[twise]

Hi, My names Tabitha, I'm 22 a full time college student and I work full time.

About 7 months ago I adopted a FIV+ cat and named him Rigby. I had a really hard time adjusting to having a cat. He wasn't my first pet, but coming from guinea pigs for years and years is a bit of a culture shock. I didn't know how LOUD cats can be and how kittenish a 1ish year old boy-cat still is. Eventually things evened out and we both made some compromises and I can't begin to describe how much I love him. I love having Rigby-cat around so much that I thought a second cat would be a good idea. I thought it would be nice to have a cuddly cat (Rigby doesn't cuddle- I don't try to make him- compromise!). I thought it would be nice for Rigby to have a partner in crime. I did some more research to make sure that it's possible to have a FIV+ cat with a negative one and everything said it'd be fine if they get along.

I found this gorgeous calico girl cat at petSmart and felt like she just clicked. I adopted her about two weeks later.

She is not fitting in. I'm trying really hard to be open minded and understanding, but she just doesn't mesh. She kneads a lot, she's insanely possessive, she'll play-but her world doesn't revolve around it. She had an ear infection, so she's on a 3 week course of Baytril (she's about a week and half in and doing way better) and she had tape worm.Honestly, I'm getting a little resentful that she's taking so much work and that makes me feel like a horrible person which makes me resentful that she makes me....(endless cycle here).

If it was just health issues and me adjusting to a new cat, I'd suck it up and wait longer for her to click. The problem is how the two cats relate. I've done the two weeks of separation. Went stressful (tiny apartment). I've done the door crack and let them see/sniff. Went well. I've moved on to the supervised together time. Not OK. Rigby wants to be friends. He doesn't know how to be friends. He pounces on her... a lot. He's obnoxious about it. I think the right cat would pounce and play back. Girl cat does NOT appreciate it. He'll tackle her and she'll hiss and start fighting and Rigby thinks that's just how they play and fights back. After fur started flying we are back to separated with no visitation.

So I don't know what to do here. I'm most concerned because she was in a foster home but came to me in such bad condition. Tape worm, a pound or two under weight, horrible coat condition, really long, gross nails, and an untreated ear infection. I take pride in providing the best basic care for my animals. I've taken responsibility for her. She's not going to be happy here - not as long as Rigby is part of the household.

So, do I return her to the rescue that lets her back in to bad condition? Do I let them fight it out? Do I spray bottle Rigby when he's being a jerk? Do I offer to foster her until the rescue can find her a home?

No matter what she's staying with me till she finishes her Baytril. I just, I don't know, I'm heart broken and torn up over this.

Here's a reward for reading. Pictures!

Rigby

(he doesn't like trig)

Still unnamed Girl-Cat

(still at PetSmart- she looks better now, but my phone with more recent pictures is in the other room and I'm lazy )

I hope you guys can give a first-time cat owner some support.

 

[Victoriax]

Hi, really sorry to hear of your trouble's, both cat's are beautiful xx

try to persevere with it, girl cat may be feeling a lil groggy with having worm's & an ear infection which is why she doesn't want to play

you could maybe ask if you can just be a fosterer for now & then if thing's work out then you could get to keep her!!!!

this must be very frustrating & upsetting for you but it is important that you try to stay calm & happy as the kitty's will pick up your feeling's,

when you let girl cat out into the apartement with Rigby you could try playing with them both with a teaser wand Da Bird is fantastic & a kitty fave, give them treat's & make it a pleasurable experience so that they assosciate being together with fun time's, this will also take way the attention from each other & onto you & the toy

do this everyday for how ever long you can keep their attention & then seperate them again, continue this for one week, then do the same but don't seperate them afterward's, feed them something yummy after your play session & then sit down & relax reading a book or something, honestly the more relaxed & calm you are about it the more your gorgeous kitty's will be

this may not work but it is worth a try, it would be such a shame if girl cat had to gpo through the stress of moving again

good luck to you all xxx

 

[Wannabe Catlady]

22 year old college student here too I understand how stressful a new sick kitten can be. I adopted my kitten Fink who ended up going to the vet so many times I honestly lost track. Tapeworms, parasites, bronchitis... ect... It can get exhausting! Kinda sucks I had to live off of beans and rice for a few weeks, but in the end, definitely worth it! lol

Personally, I would give it more time. I had to introduce my 4 month old kitten to my parents 6 year old cat, and that was quite the ordeal. We had them separated through a cracked door for about 4 weeks, and fed them on either side of the door. I think that helped them associate eachother with positive things

We also only did supervised play time, and it did involve lots of hissing initially. However, after several weeks, they did get along really well (even slept on the same bed together!!)

I also had to introduce him to a rowdy puppy, and that took another couple of weeks. They both had to learn their boundaries, and as long as the timid one (the cat in this case) had a safe place to go to, they got along fine.

I think you are doing a great job of keeping them separated, but yet visible to each other. Some cats just take a while to get used to each other. When you let them be in the same room, just try to distract them both with toys or treats.

However, in the end, if you feel that this is a task you just aren't up to, fostering the cat while they look for a new home is fine. It's really just about what is best for the cat.

 

[Penguin_Dreams]

Guess I'm going to be the voice of dissent here. Given your current schedule with school and work, and the massive amount of time and energy both of these cats takes, I would say one of them needs to find a home somewhere else and that's probably going to be the unnamed girl.

Unless you signed some kind of right of first refusal with the rescue, I think your best course of action is to finish her Baytril and find her another home, or find a home that you feel comfortable with them understanding what she needs and being able to commit to doing that. She is beautiful and young, and it shouldn't be too hard to get people interested in her. You can be as picky as you want to be in making sure she goes to a stable and loving home.

Honestly, it just sounds like an awful lot of work, and stress, and untenable situations, for you at a time when you can least afford it. It's totally okay to find another home that will work much better for everyone here.

 

[Mitts & Tess]

First off I want to say how wonderful you are for adopting a FIV cat. There are so many FIV and FeLv cats waiting a long time for forever homes and are over looked.

Just curious, how long did you give for the introduction process?

Here is a good article by Jackson Gallaxy.
http://www.littlebigcat.com/behavior/cat-to-cat-introductions/

Cats’ sense when another cat is sick. Not a good time to blend it into the mix until she is feeling better. Then begin. I would start over on the intros. You may have rushed intro too fast.

Rigby sounds like a typical youngster which hasn’t had the training of what the boundaries are in play. Adult cats provide that. They show them the rules in the cat kingdom. Plus they discipline them when they are going too far.

That being said, if you’ve decided not to keep the calico and not to give her more time to become one of the family then my feelings are not to return this cat to the rescue if they had her up for adoption and the cat was sick and had worms.

Every cat we rescue, we deworm whether we see evidence of it or not. We have adopted out, with their meds, cats which were still recovering. But we sent them home with the meds and the option of taking them back to the vet on our dime! Our rescue pays for the visits needed till they are back to health.

We don’t take sick cats to adoption events. But if someone came to our homes, where we foster our cats and like a certain cat which needs medicating then that is how we handle it. So a cat at Petsmart up for adoption with worms and medical issues is suspect to me of the quality of care cats are getting at this rescue. I wouldn’t give them this cat back. Just my humble opinion.

She is a beauty. Her markings are unique! I hope you give her another chance once she is better.

 

[twise]

Wow, thanks for all the support and replies!

this must be very frustrating & upsetting for you but it is important that you try to stay calm & happy as the kitty's will pick up your feeling's,

when you let girl cat out into the apartment with Rigby you could try playing with them both with a teaser wand Da Bird is fantastic & a kitty fave, give them treat's & make it a pleasurable experience so that they associate being together with fun time's, this will also take way the attention from each other & onto you & the toy

do this everyday for how ever long you can keep their attention & then separate them again, continue this for one week, then do the same but don't separate them afterwards, feed them something yummy after your play session & then sit down & relax reading a book or something, honestly the more relaxed & calm you are about it the more your gorgeous kitty's will be

good luck to you all xxx

I know how emotions can bleed through a household, so I'm trying to keep a tight rein on mine. I tend to be a rather high strung person- that's why I initially got Rigby, to be a sort of emotional support animal. I thought two cats would be twice the support. Um, not so much. :wink:

I have tried playing with them together (with DaBird actually!) it doesn't go so well. They both watch the toy intently until someone pounces, whereupon the other one flinches wildly and leaves. :?

Feeding them near eachother doesn't do much either. Girl-Cat is super into food but Rigby has barely any food drive at all. I've actually had trouble keeping food on him until I found a food nice and calorie dense. So she'll be chowing down, Rigby will take a couple of bites and then start bugging her.

I know they both look like kittens but Rigby is 1.5ish and Girl-cat is 1-3 years old. Maybe it would have been easier to bring in a cat younger than Rigby.

22 year old college student here too :smile: I understand how stressful a new sick kitten can be. I adopted my kitten Fink who ended up going to the vet so many times I honestly lost track. Tapeworms, parasites, bronchitis... ect... It can get exhausting! Kinda sucks I had to live off of beans and rice for a few weeks, but in the end, definitely worth it! lol

I also had to introduce him to a rowdy puppy, and that took another couple of weeks. They both had to learn their boundaries, and as long as the timid one (the cat in this case) had a safe place to go to, they got along fine.

I think you are doing a great job of keeping them separated, but yet visible to each other. Some cats just take a while to get used to each other. When you let them be in the same room, just try to distract them both with toys or treats.

However, in the end, if you feel that this is a task you just aren't up to, fostering the cat while they look for a new home is fine. It's really just about what is best for the cat.

First- Fink is an adorable name! The rest- thankfully she seems to be rapidly improving with the last vet visit. Honestly, I think Rigby would get along better with a rough and tumble puppy. (I totally intend to get a dog after I'm finished schooling).
The problem is girl-cat doesn't really have a safe place when the whole apartment is open to both of them. I'm trying to make my bedroom a haven for her, but I also made it Rigby's safe spot, so he has no qualms over coming in here and being a jerk.
They both seem to get rather single-minded when they are staring each other down and it's hard for me to tell the difference between playful staring and pouncing and killing staring and pouncing. There is also some concern about Rigby transmitting FIV to girly.
I'm trying to keep the best interests of both cats in mind. I think I'll have to go make an old fashioned pro-con list, huh?

Guess I'm going to be the voice of dissent here. Given your current schedule with school and work, and the massive amount of time and energy both of these cats takes, I would say one of them needs to find a home somewhere else and that's probably going to be the unnamed girl.

Unless you signed some kind of right of first refusal with the rescue, I think your best course of action is to finish her Baytril and find her another home, or find a home that you feel comfortable with them understanding what she needs and being able to commit to doing that. She is beautiful and young, and it shouldn't be too hard to get people interested in her. You can be as picky as you want to be in making sure she goes to a stable and loving home.

Honestly, it just sounds like an awful lot of work, and stress, and untenable situations, for you at a time when you can least afford it. It's totally okay to find another home that will work much better for everyone here.

I did sign a right of first refusal with the rescue. Well, kind of, I'm not entirely sure how well an electronic contract would hold up in court. That's a technicality though, I checked "Agree" under the statement "If I can not keep the pet, I agree to return the pet to {Rescue}". :deal And though it's nice to think a pretty cat is easy to rehome, strolling through craigslist and petfinder and my local spca and petstores with adoption events- well, it's not such an easy task. Certainly no easier than keeping her.
I'm not sure I'm looking for the road of least resistance here. I've made a commitment to her and I intend to honor it. But I've also made a commitment to Rigby and I'm not sure if having her here is honoring that.

First off I want to say how wonderful you are for adopting a FIV cat. There are so many FIV and FeLv cats waiting a long time for forever homes and are over looked.

Just curious, how long did you give for the introduction process?

Here is a good article by Jackson Galaxy.
http://www.littlebigcat.com/behavior/cat-to-cat-introductions/

Cats’ sense when another cat is sick. Not a good time to blend it into the mix until she is feeling better. Then begin. I would start over on the intros. You may have rushed intro too fast.

Rigby sounds like a typical youngster which hasn’t had the training of what the boundaries are in play. Adult cats provide that. They show them the rules in the cat kingdom. Plus they discipline them when they are going too far.

That being said, if you’ve decided not to keep the calico and not to give her more time to become one of the family then my feelings are not to return this cat to the rescue if they had her up for adoption and the cat was sick and had worms.

Every cat we rescue, we deworm whether we see evidence of it or not. We have adopted out, with their meds, cats which were still recovering. But we sent them home with the meds and the option of taking them back to the vet on our dime! Our rescue pays for the visits needed till they are back to health.

We don’t take sick cats to adoption events. But if someone came to our homes, where we foster our cats and like a certain cat which needs medicating then that is how we handle it. So a cat at Petsmart up for adoption with worms and medical issues is suspect to me of the quality of care cats are getting at this rescue. I wouldn’t give them this cat back. Just my humble opinion.

She is a beauty. Her markings are unique! I hope you give her another chance once she is better.

She's been here about four weeks. I kept them separate for a few days but I was panicking so much about if they would eat each other that I let them see each other. They got along ok for a while- but looking back Girl-cat mostly just hid under the couch and Rigby tried to lure her out to play. I noticed Girl-Cat wasn't gaining weight the way I'd hoped, so I re-separated them and then took her to the vet mid-second week. They've been separated until this week.
I've read Galaxy's article- but looking at my recap I don't follow instructions well.

To be fair to the rescue this is her medical history they have listed on their page- still haven't received the vet records though-

Spayed 7/29/12; Rabies shot 7/2012; FVRCP 7/2012: Tested negative for Leukemia 9/8/12
Drontal dose 7/2012; Frontline application 7/2012; Revolution application 8/23/12.
Ears cleaned 7/2012, 8/21/12; Nails trimmed 7/2012

They told me she might have ear mites because she was rubbing at them- I said that ear mites aren't a problem. I still had left over ear cleaning stuff from Rigby's ear mites. Also, they worked really hard with me to make sure she was tested for FeLv before she got to my house. It did concern me that their policy isn't to test every cat, but they say they can't afford it. I didn't have to be an adoption fee though! I guess this is a perfect example of "no such thing as a free animal."

They're probably not the best rescue, and I definitely wouldn't go back to them. But I think they're doing the best they can.


I really appreciate all this input, it's great to hear from all different voices and opinions. I don't feel like I can talk to anyone in "real-life" about this because they'll be judgmental.

Girl-Cat isn't making this any easier, as I type this she's curled up against my hip perfectly content. If only Rigby could be in the room without pouncing. Sigh.

I hope for more input! The jury is still out.

 

[minikin44]

It sounds like Rigby's activity level is too high for hers, but maybe she'll be more active once she's 100% well and feeling settled/secure in her new home. I don't really have any advice, but I do hope it goes well and that they can work it out and be friends before you feel the need to pull all of your hair out. My kitties send their crossed paws your way! Of course, remember, even if they're never bff's, if they can tolerate each other and not be miserable, you'll still be ok.

 

[maggie23]

i understand some of what you're going through. actually, i suppose anyone who has ever tried to intro cats to each other could say that. it would be great if all cats were easy going and just ALL got along without any of the hissing, spitting, growling, etc... but that's asking way too much. they have their own personalities just like people and it's a rare find i think for 2 people to meet and immediately get along.

anyway, we have had our new cat here for 4 weeks now and still have not taken the baby gate down. we had very good intentions of trying it THIS weekend, but we ended up having to take new cat to the emergency vet for an enema! she had to stay overnight and when we got her back home, we didn't feel it was right to let her meet our 1st kitty face to face after all that stress. the intro is not going well for us either. :dis our 1st kitty seems to be one of those that likes to be the only cat in the house unfortunately. she is still hissing and spitting and growling and can not be appeased. however, we remain hopeful - perhaps naively so.

i'll stop my own sob story now, though, because i just had 1 possible suggestion for you. in the Cat vs Cat book, the author suggests getting TWO da birds, so that when the cats are in the same room playing, they EACH have a toy and do not feel like they have to compete for one and worry about pouncing on each other. it will take practice to get good control with both of them at the same time, but it can be done apparently. inevitably, when you notice BOTH cats focusing on the same da bird, you're supposed to slow that one down a little and ramp up the action on the other one to try to get them to look at their own toy again. sounds tricky, i know. but worth a try, huh?

good luck to us all trying to into kitties!!!

 

[kittyhawk]

I used to volunteer for a kitty rescue. What was recommended is to have kitty who was there first have run of the household during the day, while new kitty stays in the bedroom. Then at night, switch. Then take two small towels/rags and rub one on each cat. Place these underneath the opposite cats food bowl. This associates something positive (food) with the new kitty's scent. Then overtime start feeding them on either side of your bedroom door. Then, after you get them to that point, crack the door. If there's no hissing, spitting, weird body language, go for it. At the first sign of a hiss, close the door and continue the routine.

Ive always had success using this method with fosters. It can take anywhere from 7-14 days, but the average is about 10. I fostered a 3 year old spayed female who had no play in her a all with my spunky male cat who was only months old at the time (Rigby's personality reminds me of him to a "T" actually!) and they were grooming each other after 2 weeks. He even got her to play chase sometimes!

Give it a try, it may work! Best of luck!

 

[Foster12]

This situation reminds me of what my sister has gone through. When one of her two cats died, she eventually decided to get a new cat so the one wouldn't be so lonely. The older cat was very shy and reserved, and the new adoptee turned out to be a rambunctious boy. It's been months, and he still pounces on her occassionally, but for the most part they get along well and even snuggle together on the bed often. So, it may just take more time for your two cats to get used to each other. She'll get better at standing her ground, and he'll learn that he's not supposed to overtake her. I wish you luck and patience!

 

[Catlady16]

This sounds so much like my Hyden and when I first brought little Oreo home. Whenever Hyden would get too rough with her (she had a res infection and was pretty sickly too) I would spank him lightly with a fly swat. Enough to say, "No" but not enough to really hurt him. After a few days spent together and fighting/hissing like crazy everything was ok, now they can't be apart. If they're not around each other they'll cry out until the other comes to them. But they have the same temperments. So I think that made it easier. I would let them do it on their own time, don't try to force anythnig. I'd give them their own food trays. What helped me is, I shut my bedroom door at night and all their stuff is in here, so they were locked in a med-large sized room over night. I did here banging and hissing but in the morning they were cuddled up next to me cleaning each other. I wish you luck! I know it can be stressful and I hope everything works out!

 

[twise]

Update

I think I'll be sending this email to her rescue tonight. Does it sound ok?

Subject: Summer- an update

Not a good one, I'm afraid. Summer hates Rigby. She hates when he pounces on her to play. She hates when he tries to chase her. She hates when he tries to jump on the same furniture as her. She wants absolutely nothing to do with him, and poor Rigby is so confused why he's not allowed to do what he wants in his house. He's starting to retaliate. They're both getting very territorial of space and both my mom and I.

I introduced them appropriately following this (Cat-to-Cat Introductions | Little Big Cat) protocol. After two weeks separation I introduced them, but when playing with a toy she writhed on the ground in pain. I swooped her off to the vet and he diagnosed her with a ear infection and put her on three weeks of antibiotics. I kept her separate again for another week until she stopped shaking her head and let them meet again. It's not going well. Rigby is too rambunctious for her. He's too kittenish. She would be better with older cats or maybe no cats at all.

And as cuddly and affectionate as she is, she's not bonding to me either. She sleeps on my bed and likes when I pet her sometimes, but I'm sure she'd feel the same way (probably better) about anyone. I think there's a better home for her than here. I think that she'd like her owner to be home much more often than I am. I don't view our home as a roller-coaster by any means, but there is a bit of coming and going, and she seems a bit overwhelmed by it all.

This is terrible to write, but when I adopted her I promised I'd give her the absolute best life she could ever want and we've come to realize that that her dream life can't be lived here. I've fattened her up, got her coat all nice and glossy, cleared up her ear infection, and had blood work done on her (she wasn't gaining weight as fast as I thought- she was all clear though!) and I think she's ready to find someone that can appreciate her as she is.

She can stay here for a while, if she needs to. I can keep them separated and foster her for a while if it takes time to work things out. I'm so, so sorry she's can't stay here with Rigby. She's such a good cat.

Regretfully,
Tabitha

I feel so... empty. I hope this is the right choice.

 

[minikin44]

I think you are being selfless and putting both of their wellbeing above whatever you may want/wish to happen, and particularly if they let you continue to foster her, both she and Rigby will end up with amazing furever homes, even if only Rigby is with you. That aside, you're obviously and understandably stressed by the situation, and cats can pick up on it, so I'm betting both of them are feeding off of that too. You can't help but be irritated with Summer for being so put off by Rigby, or Rigby for harassing Summer, and that's not god for either of them. In Summer's new home that will hopefully not be an issue, and yours will go back to it's former state of contentment in the near future. I'm glad you mentioned that she'll be better off in a quiet home, possibly without other cats, as this does seem to be the case. I'm also not entirely certain she'd do well with young children, but who knows. At any rate, don't feel bad... you tried, and you're going to make sure Summer gets a great home, and that's all you can do. I'm just sorry it didn't work out and that the three of you had to go through this.

 

[minikin44]

An added thought, you don't need to completely give up on the idea of a second cat... there are some cats that are both young and playful like Rigby needs and cuddly like you would like. Yoshi, my youngest kitten, spends 60% of his time playing with Bear and the other 40% cuddling with either my mom or me, curled up on our laps and purring up a storm (we call him Purr Bucket). I'm not saying you have to try again, but it's not a lost cause just because this experience unfortunately went so poorly.

 

[twise]

That's part of what makes me feel so bad. I totally still want a second cat. It makes me feel like I'm giving up to early on her or that I'm just trading her in to get a "better" cat.
I was browsing at PetSmart today and stopped by the cat adoption center and there were two 11-week old kittens playing- exactly the same way Rigby plays. I think if I were to get another cat I'd go for a younger kitten 3-7 months old. So I feel like I'm trading in a less adoptable cat to get something flashier, you know?

I also feel like I've failed her and that now I need an easy cat cause I'm not worthy of a difficult cat. I don't know, it's just kind of confusing. I certainly won't be bringing hope a new cat until at least winter break to sort out my feelings and to sort out my bond with Rigby.

 

[catloverami]

Summer isn't a good fit for Rigby, or possibly any cat. Calicos are can be possessive of their owner and usually very bossy with other cats and want to be the alpha cat, and when you have a spunky male who won't take "no" for an answer, it will just continue to be a battle between them. I think you're doing the right thing. Likely the perfect home for Summer would be as an only cat, not every cat needs a companion and is happier being the only one and having all the attention. She is adorable, and you're to be commended to getting her the medical attention she needed and getting her in great shape. I wouldn't return her to that rescue, there are others that are better. Good luck!

 

[3furbabies]

I feel for your situation, i too don't think they are a good fit. Your boy cat definitely wants a playmate , but one with the same energy level. I recommend looking for another male the same age or maybe a wee bit younger.

I got my two girls two weeks apart and they were best friends at the rescue who remembered each other right away. They are both 1.5 yrs as well (they are a month apart) and have the same bouncey rambunctious energy your boy has. They chase each other, wrestle and cuddle together, they are completely bonded.

That said, I adopted a 6 y/o girl 5 months after. She is still playful but does not tolerate hyper kitten play. If they try to wrestle her she will smack them and it turns Into a fight if they don't leave her alone. She taught them a lot on adult cat behaviour but they are still young and crazy so I'm glad I got them both together.

 

[twise]

I can't send the e-mail! It's been sitting in my draft folder for the past three days and I can't even look at it!

Girl-Cat managed to kick Rigby out of my room on Monday night and spent the whole night guarding the door. Neither of them seemed to get any rest at all- so I spent the entire day looking at adoptable cats and possible breeds of cats to explore. Then I get home and Girl-Cat is all affectionate. She runs over and greets me. So does Rigby. They don't eat each other, or even attempt to! They did get in a scuffle, both of their ears went alllll the way back and they were very flinchy/twitchy, but no poofy hair! At all!

Is this what life with these two cats is going to be? A celebration for a scuffle instead of a fight? Is there any chance Rigby and Girl-Cat will both mellow and adjust to each other? Or do cat disagreements tend to escalate?

Ok, so say I do return Summer, what guarantee is there that Rigby will get along any better with another cat? Maybe the next cat will be aggressive towards him instead of afraid of him? Girl-Cat's not the best match, but they aren't trying to kill each other. Isn't that the best most people say to realistically hope for? Do I take up the mantra of no blood, no foul?


Ugh, the main reason I don't want to get rid of her is- who would take better care of her than me? A bit cocky, I know, but I feed her Orijen, play with her everyday, brush and clip nails weekly, provide immediate vet care, and do my best to keep her intellectually stimulated. The only thing having a new home could make better for her is not have Rigby. Is sacrificing all the things I do provide her worth the peace of a Rigby-less life? What if a potential new home feeds Fancy Feast, ignores her, doesn't brush her or clip her nails, doesn't notice when she needs a vet, and doesn't play with her? But hey- at least no Rigby! Wouldn't it be preferable for her just to have to learn how to cope with him?

:fust

 

[minikin44]

It's unfortunately only a thing that you can judge as to how much being around each other affects them... I guess you could always give it some more time and then see how things are going?

 

[laurief]

I might be inclined to recommend giving them more time to adjust to each other IF Rigby were healthy. But he's not, and there's a very real possibility that he may have already infected Summer with FIV during their battles. If fur has actually been flying, it's likely that there's also been biting. Where there's biting, there's opportunity for infection with a potentially deadly disease. Is that fair to Summer? I know you have the best intentions toward both of your cats, but you are glossing over the serious health risk for Summer. FIV is not a benign, non-transmittable disease.

Read the following link thoroughly and carefully, and consider its content when deciding Summer's fate. Her life may depend on it.

Transmission of FIV in Friendly Households Modes of Transmission

Laurie