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post #1 of 4 (permalink) Old 05-19-2011, 07:27 PM Thread Starter
WetLunGz's Avatar
Join Date: May 2011
Location: bay area, ca
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my relationship with cats.

I have recently decided I would like a cat. At my last job we had a store cat named Bernie. He was really cool and sparked my interest in cats. He was atleast 15 yrs old when I started working there but he still had sum energy left. I used to toss treats on the ground and he would chase them. He would alwyas jump on computer desk and sleep right on the keyboard so you would pet him, and he even liked a good chase. He was fun cat.
In december, I moved in with my gf, and her cat moved in with us. In a span maybe 4 weeks, the cat moved from my gfs mom house in canada, down to my gf grandparents house in california, and then to our new apt just a few minutes away. At first she was rly scared and stayed mostly under the bed, ventuirng out to eat,litter, or at night when we got in bed. She tended to be very shy/anxoius/afriad around me so I tried to give her space. This is my first time living with a cat (Connie), and I have since made some mistaks and have learned from them. Bernie used to like a good chase, connie does not, she was scared of me for another week or so after that she relaxed again and wud sit on my lap almost everyday. One day I picked her up and was taking her into other room whne she started smelling my nose, then she bit it, I dropped her yelled no and stomped once to scare her. She was scared of again for a week or so. Then she was comfortable again, she bit my nose one more time, now my nose stays far away from her face. Recently though she has become scared of me again and I'm not sure why. She doesn't like to play, sdhe doesn't like to pet much, she seems to enjoy catnip,catnaps,staring out windowm and sleeping in the closet. I now want a second cat for myself because I would like the company, and maybe it ncould help connie relax around me and house guest. Any thoughts?
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post #2 of 4 (permalink) Old 05-20-2011, 03:48 AM
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I am not sure about the nose biting but I have had many a shy cat and the only help is patience. Moving as much as she has can be traumatic, especially if she was already a shy cat. You have to be patient and let her figure it out on her own.

I recommend to give her space. If she sits in your lap just pet her as much as she is comfortable with, and keep your nose away from her if that's what she bites! Reacting harshly is likely to scare her, and if you pull away quickly if she snaps or swipes at you the movement will only attract her attention.

Of course if your girl is able to care for Connie and give her the attention she needs and you would like another cat of your own I see no problem with that.

I recommend spending some time with prospective cats to get to know them. I like to go to shelters and sit down and see who comes over. This can be overwhelming for someone who isn't used to it though, as you may quickly be covered in cats!

Cats, like people, all have their own personalities and while it sounds like Connie isn't your type of cat there may be one out there that is. As long as your girl is able to give Connie the love and attention she needs, of course. The new cat may or may not get along with Connie. Introduce them slowly and make sure Connie has places she can go where she can feel safe until they are used to each other.

Also read up on quarantining. You shouldn't put them together right away. Just know that the new cat is for you and not Connie. There is never a guarantee that two pets will be buddies.
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post #3 of 4 (permalink) Old 05-20-2011, 09:14 AM
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Location: Virginia
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I kind of feel like you should work harder on your relationship with Connie before you give up and add another cat to what sounds like an already-stressful situation.

"I love cats because I enjoy my home and, little by little, they become its visible soul."--Jean Cocteau
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post #4 of 4 (permalink) Old 05-21-2011, 03:33 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by madamefifi View Post
I kind of feel like you should work harder on your relationship with Connie before you give up and add another cat to what sounds like an already-stressful situation.
yeah I think ur right, just today I bout her a lil wiinodw ledge and made her a little ledge above tghat to jump on, and I'm plannin on making more. I've been doing a lot of reading and I'm noticing cats like to be up high, well we didn't have many spots for her to perch so I'm hoping to add even more. Also she doesn't like playing. My gf cqn sometimes get her to plY for 5 or 10 minutes but I can only sometimes get her ro play. Will see, ibe been givin her her space and she sems less jumpy but it realy sux that she sbows no love for me. Anywaus thanks for both responses, hopefully I get a job soon and can afford to save a cat of my own
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