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I have a 7 year old stray female Birman/Ragdoll? who adopted from a lady 2 years ago; I recently adopted a 3 year old male stray Ragdoll/Himalayan. I've given him his own bedroom and slowly introduced them by way of scent, I traded blankets and allowed resident female to smell his room while he was in another room.

I moved her bowl close to his door, both of their bowls are merely separated by the door of the bedroom. The past couple of days I let them see each other by cracking the door open, my female hissed and growled but nothing major. They traded paw swipes (the male seems to do it in jest?). However, today I let my guard down and my female entered his room. I tried to play it clamly by dangling their favorite today between both of them to try and associate something positive between each other. Anyways, the male got rowdy and tried to pounce on the female. Nevertheless she got startled and growled. So far all the hostile emotions are coming from her.

I adopted him last Wednesday night and it's been a week and 1 day now. Does it normally take this long? Should I continue to leave him quarantined or how should I move onto the next phase of this?
 

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You might want to try baby gates for a couple weeks. That will let them get used to seeing each other, being around each other. I bought three gates from Walmart ($12 each) and stacked them on top of each other.

Pictures? :grin:
 

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You might want to try baby gates for a couple weeks. That will let them get used to seeing each other, being around each other. I bought three gates from Walmart ($12 each) and stacked them on top of each other.

Pictures? :grin:
I only have a picture of my female; here are a couple:

 

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OMGosh! She's gorgeous, definitely part Birman, if not all. With her white little feet, she may be a purebred, like Cinderella.

Someone posted here a while back about something dangerous in aquarium water for cats, can't remember what it is, though.
 

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She's absolutely beautiful! As for the introduction, a week would be a very short introduction time for two adult cats...so what you're seeing is perfectly normal. It will likely take a few weeks to a few months before they're comfortable with each other.
 

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Update: Today was not a good day. I let him out while she was in my room, he got a temper tantrum. I was trying to get them to play together and as soon as she turned her back, he pounced on her and she swatted him; a fight broke and she ran away as he trailed after her. Is this normal?
 

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It is normal. From your description, it sounds like it was a real fight, as opposed to play-fighting. If so, then it suggests that your two are not yet ready to be put together. You might try using the baby gates for a week or two, as Marie suggested.
 

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She still hisses at him. Is it still too early for her to accept him?

I moved to stage 2. I put up plastic gates to his room and their bowls are an arm lengths from each other.
 

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There is no set timeline by which this will proceed, since it will differ from cat to cat. The "norm" is often a few weeks, and you've already been at it for about that length of time. However, it could well take longer in your case, since your female is around 7 and is not used to having other cats around (at least not for the last few years). BTW, are they both spayed/neutered?

In addition to keeping them separated by the gate, try to have as many good things happen by the gate as possible. You're already feeding them there, which is good...other "good things" include play, treats, catnip, etc. That way, they will slowly learn to associate each other with good things. Also, if you aren't already, I would do a daily room exchange, by putting the female in the safe room for a hour or so and letting the male run around the house. In that way, they will each be depositing their scent in the other's area, creating a sort of communal or family scent, which is important to the cats' feeling like they both belong.
 

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He somehow managed to take down the top gate and got out, he pounced on her and tore some fur from her. She's really shaken by the incident and has become more attached to me. BTW, while she does hiss at him; she never instigates anything. Think of her as the insecure adult cat, very shy and nervous. He seems to take every opportunity to pounce on her for some reason and I'm not sure if it will stop.

I'm really distraught and I need some guidance over what to do. My family members are not happy more than anything.
 

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is the male cat fixed? he just may be trying to take charge of everything.. not with any social graces, I don't know if these help or not but the feliway products are on sale on amazon.(also on sale at petco, right after I paid to much for one at petsmart last week)
 

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Thanks, but is there no one else with the same experiences willing to share?

BTW, whenever I trade spaces [she in his room and he having the whole house] - he starts looking for and starts crying at her door. Why is he adamant about pouncing on her? I don't get it, is he mentally not stable or this some teenager/young adult phase.
 

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I have four cats, two males and two females. My first cat, Hades (male, 3) is a big gentle giant and I had him for a year before I got my second cat, Tig who is a female and 4 years old. It took them a week and a half of hissing, tackling, chewing on each others necks etc, for them to finally settle whatever dominance battle they had. Now, a little under a year later, they are best buds. They still tussle from time to time, but I think that's normal for every cat. They also have learned to adjust to change due to the fact that I foster cats and kittens.

My second two, Hermes (male, eight) and Lily (female, 10) came to me back in September. Because I live in a tiny mobile home and only have one area available for litterboxes, I didn't do -any- introducing. I basically just let the new cats out and played referee. Hades and Hermes handled it fine. They roughhoused etc for about two days and calmed down. Tig and Hermes are like mortal enemies and they fought constantly for about 3 weeks. Same with Hades and Lily. Three weeks of growling, batting, hissing, tackling, etc. But it's calmed down now. I do punish whatever cat starts the fight now (mainly Hermes towards Tig) by grabbing the cat and flipping them on their back. I know this is mainly a tactic used with dogs to establish dominance, it works really well with my cats and now we pretty much have a set dominance order of Me-Hades-Lily-Hermes-Tig.

It will take -time- and yeah you will see some pretty drastic nasty fights. Your boy cat may be having some crazy teenage thing going on (Hades was a NIGHTMARE from about 6 months to a year) but just stay positive. It will subside. They will get over their bad selves. Also age is a big factor. Lily is ten. Hades is three. Hades just wants to play and wrestle and tumble about. Lily wants to sleep. Your male cat pouncing on her is "HEY. HEY YOU. HEY PLAY WITH ME. PAY ATTENTION TO ME PLZ". Like a puppy.

Have patience. It'll work out in the end.
 

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There are times when I too wondered about mental stability! His pouncing could be due to a few things -- and, not being able to see him, it's hard for me to determine which. You describe the female very shy and nervous. Thus, he might just be trying to play, but she's scared/not ready/misinterpreting, which is the source of your troubles. It might also be that he's not too fond of her yet, and the pouncing is aggressive. I would add that her nervousness doesn't help matters, since nervous cats are often the target for aggression by other cats.

Based on your descriptions (for example, you say "he tore fur from her"), I'm assuming these fights/pouncing are quite aggressive and constitute actual fighting, but do his actions appear to you like he's truly trying to fight with her...or do they seem more like playing? You should also confirm that both have been spayed/neutered, because if they haven't (or one hasn't), that is likely a further source of trouble. For now, I'll assume both have been "fixed" and that their fights are actual fights and not play-fights.

On those assumptions, the only thing you can do is to keep them separated via baby gates (making sure neither can get in or out) and have as many good things as you can happen near the gates. I know it's frustrating and it will likely take time, especially given the age of your two cats.

When I introduced my girls, they needed to be separated for almost three months before they could be left in the same room together (even though I was there to supervise). It was almost five months before they could be left alone together unsupervised -- and, at the relevant time, they were much younger than yours. But, like your female, Muffs (my resident cat) was very nervous and skittish, and it took a long time for her to stop being fearful of Abby. I even went so far as to hire a behaviorist to assist with the introduction. The only thing that helped (and what the behaviorist recommended) was having the two cats continually exposed to each other in a non-threatening way (i.e., behind the gates), feeding them either side of the gate, playing with them, grooming them, etc. Eventually, it worked and they're now best friends, but it's a slow and often frustrating process.
 
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