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Hi i adopted my Harley 3 weeks to this day...
She is a bengal/abysinnian mix...
its been 3 weeks and she continues to just hide under the bed ive given her space most of the time and she has gotten better 1st week she only came out when the house was silent 2nd week every time i enter the room she just starts hissing but if i just stay there shell eventually meow(shes under the bed the whole time) and i know its okay to enter and feed,3rd week ive think a lot pof progress has happened shes 1/2 way out of the bed when i come in still hisses though every time i enter but if i sit in my pc chair shell play around with a 5 feet distance between us though but she bolts every time i get up or move towards her this morning was the first time i got to touch her she woke me up at 5 she was on my bed next to me i fed her and i layed down again and she actually let me rub her a bit she looks uneasy when i touch her but i rubbed her for a good 10 minutes she just continues to nibble at me times after wards went back to the whole dont approach me stage so am i doing something wrong? or shall i continue to practice patience?...
never had a cat take this long to warm up
quick info that i know of her she was at a shelter for 3 months not sure if that makes a difference
the pic attached is old but she doesnt sit still yet but i attached a small vid in the meet my kitty section sorry for the long post just wanted it detailed
 

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I am no expert but progress is progress. I have my abandoned cats a year and they still get spooked by me if I walk fast, sudden, and loud noises. But they also show lots of affection too but it took time.
 

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Your other post says she is now about 6 mos old, right? Having spent almost half her little life at a shelter, I'm guessing she is just having a hard time adjusting. Some cats are just super sensitive. As long as you have ruled out medical, my guess is she will come around. Are you leaving food out for her to free feed or are you offering her food but making her come to you to get it (which I would do vs free feed)??
 

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I would just give it a bit more time. She needs to learn to trust people, so just be patient. Do you have some good toys to play with her (and lure her out of hiding)? I would recommend something with a wand (like Da Bird) that's interactive. Cats like to hunt naturally, so something she can chase and pounce on is good.
 

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She probably never really socialized. My friend has a cat who was living in the attic and never seen for the first few months. They knew she was ok because the food was gone. :) eventually she came around and slowly trusting her people and her surrounding.
 

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Sepideh came to me an adult cat who had been with a family since she was a baby, so well socialised. It took almost 3 months before she would come sit as close as on the other end of the sofa from me, at about 6 months she started occasionally using me as stairs to get to one side of the sofa from the other, and by 10 months she began to come and cuddle on the arm of the sofa beside me and likes to be patted. She still won't be held or picked up - she doesn't fight it, but she freezes and pins her ears back and is clearly unhappy. She is still very twitchy about sudden movements or noises.

Oddly there were two visitors in that time that she just took to immediately - she actually went and sat on their knees, which she's still only ever done to me once. Everyone else who visited has triggered a "hide under the sofa for the entire day" episode, although lately she's started peeking out after an hour or so and even relaxing in the same room, albeit far out of reach of anyone.

Sune came from the same home and is a total people lover, so it's not just that she wasn't socialised, I think she just has a nervous personality, and was quite traumatised by moving. I don't think you're doing anything wrong at all.

Which is to say, even with a socialised cat, it can take a long time (and I think if she's already approaching you, she's going to be a lot quicker than Sepideh). It was worth the wait and the patience, she may not ever sit on my knee, but she's my constant little pal around the house, always near and checking out what I'm up to, and now and then curling up right next to me for petting.
 

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yep, it took my Abby a year before she totally trusted me enough to kiss her belly, but she was 11 years old when I adopted her. She'll come around, just continue to be patient.
 

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Discussion Starter #9
Your other post says she is now about 6 mos old, right? Having spent almost half her little life at a shelter, I'm guessing she is just having a hard time adjusting. Some cats are just super sensitive. As long as you have ruled out medical, my guess is she will come around. Are you leaving food out for her to free feed or are you offering her food but making her come to you to get it (which I would do vs free feed)??
i would free feed her in the morning before i go to work..

but make her come to when i got home
 

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Sepideh came to me an adult cat who had been with a family since she was a baby, so well socialised. It took almost 3 months before she would come sit as close as on the other end of the sofa from me, at about 6 months she started occasionally using me as stairs to get to one side of the sofa from the other, and by 10 months she began to come and cuddle on the arm of the sofa beside me and likes to be patted. She still won't be held or picked up - she doesn't fight it, but she freezes and pins her ears back and is clearly unhappy. She is still very twitchy about sudden movements or noises.

Oddly there were two visitors in that time that she just took to immediately - she actually went and sat on their knees, which she's still only ever done to me once. Everyone else who visited has triggered a "hide under the sofa for the entire day" episode, although lately she's started peeking out after an hour or so and even relaxing in the same room, albeit far out of reach of anyone.

Sune came from the same home and is a total people lover, so it's not just that she wasn't socialised, I think she just has a nervous personality, and was quite traumatised by moving. I don't think you're doing anything wrong at all.

Which is to say, even with a socialised cat, it can take a long time (and I think if she's already approaching you, she's going to be a lot quicker than Sepideh). It was worth the wait and the patience, she may not ever sit on my knee, but she's my constant little pal around the house, always near and checking out what I'm up to, and now and then curling up right next to me for petting.
Thanks for the info its real funny with this little one i sometimes feel like im getting no where with her then suddenly today she throws me for a loop and starts doing the raised butt thing at first i was shocked since shes spayed then i read it could mean that shes trying to show trust/friendship shes already started jumping on my lap for short periods and letting me carry her only odd thing is ive never seen a cat want so much attention took me almost 20 minute to write this reply because she keeps jumping on me trying to get near my face...
 

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Thanks for the info its real funny with this little one i sometimes feel like im getting no where with her then suddenly today she throws me for a loop and starts doing the raised butt thing at first i was shocked since shes spayed then i read it could mean that shes trying to show trust/friendship shes already started jumping on my lap for short periods and letting me carry her only odd thing is ive never seen a cat want so much attention took me almost 20 minute to write this reply because she keeps jumping on me trying to get near my face...
Maybe she is inviting you to sniff her but! :idea

Sounds funny, but animals do this to each other and when it's invited it's a compliment!! I'm glad she is coming around. I think you will find there will be more and more days like this. Some cats just take awhile to settle in. Personally I think the hardest won love is the sweetest!!
 
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