Should I visit my cat?
Well I am gonna do my best to make this very long story as short as I can.
I am norwegian and my husband is british. We bought a house together in Norway in 2010. A few months after we bought the house a cat turned up. I always used to throw food scraps out the window for the birds and one day when I went outside there was a little black cat sitting on the steps, when she saw me she meowed wildly and ran straight to the window where I threw the food and sat dowm, there was no food left! Turned out her old owner first kicked her out in the middle of winter and then later moved without her. We took her in, took her to the vet and had her sterilized and checked out. She lived with us from then on.
Anyway in January this year my husband said he couldnt handle living in Norway anymore for several reasons there is no need to get in to here. A month later he was back in England. In march we decided that I should come to England for a couple of weeks to see if I liked it and wanted to live there. Lots of to and from to England and in June I ended up moving to the UK with him.
The house in Norway is rented out to my aunt and her fiance. They agreed to let the cat live there as before and look after her. But the last few weeks I have come to the realization that this is all wrong for me. I miss my cat so much. The bond we have was stronger than anything I have ever had with any other pet (and most people). I am so homesick and every hour of every day I think about the cat and worry about her.
Its impossible to bring her to England at this point because strict rules on bringing pets between the countries, the cost of it and we arent even allowed to have pets in the building and we live in the middle of a city. While kitty is a country girl and she has endless fields and a huge forest she is used to running around in right outside her house in Norway. Even if I could I dont think it would be fair on her to bring her here. And if she ran off or got hurt I would never forgive myself. Ok so this ended up being very long anyway, but here are the questions I have.
I will be going to Norway for 2 weeks now in September. Im thinking it would be very unfair and also make it worse for the cat if I went to visit her and then disappear again. It will hurt me even more to not see her since I will only be 5 minutes away from her, but my thoughts are that its best for her if I stay away since Im leaving again so soon. Wont it just make her start looking for me again?
Does anyone have any insight on how cats might think and feel? It has been almost 3 months since I saw her and I am just so worried that she is looking for me and missing me as much as I miss her. I am trying to tell myself that this isnt the case, but I guess I cant quite convince myself.
I am also worried that I will lose the bond I have with her. I have had to leave her and come back so many times because of hospitalization, but then my husband was with her and I came home every weekend as well, and yes she missed me and looked for me in the weeks, but it all worked out well in the end. I am so homesick that I know I will move back to Norway, but it might be a year or more until I can leave. I am just so worried she will have given up on me by then and moved on.
I feel quite silly crying over that cat almost every day lately, but I just love her so much and what worries me is how attached she was to me. She followed me everywhere and would not let me out of her sight when I was home. I couldnt even go to the bathroom without her scraping on the door and meowing. She has had a tough life and she deserves the best and if I could I would drop everything and go back to her right now, but its just not possible. So here I am and there she is.
Someone please tell me that she is doing better than I am lol. And should I go see her when I am in Norway?
Im really sorry this is so long, but I have been carrying my worries alone for so long. There isnt really anyone I can talk to what would even begin to understand or even care.