As some of you may know from MowMow's FB page... my sweet angel blossom bloomed and went over the bridge. He's now a full fledged angel.
On Thursday night I got home from work and he was lethargic and uncomfortable. Friday morning his appetite started to wane. We went to the vet Saturday morning and I'm very thankful to a vet who was very to the point. We could do blood tests, ultrasounds, and exams but he's been living with end stage renal for over a year now and that perhaps it may be time to make some decisions.
I've been thinking that for some time but I really needed that ...permission... to make the final decision. They gave him fluids to make him a bit more comfortable and I took him home for the night to think about it. In the past he's rallied significantly after Sub Q and I really thought he might again.
He didn't. He napped with me for a while then crawled into the crate for hours, wanting to be alone. That's very unlike my boy. When he's ill he wants me to hold him and baby him. Now he just wanted to be alone.
He did join me later in bed and I got to spend his last hours cuddling him and kissing him. He still hadn't eaten since Thursday and all he wanted was massive amounts of water (without urinating). I knew it was time. I gave him kisses and held him and explained all about what was going to happen the next day. I explained the catheter in his leg would hurt but I would be there and the passing itself wouldn't hurt him. He would just go to sleep with me holding him, just like we did almost every night for the past 11 years.
I called my best friend who was awesome to drive an hour round trip to go with me and drive so I wouldn't have to drive home myself. She dealt with her crazy bad cat allergies to sit with me the entire time we were at the vets and then stopped by the grocery store to buy me a giant tub of Rocky Road on the way home.
My sweet boy went so peacefully with me holding him and telling him what I told him every single night at bed time. That I loved him more than the sun, more than the moon, and more than all the stars in the sky combined. I reminded him to wait for me at the bridge and that I'd be looking for him when I got there.
I lost an angel blossom, but he bloomed and heaven gained a cranky little curmudgeon angel that will rule the whole place with a velvet paw.
I am so sorry to hear about Mow Mow. I always thought he was a special cat and so handsome. I can't come up with flowery words but I know that you were the best cat mama for him and he had a good life with you. He is probably scampering around now loving feeling so well.
Thanks all for the good thoughts. He was definitely one of a kind. Saturday, Sunday, and Monday were rough but I'm not doing the ugly cry any longer I'm taking great comfort in the fact that i was there with him and holding him while he went so peacefully.
Book and Neelix have been amazing. THe first two days one or the other (or both) were not just with me, but touching me. I woke up during the first night and in my groggy state forgot he was gone. I called MowMow since he wasn't sleeping against my face and a few seconds later Neelix showed up purring and giving me nose licks.
I miss MowMOw's face mashes and snuffling at his fur, but we are all getting into a new rhythm. The boys sleep on either side of me at night and they are loving the freedom of having run of the full apartment and splitting the considerable attention that I always had to devote to MowMow.
Oh my! That's a very fancy box! The ones I have are carved wood, both the same although years apart. From one box I scattered some of the ashes on the former owner's grave and then some on the companion cat's grave. From the second box I scattered some out in the yard, for that cat was semi-feral and I knew he'd be freaked to be indoors all the time.
Crazy. But comforting. Hope having MowMow at home is a comfort to you. Geez, just writing about the ashes has made me cry *again*. Sigh.
What a beautiful boy he was! Love your very wonderful tribute to him.....he will be waiting for you.
"There are no ordinary cats.";"Time spent with a cat is never wasted."~ Colette
"A loving cat can mend a wounded heart." ~ Unknown Author
Alkitotle aka "Alkee", "Lambie" (July 2/04 - Oct. 2/15) -- white Devon Rex
in avatar. "Always in my heart."