Cat Forum banner
1 - 12 of 12 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hey there folks! New member here.

I'm writing because maybe you may have suggestions over out cat situation...

In a very short version story, my gf moved in with her cat while I had another cat (both females). I was here in this house for a month so it was kinda new for all of us.

We had then in separated areas of the house. We called a cat behavioralist and he told us to get a net door and slowly introduce each other with treats, swap them every day without letting them to see each other,etc.

So, fast forward 2 years and 1 more behavioralist, and we are kind of in the same situation: both cats stare aggressively at each other over the training door after they got treats when the wooden door is open, and if we leave it open for long enough they will start hissing at each other.

The 2 or 3 times they managed to have physical access to each other over these 2 years they started fighting (and oh man it was horrible).

There seem to be some progress tho; unlike at the start, the first moment they see each other they sniff each other's noses and proceed to eat the treats. But it just needs a few minutes after that to let the aggression start (in the form of staring, then hissing).

What is your take in this scenario?
An option would be to open the door and let them define their relationship: for sure they'll fight, but hopefully they might stop before they slash each other's eyes?

What's your opinion?


Thanks a million!
 

·
Registered
Franny -- best cat ever! purring in my heart Porch cat THE DIVIT aka Divey seriously traumatized
Joined
·
50 Posts
I vote no on the option.
Give it another year - or more - and even another after that!
Definitely not a quick fix. Gandhi would say be the change you want to see in the world -- even if it is only the one you share with your cats. Gandhi might even call that season an Experiment in Truth. The preposition IN is not randomly chosen.
With a reference to your Star Trek uniform -- fortunately you are boldly going where others have gone before you -- all grew peace from the inside out. I can't think of a better way to celebrate the gift of another day -- bringing peace into the life of the next moment.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
35 Posts
I have to agree with ahh I aint no pet! as well. It just takes time. It is frustrating for sure given that length of time for those two, but they are aware of each other and have common ground with treats. Not sure how everyone feels about Jackson Galaxy, for me, he's quite the feline behaviorist and I recommend videos on YT with him. I find his methods are quite good. Even though you are past the "introduction" stage with your two kitties, maybe there's something in his videos that may help with your situation. I'm not allowed to link videos here in this forum but search his name and this title. "How to introduce cats"

Oh,,,and welcome to the forum!!
 

·
Registered
Franny -- best cat ever! purring in my heart Porch cat THE DIVIT aka Divey seriously traumatized
Joined
·
50 Posts
Hey Rick! I thought of Jackson too -- do you think his approach would be a "reboot" for restarting the scent familiarize room by room method? I thought of that as two cat and a blank slate. Would Emiliano start at square one on -- Jackson Galaxy How to introduce two cats -- Emiliano, just cut and paste that into a search and it will take you to his videos and more.
 

·
Super Moderator
Joined
·
27,073 Posts
If you're still willing to work on this, I'm not trying to discourage you, just giving another point of view from my own experience. You can keep trying and trying and trying, and still not have a good result. If you had to, do you know which cat you would rehome? Some cats are meant to be "only" cats. I went through this for 1-1/2 years with one new cat and am still mad at myself for making all of us miserable for such a long time. She went to great home as the only cat where she is spoiled rotten. Do you have a friend or relative who would take one of them? That would be great, you could still have them in your life, just not in your house.
 

·
Registered
Franny -- best cat ever! purring in my heart Porch cat THE DIVIT aka Divey seriously traumatized
Joined
·
50 Posts
While remembering that one is HER cat and the other HIS cat -- I return to a blending of Gandhi and Jackson Galaxy's approach to differences. It may not be the fastest route however, it is less likely to leave scars of some sort.
 

·
Super Moderator
Joined
·
27,073 Posts
I was responding to the OP's request for opinions and options, while not criticizing the advice of other members.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
35 Posts
Hey Rick! I thought of Jackson too -- do you think his approach would be a "reboot" for restarting the scent familiarize room by room method? I thought of that as two cat and a blank slate. Would Emiliano start at square one on -- Jackson Galaxy How to introduce two cats -- Emiliano, just cut and paste that into a search and it will take you to his videos and more.
Not sure if it would be a total reboot per se, but it would be a different approach and could be a possibility for some progress.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
12 Posts
This is a tough situation Indeed. My experience with introducing two new female additions (Bella and Cori) to my two brother cats (Wylie and Willie) was a fun one. Wylie and Willie were 7 when a new stray little girl Bella was coming onto my porch and I was feeding her. The boys would growl and hiss through the window, especially Wylie. I decided to get her fixed and adopt her. After she was locked up healing from the vet visit, She happily came out to greet the boys. Holy moly, Wylie completely lost it! He was so bent out of shape growling, hissing, and swatting at all of us. It literally took him about 2 months to start calming down and accept the fact she was here to stay. Bella stood her ground and would chase the boys all over the house. It actually stressed me out a bit because the boys were used to being the only two in our stress-free home and now everyone was stressing over the situation in the house. A year later my little girl Cori came to my porch (this is what I get for feeding the ferals). After getting her fixed, and healed, I introduced her to the family by locking the cats in one room and letting one cat out at a time to get acquainted. Of course, both Wylie and Bella picked on Cori until they got used to her. Wylie wasn't as drama with Cori as he was with Bella. Fast forward a few years...Wylie still swats the girls and his brother daily if they get too close to show he is the king of the household (or so he thinks), but they really have learned to coexist for the most part. However, a few months back one of the girls swatted Wylie and caught her nail in the lining of his eyelid and it got inflamed. Luckily it wasn't a scratch to the eyeball and some topical vet meds healed him. I just have to make sure I cut their claws every couple of weeks and, of course, break up fights when possible. The girls swat at each other sometimes and playfully or more aggressively wrestle. My boys wrestle but they are far more aggressive with each other howling and biting. I just them duke it out for the most part but break it up if it starts to get out of hand. I do believe that Wylie and Bella have a love/hate relationship and have a playing hard-to-get fondness for each other (Like catnip through the hourglass, These are the Cat Days of Our Lives). So, from my experience, I have found to let them tough it out for the most part. I can say it worked for me but you said your girls basically get into horrific battles, so I can't predict if my kind of situation could work for you. Please keep us posted on what you decide.
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
16 Posts
Hi, I found a procedure that helped each of the cats tolerate each other. Wipe down each cat. Then swap the wipes and wipe the scent on the other. Keep doing this for a while eventually they will smell themselves on the other cat and tolerate them better. Good Luck.[/QUOTE]
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
736 Posts
It's never too late to reintroduce cats so I would certainly check out Jackson Galaxy and follow his advice step by step, and only move to the next step when the last one is accomplished. However, there are some cats no matter what you do will never get along, and it can cause serious health and behavioral problems, and in that situation it's often recommended for everybody's sake to rehome one of the cats. If that's not an option, whatever you do, do NOT just let them fight it out. Cats do have the capacity to seriously injure or kill another cat they consider to be a threat in their home.

If the slow approach to cat introduction doesn't work and you've tried things like calming scents for cats, and you're both determined to keep your cats, another option is to have a 2- cat household where they're never in the same part of the house at the same time. It requires constant monitoring to make sure they never meet, and can create a lot of stress in your household and your relationship. I know this because I tried it once and it was awful. Spent 2 years on it with scent-exchange, swapping rooms, multiple litterboxes, treats and meals near each other etc and deluded myself into thinking we were making progress because they eventually handled all that without a problem, but we never made it to a face-to-face meeting without a major cat-fight. Will never do that again.

I know this is a tough situation, and hope you find a way to co-exist peacefully!
 
1 - 12 of 12 Posts
Top