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I get so upset when I hear or read about a cat dying. I just wish cats could live a lot longer, like 50 years. I guess it's because my Razzle is dying with chronic renal failure. I feel it's not fair that he will die soon and not live to 23 years old like some cats. i just can't imagine my life without him. He's not the dream cat i've always wanted but i love him with all my heart. I wish he curled up in my arms at bedtime. I've always wanted him to kiss my face and put his paw on my face to show that he loves me, but that has never happened. He never greets me at the door with a meow saying he's so happy i'm home. He's never brushed away my tears. He never follows me around the house, but I know he loves me with the little things he does. He's not just a cat. He came into my life over 16 years ago and has forever wrapped his tail around my heart. I'm so afraid of losing him and don't know how I will cope without him. I know I need to enjoy everyday i have with him but I can't stop thinking I will lose him one day and how will I go on. I know this, and many people have told me, but many times i can't help stop worrying about losing the most precious cat I have ever had. His paw prints will forever be imprinted on my heart.

Kathy
 

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I know how you feel, I lost my Samantha 2 months ago to cancer.
In some way I guess I'm lucky she was 5 days past her 16 birthday, never sick, hurt or injured her entire live.
The night before everything was find, the next day the nightmare began when I found her in distress lying in the middle of the floor.
I rushed he to the vet where test revealed a belly full of cancer, surgery was the only option and at best it would provide maybe another year.
I couldn't put my baby through that so I made the choice to let her go, she died in my arms.
The suddenness was devastating, I take some solace that 1 terrible day doesn't cancel out 5849 good days.
I too wish our small friends had a longer life span, but 16 years is a good long life for a cat, it's like 80 to a person.
I never thought of my Samantha as old, she was still as beautiful as ever and while she didn't jump on top of the cabinets anymore she was still active.
If I Knew how long she was going to live the day I got her I'd do it all over, I regret some things, not playing with her as much as I could have but we had our time every night before bed and I'd always tell her how pretty she was and how lucky Papa felt to be owned by such a lovely creature.
I can't undo the past but I tried to provide her with a good life and I was there for her at the very end so she wasn't alone, she knew her Papa loved her very much and there's really nothing more we can do for them but love them and cherish the time we have together.
My dearest wish is to be reunited with the small animals who've shared my heart with.
I don't know if I deserve to go to heaven or if there really is a heaven, but if my little friends aren't there I don't want to go there.
 

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I'm definitely not trying to minimize what your cat is going through but can't cats live quite a few years with CRF? I thought we have members who have had their CRF cats live long lives with proper diet/care....
 

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My heart really does go out to you x

I've lost both of my boys this year within 3 months of each other, Percival was 18 and not the most openly loving or affectionate cat there ever was but I know he loved me in his own little special ways, he had on going problems, I was so very upset when he finally had to leave us in April but I was lucky to be comforted by my baby boy Samurai who was the most loving cat I've ever had the pleasure of owning or knowing. When he had to go at the age of 12 (a week ago today) it totally and utterly broke my heart - I still break down in tears at the drop of a hat and don't see the pain easing any time soon. All I have left are my memories and photos, I wish I had made videos - something, anything more to hold on to...

They come into our lives only for a short time but they give so very much ♥

All I can advise is for you to make the most of every day that you are blessed to still have Razzle with you, try your hardest to keep upbeat (these little fluffies are more sensitive and receptive than most give them credit for) he will pick up on your heartache and may get confused, depressed or worried... Please try to not cross the mourning bridge until it is actual time to....

If you ever want to chat or simply pour out emotions, please find some small comfort to know that I am usually available on here and will be there for you.
 

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I don't know if I deserve to go to heaven or if there really is a heaven, but if my little friends aren't there I don't want to go there.
I agree wholeheartedly with you.
The thought that I will one day be reunited with my beautiful boys (one way or another) makes it easier for me get through the day...
 

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Last time you posted about him, he was doing well. Has he taken a turn for the worse?

We're all going to lose our cats, and many of us already have. It's better not to waste time mourning them while they're still here and enjoy them.
 

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I agree wholeheartedly with you.
The thought that I will one day be reunited with my beautiful boys (one way or another) makes it easier for me get through the day...
There are a few of us on here who have noticed that our heart kitties have a personality/mannerisms similar to a past beloved soul pet. In my case my deceased dog, Mini. She was my heart pooch and MowMOw is so like her that it's uncanny.

I find a great deal of comfort in thinking that perhaps that little soul is meant to be with me throughout my life. First in Mini, now in MowMow and in future in some other form.
 

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I find a great deal of comfort in thinking that perhaps that little soul is meant to be with me throughout my life. First in Mini, now in MowMow and in future in some other form.
I hope you're right, the thought of having to continue my life without the love of my Samurai absolutely crushes me... He really was "the love of my life" ♥
 

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My heart goes out to you, and I know what you mean about wanting to see them in heaven. When in college, I attended a church and during a mission trip got into a argument with the pastor on whether or not animals go to heaven- him insisting the bible said they didn't. I demanded to see the verse, and was amazed at how he could of taken it as animals are temporary. (Now mind, I know not everyone is christian, but I found this interesting.)

"All have the same breath[c]; humans have no advantage over animals. 20 All go to the same place; all come from dust, and to dust all return. 21 Who knows if the human spirit rises upward and if the spirit of the animal goes down into the earth?”

It's in Ecclesiates, so I cut out the 'everything is meaningless' part. Depressing, depressing book. :p

However, in all spiritual belief systems I have found that animals, if not going to heaven with us, then act as spirits and guardians on earth. Whether the belief of reincarnation and us being one and the same, or Native American beliefs that places huge importance on animal spirituality. It's only more recent beliefs that have disenfranchised animals from being spiritually important.

So, I know you probably didn't want a small dissertation, but I always found logically looking around myself to help with sorting out my own emotions, and to give myself some basis to my own hopes. As my mom says, 'I fully expect Keela and Midnight to be waiting right at heaven's gates for us with Grandpa Bob.' :)
 

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Meme absolutely adored me, I don't know why I certainly didn't do anything to deserve it but she chose me to be her human.
When she died I was crushed, no other cat could take her place, but I'd grown used to having a small friend in my life and I acquired Samantha.
Samantha was as different from Meme as two cats could be, Meme was abandoned in the office park I worked at and rescued by the girls that worked there, Samantha was a Pedigree Maine **** who never knew hunger, sickness, abuse or lack of love her entire 16 year life.
She was a confident kitty, not needy in any way, when I first got I lamented that she wasn't loving like Meme, but I won her heart and we bonded, I also excepted her for the car she was not the cat I wanted her to be.
She didn't replace Meme in my heart she made her own place beside Meme in my heart.
I hope they're together on the other side waiting for me.
For my part I know I need to carry on the legacy of love that they taught me even though it will end in death and mourning, it's part of the circle of life that we all share.
On this form there are stories of births of new kitten, people who have acquired their first kitty, there are also stories of people with an older cat who's health is in decline and finally there are the stories of those of us who've lost a dear little friend.
It's a microcosm of society as a whole.
 
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