I don't like cats.
2 cats that have lived in our building for years decided I could make a good provider, and even if I never liked cats nor had any inclination to feed that pest, I found myself being a strays' mommy. I wouldn't disappoint anyone, even a cat, so shaking the responsibility they gave me was out of question. All I did was toss a half-sausage that I didn't like on the cement floor - 3 months ago. As I write, one of them is strolling in the sun, the other is on its own storey, downstairs where no one ever goes, on her own couch which the Super put there for them, on my father's velvety cushion covered with a brand-new, never-used-before fleece blanket I had reserved for some eventual special use, eating a can of cat gourmet seafood delicacy and hesitating whether to go back outside in the sun or take a nap on her couch first. The poor stray...
And I don't like cats.
Last night she kept me awake till 2 pm going downstairs every hour to try and convince her to come into her bedroom because it's cool outside the building on the roofs. She totally refused, so after the 5th time I said "I don't like cats anyway", and left her on the roofs. I even didn't leave her any warm milk for the night in case of sleepnessness. That's how pissed I was that she'd make me worry all night whether she was too cold outside and had regretted not coming in. Last night I was tough. And I don't like cats.
The Super asked me to take care of a cat colony that we have downstairs in the garden. I said "no way, I don't like cats". Which is how last night, after 2 months of feeding, watering, naming, playing, TNR attempts of the few un-neutered ones, attention lavishing for hours each day, using my food money to buy their food, carrying bags of food and bottles of water to and fro, hours of petting on my lap, roll-calling each day and looking out for the ones I haven't seen in over 2 feedings, I find myself the mommy of 25 strays, who decided that even if I don't like cats, I would do.
I don't care about cats.
So I decided to quit. Which is why last night I neglected them and for their weekly delicatessen feast I bought them no chicken, brought no milk or delicatessen, just mixed 2 cans of wet food (rabbit flavor) with a can of tuna fish, sliced in some leftover hotdogs and spoon-fed each of them individually(otherwise the dominant ones get all the food). And this morning when I came to wish them a good day, I brought no food whatsoever, no treats, not even a bit of milk, thinking their stomachs must get a rest from last night's feast.
I don't know the first thing about being a cat colony manager. How do I prevent the doves eating their food? How do I prevent the (neutered) territorial ones scaring off the timid, hungry sweethearts who don't deserve it? How do I get the friendliest one to let me caress his paw, which he totally refuses to let me do? How do I get the pregnant one to sit on the soft pink blanket I brought her rather than on the hard, cold concrete? I feel depressed and a failure at the task I've been entrusted with.
Any advice will be more than appreciated!