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Discussion Starter #1
Prince was much more than a cat for me, he was my only friend and family. I thought he had an upset stomach, he died of a tumor in his digestive system this dawn. I was always afraid that might happen, and what I'd do. It feels like the emptiness will never be filled again.
 

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Oh, I am so sorry. It is so fresh and I am afraid you will feel like this for awhile but it will get better. I related to exactly what you said. My little dog was with me all the time for 16 years. As he got older I did worry how will I handle it when he passes. Life has a way of going along and two cats came into my life unplanned. I still get reminded of him and feel so sad but life does go on. I hope that something special comes into your life to help you deal with the pain. As much as you loved, Prince, I am sure he felt it and loved you. Now he is not in pain. I am so sorry.
 

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I'm so very sorry for your loss! You gave Prince a full and wonderful life and I'm sure he loved you every bit as much as you did him.

Run free over the bridge Prince and Mommy will will be there some day to give you more jowl rubs!
 

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I'm so sorry for your loss of Prince. Just know that your baby is no longer suffering, and try to take solace in that. Right now, I know it feels like your heart is broken, but in time, it will heal and allow you to move on. (((Hugs)))
 

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Discussion Starter #5
He got steroids as part of his dental treatment last week, it's likely the steroids caused the crisis, according to the vets. He might've lived longer, otherwise. It was all so fast.
 

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Please don't try to blame yourself or think you could have somehow known. We all have regrets with the way we've handled situations with our pets. Unfortunately, they can't tell us when something is wrong, so we have to rely on the experts to guide us, and even they make mistakes. There is no way you could have known he had a tumor. It might not feel like it now, but this could be a blessing for him, and might have saved him from months of pain and suffering down the road.
 

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I'm so sorry for the loss of Prince. I hope he is playing in the sunshine on the other side of the bridge. I hope your other cats give you extra snuggles today.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
Yes, I feel guilty that I didn't have him checked before, or more. But his bloodwork results were perfect even a couple hours before passing. The vets aren't even sure what the thing was, because he died before being stabilized enough to undergo the operation, so they didn't get to see it except in X-rays and ultrasound.

I also feel guilty that I left him at the vet's overnight hospitalized and went home to sleep as told by the vets. He died alone. And it's very hard for me that I didn't get to say a final good-bye.

I also feel guilty that I gave up one of the kittens someone found, for adoption. Because I have a superstition that if you give up a cat because you have too many, then one of the resident cats dies. I told this to a friend last week, and said I was afraid something might happen to Prince.
 

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Discussion Starter #10
housefrau, I never came to this forum, that's how afraid I was. I always said to everyone that "the day Prince goes, I go too". And I meant it. But now I have 3 house cats and 10 strays that depend on me for survival. So I can't escape. I have to be strong. And I don't feel like being strong. I don't want to get used to Prince not being there anymore.
 

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I'm so very sorry, and those words just seem so inadequate. I know how much I love my babies too, and I know that I will be just like you when I lose one of mine. I am 44 and never have really lost a cat. I had a cat that was part mine that went with an ex boyfriend when I got married, and he died at 14, but he hadn't been with me for 10 years. I lost a dog 6 years ago, that hurt, but I am a cat person. I have 3 cats, plus my feral that depends on me, and I know that when I do lose one of them one day, I will be just like you. I don't know how I will go on, but I will have to find a way too. Yes, you are right, you have your other cats and all of your stray babies that depend on you, so you have to. It's the hardest part about loving these little creatures, is that they just don't live long enough. My oldest cat is now 11 years old, Beep, and she was in great health at her last physical, bloodwork was great, but she is starting to show signs of age, doesn't jump up as well as she used to on high tables, and just thinking of her not being here one day makes me cry. She is my husbands baby too, he never even liked cats before her. Now, she follows him like a puppy and clings to him like glue. He just went out of town for a week, and she wanders the house looking for him when he isn't here, like a dog.

What you do for all of your babies is wonderful. Caring for all of those strays, and loving the ones that you have. And they would not want you to be so sad. Think of how cats get when you are sad. Most cats have a reaction. One of my cats will come up and start mewing at me if I'm crying, another one will paw at my face and lightly bite me to get me to stop. Cats know when you are upset and they don't like it one bit. Your Prince would not want you to be so sad like this. So you have to be strong for the others. They still need you.

My heart is so sad for you. When I know a person is sad that was such a loving, caring cat person as you are, and they lose one of theirs, it really gets to me, and I'm just so sorry and sad for you. You will need your time to hurt and mourn, but I hope that for the sake of the others, you are able to keep taking care of yourself so that you can be there for your other babies. ((((Hugs)))) to you, I just can't imagine how hard it is, but know that I am thinking of you and hope that you will find some comfort in your other kitties being around you right now.
 

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I am really sorry for your loss. There was no way you could have known there was something wrong. It is not your fault. He knew you loved him and always wanted the best for him. Hang in there.
 

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If he had a tumor in his intestines, was acting normal, and had normal bloodwork, there is really no way you (or the vet) could have known and predicted what would happen. I've had cats pass away by themselves too, and I blamed myself for it and felt so guilty and was very hard on myself. Please don't blame yourself. I know it's hard to not feel guilty and question decisions you made, but you have to forgive yourself at some point (trust me, I know it's easier said than done). It's very clear that you loved your Prince dearly, and I'm sure he knew that! I'm sure all of your other kitties know this too!
 

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Discussion Starter #16
The vet said they wanted to do an autopsy (their own initiative, not our request), so tomorrow I'm going to call and ask the results. The vets were absolutely wonderful all along, and so highly professional and concerned, I'm astonished to have received such good service in this primitive Middle East. :) Maybe it's because my friend led the whole thing, and she's a very influential personality in cat rescue in this country, and at the same time unforgiving but of the highest professionalism for cats. No political titles, just an angel that spends 15 hours every day rescuing cats. She took care of everything for me. She adored Prince.
 

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Oh I'm so sorry to hear this. I think you are so special for taking care of the stray kitties the way you do, it just makes me so sad. RIP Prince and please take care of yourself Straysmommy.
 

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Yes, I feel guilty ...."

Please just knock that guilt right away. You did everything that was right at the time. I do that and go back with the guilt---it is a destroyer. There is no "right." There is no perfect. Vets don't know everything, people don't know everything. You did what you thought was right. You did what you could. You loved your Prince and provided for him. Don't torture yourself.
 
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