Cat Forum banner

1 - 13 of 13 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,370 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
I'm so tired of listening to the guy downstairs scream at his wife. This is not normal arguing, it is SCREAMING!!! I've said something to them before about how I can hear them, but obviously, they don't care. The sad thing is they just had a baby the week of Christmas, so they are subjecting an innocent person to this nonsense (okay, three people including my boyfriend and I). I just couldn't imagine my boyfriend screaming at me like that -- and staying with him? There's definitely something wrong with the guy, but the girl has to be mental to stay with him.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
12,197 Posts
If it's screaming only, you should talk to the apartment manager. They deal with complaints about noise. If you hear him hitting her, or see any physical evidence that he's done so, you should immediately call the police.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,564 Posts
In defense of the woman, you don't know what he's threatened her with or what her situation is, so I wouldn't necessarily consider her mental. Plus she just had a baby and is probably not feeling 100% and is very vulnerable right now. Typically right after having a baby is not the ideal time to leave your husband.

Having been through a similar situation, I can tell you that the best thing for this woman would be for you to call the police. Often, it's difficult to do this type of thing yourself while in a situation like this and having someone else to have seen, heard or witnessed something is often a blessing in disguise. If he finds out that she called the police herself, he's likely to do more damage to her whether it be physical or emotional.

I feel for her, it's a terrible position to be in and you can never understand unless you've been there.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,370 Posts
Discussion Starter #4
Fortunately, I haven't been in the situation -- I was just saying, I can't imagine someone screaming at me like that or imagine putting up with it. It isn't something new either -- they were screamers from the day they moved in last May.

But you're right, the next time, the police will be called.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,564 Posts
Hippyhart said:
Fortunately, I haven't been in the situation -- I was just saying, I can't imagine someone screaming at me like that or imagine putting up with it.
I see what you are saying, I only felt the need to acknowledge it because you said she "has to be mental" and that's not true.

Hippyhart said:
It isn't something new either -- they were screamers from the day they moved in last May.
It could have started yesterday, it could have been going on for years, but unless you are in that position, you don't know how you would handle it. And, again, you don't know the whole story. There is always more than meets the eye (or ear, in this case).

I'd like to think there won't be a next time, but there probably will and I'm glad to hear you'll call the police when it happens. You may not feel like it's your responsibility, and if they find out you did it, both of them may be upset about it, but in the end it will be a great help to this woman. Good luck.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
672 Posts
Yes call the police. Even if there is no abuse going on they are becoming a nuisance and disturbing the peace if you can hear them screaming that loud. I have the same problem with my downstairs neighbor. Ive been waken up many a weekend by thuds against the walls, slamming doors, and crazy screams. Fortunately the neighbor across from me usually calls the police before I can. The apartments might not let her stay much longer.
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
28,619 Posts
It's probably best for the police to have a record of this. If the verbal abuse then accelerates and becomes physical, they will be more likely to bring charges against him, even if she won't. And, as jonsgirl pointed out, the situation is already a public nuisance! Their rights should end where yours begin!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
917 Posts
on an aside-

i had a friend who was going to college and taking a class on domestic violence. one day she got into a tickle fight with her boyfriend which apparently got very rough, because as she was leaving, police stopped her in her hallway. she explained nothing was going on, just a bit of fun, and they left. just think what would have happened if they'd gone into her apartment and seen books everywhere on domestic violence! :lol:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,908 Posts
Yep- call the police. This is not a fair situation to a newborn baby. The more reports the police have-the better.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,330 Posts
Screaming doesn't make anyone a wifebeater. I'd say MYOB until something happens that makes it your business. Depending on what state you live in, a call to the cops could guarantee someone a trip to jail and a criminal record, quite possbly for nothing. I can understand your concern, I've rented for over 20 years and seen it all. Best policy is to mind your own business until your personal safety or property is infringed upon, not your beliefs.

...cuz the bottom line is, what they do in their apartment or in front of their baby is really none of your business. period. I'm sure I'll catch crap for it, but it's the truth. :twisted:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
202 Posts
I wouldnt call the police...I would inform your apt. manager. I live on the 1st floor of 3 floors in my apt, and I am ALWAYS complaining to the mgr about my upstairs neighbor, doing laundry and vacuming at like 2 -4 in the am. There is always alot of noise and moving stuff around, its sooo annoying. They brought me cookies for Christmas but the noise didnt stop. LOL apts suck!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,564 Posts
I disagree with the MYOB take on this. They made it someone elses business when the shouting reached the next apartment.

Apartment managers often do nothing about stuff like this. They are still getting their money and they don't have to live there, so they don't do much but perhaps give a warning. One of you already said that you complained to you apartment manager many times and it hasn't stopped.

This is certainly something you can call the police about whether there is any physical violence that you are aware of or not.
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
28,619 Posts
Catnip, I understand what you're saying. However, if a neighbor or even a neighbor's dog or party is too loud, it should be reported. People need to be able to sleep.

I lived in a tiny apartment the first two months I was married. Right above us there was a young married couple. He was about 6'1' and 220 pounds and she was about 5' and 100 pounds plus the weight of her eight month pregnancy. I wanted to call the police (This is quite a while ago.) My sister and her husband said to do nothing, because every time the police had been called, she refused to press charges. I heard a thump and a scream, and she was begging him not to hurt the baby. I started up the stairs! (young and dumb) My husband and my sister literally had to pull me off the steps. That's one reason I'm glad the laws have changed.

If it is proved that this sort of thing is going on now, the police will arrest the abuser on the spot, and she is safe--for a little while. Many women put up with this sort of treatment for years, because they are afraid they can't make it on their own financially--especially with children to support--and they love the abuser, or, at least think they do. :(
 
1 - 13 of 13 Posts
Top