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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I originally came to this forum seeking advise on my two cats, one of whom was acting out after having been made an exclusively inside kitty. Both of my cats had been bitten by a poisonous snake within weeks of each other which was was they were no longer allowed outside. Shortly after posting my first thread my Arlo kitty escaped out of the house again and was bitten again. The two bites in a short time frame proved to be too much for him despite treatment and he passed away on the 10th.
Leo, his brother, wasn't there when Arlo passed away but he seems to know and is very distressed. He's very clingy(which is nice because I'm mourning Arlo's loss as well and loving on him helps) and often wanders the house meowing loudly. It's like he's looking for his brother. :( He is also constantly grooming himself and has licked bald spots on both shoulders. He's not eating as much even when I tempt him with tasty treats. I'm worried about him, is there anything I can do about him grooming so much? Is it just a stress reaction? The vet said he's perfectly healthy and didn't really have any advise.

On a side note, he's also been more destructive and is shredding everything he touches. I bought some soft claws which I put on him just a few hours ago. He doesn't like them and keeps trying to chew them off. How long does it usually take for them to get used to them if you used them with your cat?
 

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I am sorry to hear of your loss. Poor you and poor little Leo.

If he's greiving the best thing you can do is what you're already doing, reassure him and give him plenty of cuddles. As for the over grooming- you could try a 'lampshade' to stop him reaching the areas, however, if Leo is anything like my girls, this may just stress him out further. I dressed Evie in a premature babygro following her spaying to stop her getting to the irritable area, which she was fine with wearing. You could try this out?

Otherwise, try distracting him when he grooms.

I hope you and Leo feel better soon.
 

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I am so sorry for your loss...I know what you're going through.

Just lots of attention and distraction. I know this is very difficult for you since you're also grieving. But, even I know this might not serve as any consolation for you know, it is true that only time will heal your pain, yours and your kitty's.

In the meantime, as I said, give him lots of attention, get new stuff (maybe a new cat tree, o just come up with empty cardboard boxes or stuff he loves) to distract him. Also, you can try with feliway to calm him down.

I used to get so sad when my cat started crying really loud at night, searching for his lost friend, that I immediately ran towards him to see what was going on and usually picked him up to comfort him. That made him realize every time he cried, I would run to his aid. So now he cries for attention even when he's not unhappy (just needy). Try to distract him when he does that, so you don't condition his behavior (I cry= mom comes).

Finally, have you considered getting another kitty? This might not be the solution in some cases, and could be that bringing another cat could cause your older kitty even more stress. But on the other hand, if he was used to be with his litter mate, then a new companion could help him a lot to be happy again. And you could use the happiness a kitten will definitely bring to your life :)

Good luck!
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Thank you both. I would love to get another kitty but it's not really an option right now. With both cats and a dog we were already over our pet limit. We live off base so the military can't dictate how many pets we have but they will only pay to fly two pets home. My husband doesn't want to get another cat until we fly home so we won't have to pay for one of them. We are due to leave in about 6 months and I've looked up some shelters in the area. I was thinking of getting an older cat. I love kittens, they are adorable balls of love but I like cats more when they are older and a little more mellow.

Leo seems to be doing better, he's eating more and grooming a little less. He's still looking for his brother though and yelling at me a lot more then usual. I knew he was feeling lonely when I saw him walk past the dog without launching an attack, LOL.
 
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