[Mandee]

I have three cats currently. Two are over 5 years old, and I've had them since they were very small. The third is only about a year and a half old, unfixed female. My fiancee and I got her together when she was only a few weeks old.

My questions are regarding the baby, Gidgit.

First, she is utterly petrified of my fiancee, Mike. She will run and hide when he's in the house, and will not come out until she's sure he's gone. She will not let him touch her or even look at her. I don't understand why. Mike wouldn't hurt her in any way and has never done anything that I know of to make her so afraid of him. The other two cats love Mike and are fine around him. What could be causing this fear?

Secondly, Gidgit is like a dog when it comes to her eating behavior. She'll eat nearly everything. Though I know it's not healthy, I do tend to give her "table food" once and awhile. Recently she's been snatching some sun chips from the desk while I'm eating them. (these are baked potato chips) She will jump up onto my lap and sneakily snatch one off the plate and take it back down to the floor and munch it down.

I don't know why she eats everything from potato chips to bread to pop corn and find it very strange. Is it normal? Will any of these normal people foods hurt her? I know on a regular basis it probably would, but once and awhile? And is this even normal for a cat to be eating potato chips?

Thank you all very much for your help!

 

[Wayne]

The fact that Gidget runs from your fiancee, could indicate something about him that she doesn't like. Sometimes a cat or dog, for that matter, may have experienced a traumatic situation concerning a man, and therefore, will relate to most all men in the same way. Do you know of other pets run from his presence?

......wayne

 

[AngelZoo]

This is something which I personally feel is very important to try and over come.

There are many pets out there whom act just like your cat. Including one of mine.

Take it from the view of, if you have to leave for an extended period of time, or a unplanned abcense, and your fiance is left as the only one to care for the cats. Not much care can be given if one of your cats is petrified by him.
I am/was in the same boat as this situation.
I have 3 cats, and Tage, is really scared of most people SPECIALLY my fiance. The only one he is not scared of, is myself. I went away for a week out of state, and Tage spent the whole time hiding in the laundry room by himself.
We don't have quit a bad of a case as you seem to, Tage does have his moments where he will sit on my fiance's lap.

Put your fiance in a room where you can close the door, and there is no beds to hide under (perhaps a bathroom).
Then grab some yummie cat treats, and take Gidgit into the bathroom with you where your fiance will be.
Just let Gidgit go, and do her own thing, if she hides in a corner that's fine. Keep practicing this for about 5-10- minutes about 3 times a day (or as often as you can) You can also have you fiance place out a treat a few feet away from her to intice her to come out.
Hopefully she will progess to taking the treat from his hand, or eat the treat while standing right next to him.
Have him work his way up to convincing her to putting her front paws on his lap to reach the threat from his hand, so on and so forth.

Tage and my fiance have lived together for years now, but I finally took it upon myself to do a bit of forced bonding time with both of them. I was able to do it in the kitchen as Tage will come to me, and not be too startled as long as my fiance does NOT move, and sits on the floor.
By that same night, we had Tage sitting in his lap eating little peices of wet food from my fiance's hand, just as happy as could be.
He's still skiddish sometimes, if my fiance walks into a room and Tage is in one of his... moods, he will get this frightened look on his face and bolt, but it's nothing anywhere near as bad as it used to be, and Tage is quiet affectionate with my fiance mostly now.
After a while, try and switch your fiance to becoming the primary care taker (as in have him be the one to get the cat food ready and hand out the meals each day) so Gidgit will associate good things with him.


There's lots of things you can do to help the bonding process, but very little can change when you have a cat who feels no need to bond with others, and when you don't try to rectify this problem.
Give it time, and I wish you luck!

 

[kristi]

Gidge sounds just like my Lemur! She is quite the spook. She has never been abused. Some cats are just this way, naturally afraid. Her instincts are excellent; she caught a mouse at 6 weeks old; I think it's all related.

I don't mind that Lemur loves me and doesn't love anyone else. She will approach my husband if I'm not here, or if he has food, but that's it. If you want to work on it, though, AngelZoo's recommendations sound excellent.

I don't think a few chips will hurt Gidge. Lemur loves macaroni, and I let her have a piece occasionally. Our cats are terribly spoiled!