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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
Hi guys! I know I've posted about this before and it got closed, but I REALLY need some help here. My brother is SEVERELY allergic to cats. He gets stuffy, watery eyes, runny nose, cant breathe, and sneezy kinda symptoms. My nephew just turned 6 months old and we havent seen him in 4. This is killing my mom since we cannot see him. He pretty much wont even let us see him or his kid. He said that weekly baths for the cat along with brushing cats daily, buying brand new clothes that have not had access to cats and us showering before seeing him wouldn't work. He said he takes benadryl but it makes him sleepy but I do not know if it works for him. Anytime my mom says anything to him he only says to get rid of the cats which would break my heart. He wont even let us see him outside at the park. My mother said she doesn't need to hold him, she just wants to see them. What can we do besides getting rid of the cats? I really need help here :(

I should also add that he wont even let us ATTEMPT to buy new clothes, showering, baths for the cats or even brushiing them daily.
 

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That seems pretty extreme to me. Like maybe there is something else besides cat troubles. I'm so sorry, because what you have offered is what I would have offered to do: different clothes for the people, visiting outdoors at a neutral place. And I would have expected that to work quite well. I've had friends who could not (would not) visit me due to allergy, so we met elsewhere.
 

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Discussion Starter #3
He is also allergic to dust, so that probably doesnt help. He is refusing to compromise. He doesnt even want to try and let us shower, and new clothes and meet at a neutral place! even if he did take drugs he doesnt want to try.
 

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I am wondering even if you got rid of the cats if it would matter. It would take a long time for all the "catness" to get out of your furniture, etc. So basically your brother is never going to let his son know his aunt and grandmother? That seems extremely selfish to me.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
I dont think getting rid of the cats would matter, at least not for MONTHS. He had an allergic reaction to a blanket that his wife bought from a secondhand store, even after it had been washed! I think for getting rid of the cats to work, we'd need all new carpets, furniture and even a whole new wardrobe just to see him.
 

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it sounds like he doesn't want to be a part of your lives and is using the cat as an excuse.

There are many allergy medications that don't make you sleepy and work just as well. If even being around items that have been near cats bothers him then he pretty much shouldn't be outdoors
 

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So I am a grandma and I guess that is why I take this to heart. I guess he is hoping for the long term outcome to be no cats but mean while not to meet you in a park with washed clothes, etc. and let grandma see her grandson?
 

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I also have a grandchild, and it sounds to me like there is more going on than just the cat. I'd be very disappointed, but I'd also wonder if I ditched the cat would it really be any different.
 

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Discussion Starter #10
He doesnt want to take any chances. When he has a reaction it usually lasts for 5+ days. when his wife had bought and washed the blanket he had a reaction for 9 days! We all skype with him tonight so I'm hoping we can do something together soon.
 
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