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Welcome to the forum! I'm sure you'll get lots to think about here. Look forward to seeing pictures of your cats.
Thx for your welcome! This is in fact a rather difficult period in my life. My ignorance has claimed one life & if I don't learn fast, I suspect another may be lost. I was forced to take on two adult cats in December when the owner threatened to euthanise them if nobody wanted them. I knew nothing about the gradual introduction of cats. My shoebox apt became a warzone every single day & my elderly resident cat Baby died from a stress-induced stroke last month. Since then my other resident cat Felicity has been crying day & nite & spraying all over the place, the back of my hand being her favourite spray spot. My vet is not too optimistic about a solution because spaying a cat many years post sexual maturity may not cure the spraying problem. And Feliwell is a 'hit or miss' phenomenon. The loss of Baby has turned me into a remorse-laden wreck for whom euthanisation will never be an option. So I really need advice on living with a spraying cat for >10yrs. Any suggestion will be greatly appreciated. I will start a post on this topic after I've done my research on this forum. TIA
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Hi and welcome to the forum,
First off I would have to say that, in my opinion, you are being unreasonably hard on yourself. If your cat was elderly maybe she was going to have the stroke anyway, nobody knows.
You did a very good thing by taking in those two cats. Very few people would have done that - give yourself credit - that was a huge thing you did. I think it really stinks that someone would tell a cat lover (like yourself) that they were going to euthanize their cats "if nobody wanted them". What kind of crap is that? Why didn't they want them? That sounds like manipulation to me. They knew you would probably take them in.
It sounds like you still have all three cats, don't you? If so, I don't think it would be a bad thing to give up one or both of the new-comers to a no-kill shelter so you and your kitty can return to peace. You said you live in a "shoebox apartment" so having 3 or 4 cats sucks for the cats and you. I don't think giving them up would be unreasonable at all.
Just so you don't feel alone I will tell you that I am feeling really stupid and guilty about the death of my cat. I let some vet. give her a rabies vaccine when she was an indoor only cat, was stressed out, and was recovering from a severe food allergy. We had to put her down 3 weeks later when she had full-blown lympho-sarcoma. After a while I will be writing the vet. and discussing it here - not yet though - I just wanted to let you know that what happened to you could have happened to anyone.
This forum is a place to talk about very emotional, difficult situations, as well as happy, fun situations. I am sure you will have some of those happy, fun situations to discuss soon. Keep us posted on how things are going for you. Take care, Chuck
First off I would have to say that, in my opinion, you are being unreasonably hard on yourself. If your cat was elderly maybe she was going to have the stroke anyway, nobody knows.
You did a very good thing by taking in those two cats. Very few people would have done that - give yourself credit - that was a huge thing you did. I think it really stinks that someone would tell a cat lover (like yourself) that they were going to euthanize their cats "if nobody wanted them". What kind of crap is that? Why didn't they want them? That sounds like manipulation to me. They knew you would probably take them in.
It sounds like you still have all three cats, don't you? If so, I don't think it would be a bad thing to give up one or both of the new-comers to a no-kill shelter so you and your kitty can return to peace. You said you live in a "shoebox apartment" so having 3 or 4 cats sucks for the cats and you. I don't think giving them up would be unreasonable at all.
Just so you don't feel alone I will tell you that I am feeling really stupid and guilty about the death of my cat. I let some vet. give her a rabies vaccine when she was an indoor only cat, was stressed out, and was recovering from a severe food allergy. We had to put her down 3 weeks later when she had full-blown lympho-sarcoma. After a while I will be writing the vet. and discussing it here - not yet though - I just wanted to let you know that what happened to you could have happened to anyone.
This forum is a place to talk about very emotional, difficult situations, as well as happy, fun situations. I am sure you will have some of those happy, fun situations to discuss soon. Keep us posted on how things are going for you. Take care, Chuck
Thx Chuck! Thx for your encouragement. I have written the reason why I took in the two adult cats & the exact circumstances in which Baby died in my other thread:" Spraying cats-are they all eventually euthanised?" in the Behaviour Forum. Perhaps then you will understand why there is so much guilt here.
In this part of Asia, there are no no-kill shelters. Or I would have taken the two white cats there in Dec when I was given notice. Or even earlier in 2005, when I picked up a litter of 3 kittens in a wet market here. I gave two to the previously mentioned owner & kept the third one since I wasn't able to rehome her. She was named Felicity to denote the luck she had when new-born kittens probably die by the dozen every day.
Thx for sharing the story of your cat here. I can feel your pain & anger when you have mistakenly placed your trust in sb you shouldn't. But I guess most of us would think one vet is as good as another. So I don't think you were really at fault. You should have a clear conscience & time will heal your sorrow.
I am now trying my best to save Felicity. And if one day Felicity stops spraying, I will be the first to share my experience on how to stop a cat spraying here. And I will share those "happy,fun" moments too. But until then, I am staring at Felicity with teary eyes.
In this part of Asia, there are no no-kill shelters. Or I would have taken the two white cats there in Dec when I was given notice. Or even earlier in 2005, when I picked up a litter of 3 kittens in a wet market here. I gave two to the previously mentioned owner & kept the third one since I wasn't able to rehome her. She was named Felicity to denote the luck she had when new-born kittens probably die by the dozen every day.
Thx for sharing the story of your cat here. I can feel your pain & anger when you have mistakenly placed your trust in sb you shouldn't. But I guess most of us would think one vet is as good as another. So I don't think you were really at fault. You should have a clear conscience & time will heal your sorrow.
I am now trying my best to save Felicity. And if one day Felicity stops spraying, I will be the first to share my experience on how to stop a cat spraying here. And I will share those "happy,fun" moments too. But until then, I am staring at Felicity with teary eyes.
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I don't think it's your fault that Baby passed away.
Has Felicity only been spraying since the loss of baby? Or was she spraying before this? I think I remember reading in your other thread that you're having her de-sexed soon. This may help. It may not. Cat's can spray for different reasons. The vet is also right, if it's an ingrained bahaviour it may be harder to stop. That being said, the first thing I would recommend for any spraying cat is spay/neuter. Another thing that may help is Feliway. If I were in your position, I would try the Feliway plug in and that may help to calm her down and in turn not feel the need to spray.
Has Felicity only been spraying since the loss of baby? Or was she spraying before this? I think I remember reading in your other thread that you're having her de-sexed soon. This may help. It may not. Cat's can spray for different reasons. The vet is also right, if it's an ingrained bahaviour it may be harder to stop. That being said, the first thing I would recommend for any spraying cat is spay/neuter. Another thing that may help is Feliway. If I were in your position, I would try the Feliway plug in and that may help to calm her down and in turn not feel the need to spray.
Thx love.my.cats. Felicity indeed sprayed around Baby's death. That was the period when the stress of the 4 cats were at a peak. Both females will be spayed next week. Feliway diffuser has been on since end of Feb. Hope Felicity stops spraying.
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I'm really hoping for you that with them both spayed, the spraying stops.
Another thing you could try is to create some hiding places and boundaries in your apartment. If you have an open plan space, could you arrange furniture or put a screen up so that the room is divided in some way. This might help the cats establish their own area where they feel more secure. Also, give them lots of hiding places and cat trees so that they have somewhere to escape to when they feel threatened.
I hope things improve soon. You have done a great thing by trying to save these cats!
I hope things improve soon. You have done a great thing by trying to save these cats!
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