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We have 3 almost 4 year old cats, all from separate litters born just a few months of each other and we’ve had them since they were all 4-6months old 2 males and 1 female. All spayed and neutered. And we are at our wits end with our more dominant male. He was taken from his mom very young was raised as an orphan but spent the first few months of his life in a house with a lot of cats.


About a year ago he started exhibiting dominant behavior towards our much smaller female cat. This includes sitting on her, aggressive licking and grooming, biting her neck, stalking, and swatting at her. Initially it was here or there but now it’s every day sometimes this goes on for hours. We try to redirect their attention but ultimately we end up frustrated an annoyed and the only thing that keeps him from going after her is us showing him a spray bottle. We don’t use it much but if he sees it he will usually walk away for a bit. I want to do as much positive reinforcement as possible but when it’s constant it’s hard. Our female cat will just hiss non stop when he even remotely gets in her space. We have a small house but they have the run of the house plus the whole basement. Multiple cat trees, couches, beds, toys and more. We play with them frequently. We are trying the Feliway diffusers and I ordered calming collars but at this point it’s affecting our sleep and mine and my husbands relationship. I don’t want to have to give the cat up but I don’t know how much more we can take.

Any ideas? I thought about an additional litter box we have two large boxes but there is never an issue directly around the box or with spraying thankfully. They each have their own food bowls for wet and dry food, multiple water dishes. All of them get plenty of attention. The dominant male has been to the vet several times and he does have bad stomatitis that he gets treated for but even when he gets antibiotics and a steroid for the inflammation he still acts like this, other then that he is healthy.
 

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Some cats are bullies toward one particular cat. They may grow out of it or not. You could try and do some "catification" to your house, with shelving up higher as escape routes for your small female. Oftentimes that can solve the problem of sharing the space. Some pet stores and others have special shelving.
 
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