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Recently I've been noticing behavior changes in Juliette. She is almost one year old now. She's always been a very affectionate kitten, loved to be petted, never used to mind when I picked her up, rub her belly, etc. She generally was the type of cats that just purrs on contact. We used to live with my boyfriend. About a month ago, I moved with Juliette back to my parents' place and she has changed a lot since that time. This household is absolutely fine, everyone loves Juliette, we don't have any loud people or anything that could stress her out. Besides, when we lived separately, quite often we would bring Juliette with us to my parents' place for dinner and she seemed to love being here (she also was OK with our rides here and back). However, after we've moved, she doesn't let me pet her any more. She is still playful and active and she loves when I take her toys and play with her, but whenever I try to approach her to pet her, she runs away. She's not scared, it almost looks like she's just doing it to annoy me. She also stopped coming to my bed in the mornings (she used to be all over us around 6AM every single morning, purring and licking) :(

I am also having problems with feeding her. She's always been a picky eater. I used to feed her canned food only. For a while she was eating Chicken Soup for the Cat Lover's Soul and nothing else. When I tried to introduce new types of canned food, it didn't go well, she refused to eat anything. After some time, she started eating less of her regular food and I was beginning to worry that she would lose weight, so I decided to supplement her canned food with dry, which she has always loved. Now we're at the point when she won't eat much of the canned food at all and can go the whole day without eating anything, until I give up and give her dry (she still loves it). Maybe it was a mistake to start giving her dry food, but I was worried she wasn't getting enough calories. She seems to be healthy and active, so I don't think that she's sick. It seems to be more of a behavioral issue.

What am I doing wrong? Is distancing that I'm seeing in her just the normal part of growing up? Is she acting this way because there are more people around her now who give her attention? How do I fix this? Thanks for your advice!!
 

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You may not be able to "fix" this and will need to just be patient with the cat. Sasha was a very lovable kitten; a big momma's boy. I got him really young and was his surrogate mommy. Then around the 10 month mark, he started to become more independent, and now he's pretty skittish, but it seems to be he's just a big scaredy cat. It's nothing against me personally. If you walk too fast towards him, he slinks away from you as if you're going to hurt him and he makes himself scarce whenever anyone comes over. He's been spoiled since day one so it's not that he's been through any trauma or the like. He comes to us when he wants loving.

In your case, you cat may be missing your ex, and the changes in lifestyle may be a bit stressful to her...just be patient, and she'll settle down. She may not be as affectionate the way you want her to be. She is a big girl now, but they go through phases. Just enjoy the times when she does want to be held and cuddled :)
 

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I think at least is that she is simply growing up; in human years, she's a young teenager. Ritz is almost three years old, and every once in a while, she avoids me. I just tell myself she is pmsing, and I am getting better at not taking it personally. (One reason I switched Ritz from canned to raw is because, like Juliette, Ritz would only eat Fancy Feast, Classic, Seafood. Nothing else. Now on raw, she'll eat any kind of protein. Except fish.)
 

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Discussion Starter #4
To my surprise, this morning she came to my bed twice, sitting on my chest and licking me :) Can't believe I've actually missed being woken up at 6AM on Sundays! :)

RE feeding, she's terrible. I've been trying to limit the amount of dry she eats, but then she just refuses to eat anything for the whole day. She's actually lost weight in the past month or so. Every time I give in and fill her bowl with dry :( She does like raw meat. I sometimes give her a piece of chicken or pork while I'm cooking and she seems to like it. I am worried about bacteria and parasites though. I don't know much about feeding raw food, but I've read one article that showed salmonella and something else (can't remember now) in feces of cats who eat raw, so I don't know...
 

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Discussion Starter #6
I didn't say I understood it :) In fact, I said I didn't know much about it. Something to look into.
 

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However, after we've moved, she doesn't let me pet her any more. She is still playful and active and she loves when I take her toys and play with her, but whenever I try to approach her to pet her, she runs away. She's not scared, it almost looks like she's just doing it to annoy me. She also stopped coming to my bed in the mornings (she used to be all over us around 6AM every single morning, purring and licking) :(
Maybe she wants to play? Sometimes my cat runs away when we approach her. Sometimes she comes to us and runs away when we make a move towards her. It's usually because she wants us to play with her (chase her, or get a toy out that she can chase).
 

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One trick I use to endear shy cats to me is to offer Friskies Party Treats ala kitty crack. They warm up quickly to you when frequently offered to them.

I have cats which kept their distance from me, let me pet them while eating, slowly walk up to them making the treat bag give the crinkle sound, like Im getting treats out for them. I give 6-8 treats a pop. I havent met a cat yet who turned their nose up at the treats. Im sure they arent healthy treats but I have success with promoting a trusting behavior from them.
 
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