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Discussion Starter · #1 ·

Bad picture because she stops staring directly at me when I look at the phone camera.

There is an outdoor cat in my apartment complex that has taken a liking to me (I have determined it is a she). I actually don't stay at my apartment complex very much anymore and live with my mother, so usually I am at my apartment studio only 2 hours a day. On those days, I pet this cat a bit and feed her some kibble before leaving back to my mom's place.

However, sometimes I have an overnight shift at a nearby hospital, and in those situations, I stay for many hours before the shift and sleep at the apartment for 8 hours after the shift. If I see the cat, I let her in to sleep with me and hang around in general, especially on subfreezing days like today. Usually, she just goes to sleep next to me either in bed or next to the computer desk while I'm tinkering around with the internet.

But sometimes she will do the above. Usually, it is when she looks terribly bored and wanders around the studio apt. Unfortunately, my studio is very small and I'm a very austere person in terms of interior decorating. I have a TV on a box, a desk with a laptop, and a bed on the floor. She looks absolutely bored out of her mind, and then she will walk really close to me and stare at me. I always reach down to pet her but she will get up and avoid my hand and reposition herself to stare at me. If I get up, she will follow me and rub her head against my foot and sometimes roll on her back. I will reach down and wiggle my fingers to play with the expected "bear trap," but she will just look away disinterested.

I give her kibble and water until she's had enough, but she still does this. I have bought fish on a pole toys, little fluffy mouse toys, a laser pointer, catnip, catnip in a ball. I have a couple random boxes. I avoid buying too many things because she's not my cat and I can't keep her. I often offer my lap, which sometimes she takes, but not always. She has no interest in anything at all in these situations.

I open the door to let her out, but she will sniff the doorway, look out for a bit, then come back inside. Sometimes, I have to lure her out of the apartment with treats because I don't have a litterbox and I'm afraid of having her go inside, so I will get her outside and then close the door, but she always starts making a mad dash for the door when she realizes what I'm doing. And then even later, sometimes she will come back and headbutt, claw the door and meow before then leaving again. It doesn't seem like she misses outdoor cat life at all.

I can only take so much soulful kitty eyes! What should I do?
 

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One of my strays did this from the day I started feeding her to the day she went on to a new stage in our relationship. It was very puzzling to me, because I was so inexperienced. Then I read on the internet that the sitting right in front of you and staring at you all the time means "I want to be your friend". Nowadays she's gone on to rub against my legs a lot, and only recently, over a year later, she's started to sit next to me. She still doesn't let me touch her. She goes with me on long strolls in the gardens around. What strikes me is that, when I opened the thread and saw the photo, I said "wow, this is Queen Mother!" (that's the name I've given her) So maybe it's a trait of the dominant breed in these cats...?

You're very kind to do what you do for this kitty. Any chance you could have a litter box for those times she spends a long time in your apt.?
 

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My neighbor cat does this to me. He is perfectly happy with playing outside, and his owners let him inside. He has a sister he lives with, and plays with the neighbor hood cats. Since I moved in he has targeted me as a pushover and he practically stalks me! Before I realized he was my neighbor's cat I thought he was a stray (he was a little underweight) and I started feeding him when he begged for food.

Since then he stalks me from room to room in my house staring through windows and crying. He also reaches up and uses his paws to wiggle my doorknob. Worst of all he gets in between my legs when I'm carrying my bags in from my car and scoots into our house to explore.

I love his visits and he's a welcome guest in our yard, but not the house!

The neighbors all laugh and refer to me as the "weak link in the chain" with him :)

I'm not sure what your visitor wants, perhaps she's begging to be adopted? ;)
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
I apologize if I phrased the question the wrong way; I wasn't asking whether or not I should keep her or buy a litter box. I just can't figure out what she wants, if anything at all. I was just illustrating that she has no interest in going outside.

It is a foregone conclusion I cannot have a cat for reasons that make me want to pull my hair out, and there are times where I am not at the apartment for 3 days at a time. There are also reasons why it is not smart for me to have a litter box in the apartment, again for frustrating reasons that better belong in "The complaining thread" in the Lounge. And I do let her back in after half an hour.
 

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I don't think that's accurate. I have 20 cats that I constantly want to know what they want so I can make their lives happier. Three of them I'm able to keep in my apt., 2 I hide in the underground area of the building, 2 I can make very rudimentary shelters for in the public garden downstairs till some cat-hater destroys them and then I build a new one - the rest live in the streets. I love all of them with all my heart and I'm constantly racking my brain trying to figure how to make their lives better with my limited means.
 

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Juventas- what a frustrating situation for you. I think it's pretty obvious that she wants a home indoors, preferably with you. She wants your love and companionship. I don't think there's anything else you can give her, other than a home.

First, I would ask around your apartment complex to see if she belongs to anyone. She could be someone else's cat. You could take her to a vet office and get her scanned for a microchip, to see if she's lost. You can call the vet offices in the area, and the local shelters, to see if anyone has lost a cat matching her description.

If, after all that, she doesn't seem to belong to anyone, I think you should try to find her a home. Since you are unable to adopt her yourself, is there a rescue in the area that you could take her to? Could you ask around to your responsible friends and family members and see if they'd like to adopt a sweet kitty? I don't think she wants to be outdoors anymore. She is obviously wanting to be an indoor pet, IMO.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Thanks for the input. I'm actually fairly certain she has an owner, although I can't really agree with the owner's... inclement weather policy. Don't get me wrong, however, as I don't think she's grossly mistreated. When the weather is good, I try not to interfere, but I know this cat just craves human attention (She is always chasing apartment tenants as I leave in the car and watching to see if they are safe to approach. Most people just ignore her.). I just try to be the best kitty hotel I can be when the weather is bad and it's clear the owner isn't taking her back in. I'd find the owner and give a lecture if I thought it would help but I'm a little jaded when it comes to human-pet relationships.
 
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