beat yourself up about this. I am sorry for the loss
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post #7 of 11 (permalink) Old 03-18-2015, 02:16 PM
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Zach, as others have said, you did as much as you could possibly do for the poor kitty..
You went above and beyond what anyone else would have done.
Unfortunately, we cannot save all animals, and people too.

I am sure you comforted and loved this kitty. That is what is important. The poor thing knew you were trying your best, which was out of love for her.

I have not dealt with calci virus, but I know it is tuff. Treatment should have begun at the first signs, as any other disease. Cali virus is very different from an URI; especially with ulcers~~~ this was on going for a long time before medical help was started.

She was 4 lbs when you saw her. That is such a tiny cat. She was really sick..You tried your best.

Please do not beat yourself up over this. Yes, you are upset, that means you are a very caring person. Please do not over dwell on this. You did your best.

Your friend should not be mad at you.. If he is, then he is not much of a friend.. He should be grateful to you for trying to help what was a very dire medical circumstance.....

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post #8 of 11 (permalink) Old 03-18-2015, 02:58 PM
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Oh Zach,
I'm so sorry:'( I know you hurt...because you are one of the ones, who truly has a beautiful spirit, and a generous one...

This poor little cat was just to far gone, to begin with, perhaps if she could have been seen by a vet, early on, the outcome 'might' have been different...

Don't beat yourself up, you did so much more, trying to help her, than her owner was willing to do...

It is my hope, that this tragedy, will wake your friend up to, what the responsibilities are, of a Good Pet Parent...so it doesn't happen again.

"A Cat must have three different names:
An everyday family name; A particular name;
And the name but the Cat Himself Knows, and will never confess." T.S. Eliot

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post #9 of 11 (permalink) Old 03-19-2015, 12:47 AM
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Oh, I'm sorry about the kitty. I know you feel like you failed because the kitty didn't make it, but some of them won't make it no matter how hard you try. The important thing is that you tried. And the kitty knew someone was trying to help her. Poor little thing.
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post #10 of 11 (permalink) Old 03-19-2015, 01:48 PM
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ditto what everyone else has said. sounds like you've done more than your share of saving sick kitites and the ones who have slipped away were for reasons beyond your control. thank you for all you do!
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