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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I replied earlier to a post in behavior "cat behavior problem..help getting frustrated" by liontammer. I was really not trying to sound rude and he took it that way I think. I sent a pm and explained my wording better.

Do you think my original post was typed badly? How do we handle a situation like this normally?

Thanks for suggestions.
 

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I thought you were clear and polite and he didn't really seem to take offense. It seemed to me that he just didn't want to get jumped on like someone else did (I'm assuming he's talking about Catnip, although I thought we were all pretty supportive).
 

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I think seeing his own words, "grab them and toss them" made him realize how bad that made him look. When I saw that, I was tempted to post. I didn't, however, because if more than one mod says something in disagreement, the membership takes it as "ganging up on the membership." You'd be surprised how many times I have written and rewritten an answer so that I come across as supportive, even when the person has done something that is absolutely wrong, not just an honest difference of opinion. I'm not always successful, but I really try. I have been around too many "power hungry" mods--NOT here, though!

It's difficult to be diplomatic enough to educate the member without sounding bossy or aggressive. The members expect more of us than other members. Unless someone can play peacemaker when a member gets upset with another mod, I don't think it's wise for another mod to comment. It's best to use Dale Carnegie's method: compliment (sincerely) first; then diplomatically explain how they could do something more successfully.

Lilly, you were not at all nasty. His words were nasty, and I think they hit him right in the face.

One thing I do quite a bit (if there's time) is to research the subject on the internet and post a link that shows how the experts handle a situation, or just to let them see the facts for themselves.

That doesn't always work either. I am really tired of cetain members arguing with Dr. Jean on medical matters! I usually say, "Did you know that drjean is not just an online name, that she is a veterinarian? " I would rather look like a "bad guy" than lose her. I don't know of another cat forum who has a vet to advise their members!
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
That is true Jeanie! Dr.Jean is a very important part of this forum. I like knowing she is avaliable to answer questions if needed.
Thanks for input. :D
 
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