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livememe.com - Aristocat


"To go outside, and there perchance to stay Or to remain within: that is the question:

Whether 'tis better for a cat to suffer The cuffs and buffets of inclement weather That Nature rains on those who roam abroad, Or take a nap upon a scrap of carpet, And so by dozing melt the solid hours That clog the clock's bright gears with sullen time And stall the dinner bell.

To sit, to stare Outdoors, and by a stare to seem to state A wish to venture forth without delay, Then when the portal's opened up, to stand As if transfixed by doubt.

To prowl; to sleep; To choose not knowing when we may once more Our readmittance gain: aye, there's the hairball; For if a paw were shaped to turn a knob, Or work a lock or slip a window-catch, And going out and coming in were made As simple as the breaking of a bowl, What cat would bear the houselhold's petty plagues, The cook's well-practiced kicks, the butler's broom, The infant's careless pokes, the tickled ears, The trampled tail, and all the daily shocks That fur is heir to, when, of his own will, He might his exodus or entrance make With a mere mitten?

Who would spaniels fear, Or strays trespassing from a neighbor's yard, But that the dread of our unheeded cries And scraches at a barricaded door No claw can open up, dispels our nerve And makes us rather bear our humans' faults Than run away to unguessed miseries?

Thus caution doth make house cats of us all; And thus the bristling hair of resolution Is softened up with the pale brush of thought, And since our choices hinge on weighty things, We pause upon the threshold of decision.”

― Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse
 

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Dave, this so cool...Thank you for sharing!!
 

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Discussion Starter #4
It must be passed around. When I did the Google I found the author on Amazon with excerpts that make me almost want to buy it to read his re-write of Poe, "The End of The Raven"


"Do not go gentle to that **** vet/ Hide, hide when your appointment date is set" ?



"Grendel's Dog," from "Beocat":
. . . Then boasted Beocat, noble battle-kitten, Bane of barrow-bunnies, bold seeker of nest-booty: . . . I would lay the whelpling low with lethal claw-blows; Fur would fly and the foe would taste death-food . . . Or, from a later period, William Blake's cat's poem, "The Mongrel":

Mongrel! Mongrel! Barking blight, Bane upon my yard at night; What infernal hand or eye, Could frame thy vile anatomy?
 

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This will be on my winter read list!! ;)
 

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Discussion Starter #6
Okay. Copyright violation here I come.

The End of the Raven


The End of the Raven
by Edgar Allen Poe's Cat

On a night quite unenchanting,
when the rain was downward slanting,
I awakened to the ranting
of the man I catch mice for.

Tipsy and a bit unshaven,
in a tone I found quite craven,
Poe was talking to a Raven perched
above the chamber door.

"Raven's very tasty," thought I,
as I tiptoed o'er the floor,
"There is nothing I like more".

Soft upon the rug I treaded,
calm and careful as I headed
Towards his roost atop that dreaded
bust of Pallas I deplore.

While the bard and birdie chattered,
I made sure that nothing clattered,
Creaked, or snapped, or fell, or shattered,
as I crossed the corridor;

For his house is crammed with trinkets,
curios and weird decor -
Bric-a-brac and junk galore.

Still the Raven never fluttered,
standing stock-still as he uttered,
In a voice that shrieked and sputtered,
his two cents' worth - "Nevermore."

While this dirge the birdbrain kept up,
oh, so silently I crept up,
Then I crouched and quickly leapt up,
pouncing on the feathered bore.

Soon he was a heap of plumage,
and a little blood and gore-
Only this and not much more.

"Oooo!" my pickled poet cried out,
"Pussycat, it's time I dried out!
Never sat I in my hideout
talking to a bird before.

How I've wallowed in self-pity,
while my gallant, valiant kitty
Put and end to that damned ditty" -
then I heard him start to snore.

Back atop the door I clambered,
eyed that statue I abhor,
Jumped - and smashed it on the floor.
 

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Ah Man, that's Great!
I don't think there's copyright violations if the author is included, and that its from such and such source!! ;)
 
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