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The cat that has always mothered ME....the cat that always washed my face when it was dirty, waked me up on time ( even during power outages ) and kept me company for 14 years. She was a good cat...even strange since she had no fear of water and like to sleep curled up in my bathroom sink. Even for her age so was always quite active....kitten like even. She was strictly indoors and almost never fought it....which is good for a apartment cat. She was a good cat...never really sucky but always near you.

In the past few months she was getting constipated but after a little pumpkin she was always okay and got through on her own and was quite happy. The problems started a week ago when she could not get it out. She refused to eat and was drinking a lot more than usual. I took her to the vet and then gave her 2 enemas which was the result of a cherry sized turd only. The vet gave me medicine and sent her home with me......but it did not work. I waited a few more days and then in the middle of last sunday night I heard a howling meow. I woke up and found her laying on her side on the floor. She purred when I stroked her and I picked her up and took her to her food dish. When I let go she fell over again. I panicked and took her to the vet again.....to be denied completely because I had no money. I begged for mercy and they relented. They did the blood tests that I asked for and there was a LOT of red on the sheets. Menas liver and kidneys had shut down. I asked to keep her home for one more day with the hopes that it was a mistake. I di dnot want to do what I knew what needed to be done. This was my first cat that I had since I first moved out on my own.

The next day I found her laying on her side with a little blood coming out of her mouth. She appeared to be kicking a lot and could not stand up at all. Her eyes were...empty it appeared. I knew that I made a mistake and grabbed my iphone and called the vets. I got a caring vet that I knew and she asked me "WOuld you like us to help her" I knew what she meant....I knew what had to be done or Mena would choke on her own. I did not want her to die like that.

I took her to the vets and they let me stay with her as they gave her a shot....they gave her an overdose of Anesthesia that did the job in seconds. I cried and cried....

I am a 32 yr old man....single...and I broke down like a baby....which is what I am doing now as well as I type this. To those that say that men do not cry are full of themselves IMHO.

I miss my cat....all I want is to have her back.....in any form....just so I know that she is there with me. I feel like...nothing. I feel like an empty void. I know that cats have an afterlife....a spirit/soul.....but she died at the vet...not at my home. Because she never went outside I am not sure that she will find her way to me. I only live a couple blocks away from the vets but will she know the way? :crying:crying:crying:crying:crying

 

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My heart is breaking for you right now. I'm still waiting for my Smokey to visit me, though I did find one of his whiskers out of nowhere two weeks after he died in an area that had been cleaned quite a few times.

Mena was a beautiful little girl. I'm sure my Smokey was waiting at the Rainbow Bridge for her so he could give her a tour. I am so very sorry for your loss. *hugs*
 

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I am crying as I read you beautiful girl's story. I know your pain all too well, I am so sorry. You did a very loving thing for her by setting her free from the burden of a long and painful death. In her last moments you did the most compassionate and selfless thing possible for her. I have no doubt in my mind Mena knows that through it all she was truly loved. And I have no doubt that she is over that bridge, laying in the sunlight excitedly telling Smokey and my Snickers about the most amazing human daddy in the world, and that she was so lucky cause he was all hers, and that he loved her so much. I am sure she is sending her love to you from the other side~

Rest in peace sweet Mena, know missed you are~
 

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I'm sorry Digi.. I know you must be terribly upset.
Reading your story really made me so sad for you.
Just know that she's resting in peace with lots of other kitties to play with.

Maybe once you're feeling better, you can get a kitten (if you want a kitten) or get a cat?
 

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Discussion Starter #5
Thing is....I have never been without a cat. There has always been one by my side all of my life. All of a sudden I am finding myself asking....If I get another cat I will have to do this all over again....

:crying

However if I do get another cat it will be kitten.
 

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I'm so sorry for your loss. I know exactly how you fill. 2 months ago I lost my cat too. I'm man and was crying just like you. You will fill sadness and emptiness for some time now, but you have to be strong. Life must go on. You gave a good life to your kitty and that what counts the most.
I am so sorry...
 

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You get another kitty when *you* are ready. That comes at different times for different people. Some go right out and get another one. It took me a year before I was willing to look at another cat. Neither is wrong, we all deal with grief differently.

I know I waited because I wanted Snickers back. And I knew if I got a cat I would expect it to be just like Snickers, to act like her and look like her. Because I didn't want another cat, I wanted her. I knew that about myself, and I knew that that was an impossible expectation to place on any kitty. Cats are all unique individuals, there will never be another exactly like my beautiful princess. So I waited until I knew my heart was open to letting me love a cat for who it is and not for who I wish I could be. Kent is nothing like Snickers, both are so different yet both are the perfect cats for me. You will know when you are ready.
 

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I'm so sorry for your loss. You did the right thing, although I know how difficult it must have been. Mena was very sweet, especially in the video drinking water. She will always be in your heart. Rest in peace, little Mena.
 

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I'm so sorry. I do understand how painful it is to lose a kitty.

Mena was beautiful, and it sounds like she had a great life living with you. It's obvious how much you love her.
 

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I know words cannot comfort you now, and only time will heal. You gave her a long, wonderful life so few are blessed to have. And I'm sure she will find her way home to you. Cats are good about that! Take the time you need to grieve and when you're ready, a cat will find you. That's always how it works for me. Big hugs!
 

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all this is small price to we have to pay for the years of pleasure we got in return, each time we bring a new one into our lives I tell he/she "one day you will beak my heart, its not your fault its just part of the deal". as for her spirit its with you, as part of yours is with her. space, distance or direction has no bearing on this..(she most likely beat you home) you were honored to have such a freind..(when its time for the next one you'll know it)
 

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What a darling cat was Mena, such a sweet expression. Love the video of her dipping her paw into the water---gets a drink and washes paw at the same time. Very cute!

It's such a heart wrench to lose a beloved catfriend. I too have known it often. I'm sure Mena would love you to give another one a home and owner as loving as she had, and some day you will feel like doing that.

I truly believe that no love is ever lost and that you will, some day, be reunited with Mena. Cherish the good memories you have of her.

"No heaven will not ever Heaven be; unless my pets are there to welcome me." ~ Anonymous
 

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I'm glad you cried! Not glad you're sad... but that you were "man enough" to show it! It reveals that you truly care(d) about your cat.

My ex-husband lost 3 cats during our marriage... never cried. Was a bit down, yeah, but it was like "Oh well, I'll just go get another one". BAH!

Anyhoo... you have my condolences. And yes, it does seem empty without a cat. When you're ready, you should go adopt one from a rescue group, and know that even though Mena is gone, you can now give another cat a chance at a good life. Heck, with you, a GREAT life!
 

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Discussion Starter #15
Thanks guys. I cannot tell you how much it means to me that I am not alone.

Call me selfish though....I wish that she was here with me....even though she is supposed to be at this Rainbow Bridge. I would welcome her being here even as a ghost cat. LOL!

Bad enough that every shape or shadow that I see I think it is her. :crying
 

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I'm terribly sorry for the loss of your Mena. :patback She was a beautiful girl, and the video was very sweet. Run free at the Bridge lovely girl.
 

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I'm crying for you - I don't even want to imagine this day with my babies but I know eventually it will come -- HUGS you tight.
 

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Aww, that video of her drinking is so sweet. I'm so sorry for your loss. It's great that you had 14 happy years with her. RIP Mena :,(
 

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Discussion Starter #19
Thanks guys. :( Getting better now but at time I would almost swear that I hear her walking across the floors at times. I never trimmed her claws so you could always hear the click click click of her walking.
 

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I'm so sorry, and from the distance I'm sending you a big hug.
I've been through all that...sometimes I still feel like my kitty is going to come back and meow to me, sometimes I feel like crap again and I cry myself to sleep. But as many kitty owners have said here, time will heal it, you'll see, and when the time comes you'll be receiving a new kitty in your heart.

Try to get busy...do some work, some cleaning, go get together with friends, do some exercise, walk, or just talk to people who are supportive and understand what you're going through...do not make yourself feel miserable by looking at her pictures and blaming yourself for what happened.

Soon you'll be able to thing about her and look at her pics and stuff, and remember her with a smile.

A big hug, feel free to PM me if you want to talk :patback

Lenka
 
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