my husband just found out his bff and a close friend of mine as well died in a motorcycle accident. he is off to his brother's house to break the news to him. i'm still in a state of shock and a bit numb, i guess it hasn't totally sank in yet. i don't know what i can do or say to help dh with the pain he's feeling. he bottles it all up and won't talk about it and when he did he tried to blow it off, like it was how he wanted to go and we all have to go sometime etc. this has been his bf for 17+ years. i've only known him for 7, i can't imagine the pain he must be feeling...i hope that while he's with his brother they can grieve some together but idk, they haven't been on the best of terms lately. cisco was like his brother and grew up with them, actually lived with them for a while. i just don't know what to do or say, i don't want to be callous and not mention it or act like it didn't happen but i also don't want to push him to talk if he's not ready. when his g'pa died he never did really talk about it at all. i guess i'm at a loss as to how to balance my grief with his, which must be much much deeper.