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Discussion Starter · #21 ·
Last night, I had a fearful occurence with her. (Only by my side may be)
She was on my nap, and I slowly moved her away because I need to go to kitchen. Then suddenly, she meowed and ran away from me, and she started to stare at me where she stands still. I was afraid to death, because I thought since she was vocal slightly she is going to attack me. I locked myself to the kitchen which has a glass door. She came near to glass door, and staring at me (Her eyes were not dilated), and under the glass door I gave her some treats and she ate the treats. After all she behaved me normal.
I say to myself It is a cat, it is a cat. That is normal....

Since her babyhood, she has some anxiety, running inside of the house, her tail is erected easily (even when she plays a game, Tail is fully up and its hair is on its end).
She used to hiss to strangers, she gets extremely fearful when a glass objects are broken, or things fell down.
After taking prozac I do not see her her tail in erected form, at least while playing.
But with the general anxiety, I do not see any improvement.

We decided to switch to gabapentin? What do you think?
 

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Are these drugs being prescribed by a qualified veterinarian, who knows the cat's entire history and has done a thorough examination of the cat including blood tests?
If not....
I do not think you should be giving ANY medication to this cat unless it is prescribed by a veterinarian. Giving drugs to an animal without full testing to make sure the animal has no conditions that would cause the medication to harm them, and without knowing the exact dosage and what the possible side effects and dangers are, is a very dangerous thing to do. And in general, it is not the best approach to dealing with problems.

What you have is a cat who probably had a difficult life before you took her in from the street. And she has not been able to be relaxed in your home because of noise and some degree of violence. This doesn't mean she needs medication.

This cat primarily needs, as we have discussed before, a calm and quiet and peaceful environment in which to live. giving her drugs can make her problems a lot worse. Prozac, for instance, could have made this worse as it is known to have the effect in some people and in some dogs of, instead of making them better, making them feel crazy. Prozac has driven some human beings into psychotic breaks. Of course it doesn't do this to everyone, but it can happen. If you have given this cat Prozac without a vet's prescription, please stop. And please don't give any other drugs unless told to by a vet after a very thorough examination.
 

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Discussion Starter · #23 ·
@Mosi, Prozac was prescribed by her vet of course. For three months she has been using it after the first attack episode.

Believe or not, I feel guilty about the cat. It could be totally different.
But also I think she needs to calm down and needs mediciation.
She was always anxious before the incident, but I always thought that is normal for a cat.
 

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It is understandable that you would feel guilty -- and you have played a part in creating the situation your cat and you are in. But feeling guilty is not productive, and I would encourage you not to continue with that and instead look to the future. Use that energy on being really kind to the cat and making her life as nice as possible instead of wasting it on feeling bad about yourself.

I have always felt terrible when I have made a mistake with an animal, and this is what I do instead of allowing myself to go around feeling bad. Every time I start to feel bad about something I just make an extra effort to give my animals a good day today, and that helps me and helps them as well.

It is not normal for a cat to be anxious. But it may be normal for this cat, and that could be her personality type or could be because she came from the street and had bad experiences there, and you won't ever know. While obviously I don't generally approve of medications, in this case if the medication is helping, then maybe it's the right thing. If it is not helping, though, then discuss trying something different with your vet. Prozac can help or it can harm, and it depends on the individual which it does, whether it is person or animal. But even with medication, this cat primarily needs a peaceful environment. So when you start feeling guilty, just focus your energy on being a peaceful home.
 

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Watching the videos, which will contain all of his advice, is a lot cheaper than a $1,200 Zoom consult.
 

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Discussion Starter · #29 ·
Her vet and behaviorist prescribed her gabapentin, and after giving her the gabapentin he told me to introduce my husband to our cat.
I am scaring to death because a possible new agression/attack episode.

@miscellaneous and @Mosi thanks for detailed description for the introduction. I hope I can apply your advices without being hurt.
 

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The way not to be hurt or to make things worse is to take this whole thing VERY, VERY SLOWLY. I cannot emphasize that enough.

Your vet is wrong to think that taking a medication will solve it and you should go ahead with bringing your husband back close to the cat. You need to take very tiny slow steps as we have said. The Jackson Galaxy videos on YouTube are free and really there is nothing more you would gain from paying him for an individual consult, anyway. You have all of the info you need, and if you want encouragement, let us support you. If you want demonstrations, go to YouTube and watch Jackson.

You will do fine if you just don't rush it. If you take it super slow there is nothing to be afraid of. Please know this whole process might take many months, even a year. But it will be worth it in the end.
 

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Discussion Starter · #31 ·
Through this week, few times They have seen each other for a second. (By mistake)
1. She saw my husband for a few seconds, he was coming home. She looked curious no sign of agressiveness.
2. She saw my husband thoough glass door for a few seconds, She did not show any sign of agressiveness?

What do you think about to introduce them through glass dooor? Would it be ok?

@miscellaneous, yes we need courage....for introduction...
 

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Introducing them through the glass door sounds OK. BUT, you have only barely started this process so please do not rush ahead of yourself!

You could use the glass door instead of the door in the hallway for a while, but eventually you will have to go to the hallway door and start the process there at the beginning because, as you have said, there is something about the hallway combined with your husband that triggers her.

My guess is maybe the hallway feels like a confined place for her and that is the reason. Remember to make the hallway a nice place for her, with treats and petting, and when he opens that door a tiny crack for a moment for her to see your husband just for a second, be sure that nothing is blocking her exit from the hallway so she can run if she needs to.
 

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Discussion Starter · #33 ·
...Update...

For two days, she has been seeing my husband behind the glass door. He goes to balcony, and sees the cat.
She is not interested at all.

Other times, she has been waiting in front of the door where my husband has been in. and meows.

I think that it is nonsense that my husband looks at her though glass door. Because she sees the balcony as not a part of the house, and she knows that husband will not enter from the balcony into the living room.

So she feels safe.
 

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Discussion Starter · #34 ·
@Mosi, @miscellaneous what do you think? Any suggestions?

Update from today.

My husband and she met on the hallway today... He was holding a rod toy (My husband because of panic not able to use it well) But she was not interested in toy, she was more interested in my husband., (generally she is interested in rod toy)

I am not sure at all but she turned out to be aggressive and my husband left the place.

All those happened in a minute.
I lost my hope...
 

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@Mosi, @miscellaneous what do you think? Any suggestions?


I am not sure at all but she turned out to be aggressive and my husband left the place.

All those happened in a minute.
I lost my hope...
Less than a month ago, I said this to you:
"You will do fine if you just don't rush it. If you take it super slow there is nothing to be afraid of. Please know this whole process might take many months, even a year. But it will be worth it in the end. "
and I also said: "The way not to be hurt or to make things worse is to take this whole thing VERY, VERY SLOWLY. I cannot emphasize that enough. "

miscellanious also suggested to you that you make progress very slowly.

This latest incident has happened, I am almost certain, because you rushed the process. You rushed ahead, in less than 4 weeks, to having direct contact with your husband ---too soon--- and the aggression happened again.

This is a set-back. You need to start over if you want this to work, and this time don't rush ahead.
I am afraid I don't understand why you would lose hope when you did not take the long and very slow and gradual progression that this situation needs.
The fact that your cat was aggressive again is due to this, combined with your husband's nervousness, which also happened because the process has not been very slow and gradual over the course of months. Your husband needs to become gradually comfortable with the cat as well as her becoming comfortable with him. I am sorry this happened, babyslim, but I have given you my very best advice in detail and if you are for some reason unable to follow the advice I honestly don't know what else I can do to help.
 

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Discussion Starter · #36 ·
Hello, You are right Mosi.
Since she does not react her though glass door, I thought that we can go to next step.
Meanwhile, I could not find a home for her....

Today while we playing with her in the hallway (for a month we play in the hallway, I purchased some cat stuff for there). He opened the door just for a second, and put a dish of treats on the grounds.

..........Her tail become erected and puffed..... Once she saw her.

And I saw the setback.
We should have started from this. Not from the direct contact.

Do you think should I give a break? Or continue like that everyday?
 

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Since she does not react her though glass door, I thought that we can go to next step.
babyslim,

When you mentioned the glass door, my response to you 10 days ago was:
"Introducing them through the glass door sounds OK. BUT, you have only barely started this process so please do not rush ahead of yourself! "

If you still want to keep this cat you need to back up to the very beginning, which means that your husband should not have reached out any part of his body from the door at all. I was specific about that. Having him do that is not the beginning, but many steps along, so again you have rushed the process.

It will probably now take longer to get to where you want to get, if you actually ever do get there, because of this recent setback. Also, having your husband reach out from the door is still another case of rushing ahead, and another setback on top of the last one.

The advice I gave initially is all I can say. It is entirely your choice of course whether or not you decide to follow it, but as I said before I really do not think I can help you any more if you choose to do something different from my advice, because it's the best I have.

To be honest, I do not know at this point if this will work or not. Due to her having freaked out again, she may never be comfortable with your husband at all. But no one can predict the future. You can try what I suggest if you want to, and find out if, in another year or so, she is comfortable with him or not. I would not anticipate at this point that this would take less than six months. If you rush the process again, it may mean that this is not going to work out at all. As I said, it is up to you. I wish you luck.
 

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Is your cat still on Gabapentin, and if so, have you seen any improvement? Are you and your husband able to deal with your cat in a calm and relaxed manner? Were you able to watch the Jackson Galaxy videos on Youtube about cat aggression?
 

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Discussion Starter · #39 ·
Hello @miscellaneous , yes I have started to watch Jackson Galaxy series. (I have completed the most relevant ones). He has some introduction videos...
She has been using prozac for four months (first two months 0.5 ml, second two months 1 ml). A lot of people told me Prozac may take time to work (at least 8 weeks) so I decided to wait a little before switching to gabapentin.
But I feel that she is still anxious, and in our case Prozac does not work I think.

My vet gave me gabapentin which will go for only 12 days; and I dont know what to do afterwards. So I hesitate to use it.


@Mosi For a month my husband lives in a single room. He has to text me to go to toilet. When I leave the house, he has to leave as well because he can not live in his own house.... Unintentionally, I may have rushed; because we can not leave like that for a year....

Now she stands in front of the door of room that my husband in, meows like begging and trying to open the door.!! That 's unbearable at the moment.

There is an update; I find a place for her. One of my relative lives in a forest in mountains (There is only one highway faraway the house) He feeds 7 cats in his garden. The only thing make me think that he may leave that place 7 months later. (It is not certain yet) .
 

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Discussion Starter · #40 ·
And one more question?
If she is afraid of him, and not feel comfortable with him, then why she always meows in front of the room that he is in?
Are there any explanations for that?
 
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