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As you all know - I'm working through the transition phase with Tuffy and new cat Satin.

Satin is still very skittish around me - I spent alot of time in her room with her yesterday just talking or even just sitting there reading a book. She did take a nap with me in the room, which I feel shows she is abit more relaxed and trustful of me, but she hates if I pet her.

First night of course she did not let me get anywhere near her, yesterday halfway through the day she did allow me to touch her, but she sort of cringes away and trembles when I touch her (I talk to her gently when I touch her so she knows I'm not threatoning her) - my question is, do I keep trying to pet her, or back away and let her come to me when she's ready?

My second question is - how do I know exactly when she and Tuffy are ready for the next step in meeting. I've done the scent swapping thing, Tuffy at first hissed at her scent but yesterday and this morning he has been camping outside her door - there is a two inch or more gap under the door in which they bat at each other. Satin on one side - Tuffy on the other - there has been no hissing at each other yesterday or this morning - they just do that trilling talking thing while they bat at each other - or bat toys back and forth.

Do I let that continue another day or so before I attempt face to face meeting? Under the door they can basically see each other anyway - of course the door is between them but their noses stick under - it's actually quiet comical to watch them - you can see noses and paws coming under the door - I've spent some time with both cats on either side to watch body language..

One more question - Satin has been with me since Saturday night and has not had a BM yet - should I be worried? SHe's eating and drinking fine..
 

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As you all know - I'm working through the transition phase with Tuffy and new cat Satin.

Satin is still very skittish around me - I spent alot of time in her room with her yesterday just talking or even just sitting there reading a book. She did take a nap with me in the room, which I feel shows she is abit more relaxed and trustful of me, but she hates if I pet her.

First night of course she did not let me get anywhere near her, yesterday halfway through the day she did allow me to touch her, but she sort of cringes away and trembles when I touch her (I talk to her gently when I touch her so she knows I'm not threatoning her) - my question is, do I keep trying to pet her, or back away and let her come to me when she's ready?

My second question is - how do I know exactly when she and Tuffy are ready for the next step in meeting. I've done the scent swapping thing, Tuffy at first hissed at her scent but yesterday and this morning he has been camping outside her door - there is a two inch or more gap under the door in which they bat at each other. Satin on one side - Tuffy on the other - there has been no hissing at each other yesterday or this morning - they just do that trilling talking thing while they bat at each other - or bat toys back and forth.

Do I let that continue another day or so before I attempt face to face meeting? Under the door they can basically see each other anyway - of course the door is between them but their noses stick under - it's actually quiet comical to watch them - you can see noses and paws coming under the door - I've spent some time with both cats on either side to watch body language..

One more question - Satin has been with me since Saturday night and has not had a BM yet - should I be worried? SHe's eating and drinking fine..
Keep doing what you're doing by spending time in the room, just sitting there, reading a book, talking to her but don't try to touch her. Let her come to you.

Before introduction, I'd get her comfortable with you. Once she knows she can trust you, then I'd introduce.

It's been a day...she may be too nervous but don't get too worried yet about lack of BM. If she hasn't gone by the end of today, I'd start to wonder what is going on. I'm assuming, of course, that she pees and knows where the litter is, correct?
 

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Yes - she peed in the litter box this morning so I know she's using it - just haven't found a BM yet.
 

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Keep doing what you're doing by spending time in the room, just sitting there, reading a book, talking to her but don't try to touch her. Let her come to you.
I agree. I did this with Franny, who was 2 1/2 when she came home. It took weeks, months. Progress was slow but steady. Now she's a borderline Velcro cat :) It's really important that she trusts you and that can only happen on her terms. I can't really help with the intro, as Franny and Franklin were pals from the first day.
 

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I agree with Serenity when she says you should wait and let Satin come to you. In the meantime, you can help the bonding process by playing with Satin, especially games that allow her to keep a comfortable distance until she's ready to move closer, such as fishing pole games, wand games, or just a long piece of string that you can wiggle on the floor and she can chase.

I would also wait until she seems more comfortable with you and her new surroundings before you do a face-to-face with Mr. Tuffy. In the meantime, keep exchanging toys, giving something of Tuffy to Satin and vice versa. Once Satin starts to look more relaxed in her new home, I would try doing a room exchange for a day or so (put Tuffy in Satin's room and let Satin explore the rest of your home), and then a face-to-face thereafter.

As for the bowel movement, I never had that problem. However, I recall at least 3 threads on the Forum in the past 3 months that involved members who just adopted a new cat who didn't have a bowel movement for the first few days. In each case, the new cat had a bowel movement by the 3rd day, and there was no problem. So, it sounds like a normal problem with cats in new surroundings. Just make sure she's drinking properly and you'll likely be fine.
 

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As far as the BM question goes, Leo didn't have a BM for well over 48 hours when I first got him. I think he was too scared. He finally went during the middle of the third day and has been going like clockwork ever since.

I would also try having some treats to give her as well. Wild-side Salmon (dried salmon) is good. Wellness also makes treats that my cats are crazy for. This will help cement the idea in her head that you are the food giver.
 
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