Have you considered that he might be redirecting his aggression for having been neutered? You should sit him down and have a long and serious talk with him. Explain that this is not acceptable behavior even for a cat fairy. Unless, of course, you like this behavior in which case.... There are a couple of excellent books by the renowned cat psychiatrist, Dr. Leger Comiskey: "My Cat, My Lover, My Intimate Friend" and "Psycho Kitty." Both of these excellent books deal with the symptom(s) you describe, i.e. catschizophrenia and sexual identity crisis. Another good book of note is by Lilli St. Cyr called "Preparing Your Forearm For The New Baby" which might also come in handy sometime down the road. I remember I had a most difficult time breaking my cat of the habit of perching himself over the toilet and, with newspaper in paw, proceeding to do his business. Remember that cats learn by experience. After he saw me using his catbox for a couple of months, he finally caught on. Cats remember. If the experience is good, they will try to repeat it. Does your cat smoke a cigarette, afterwards? Whatever you don't want your cat to indulge in must never be rewarding or fun, in fact, it must be unpleasant. Have your tried not shaving your forearm and letting the hair grow back in? Petting a wet dog? One common training practice is grabbing the cat, pointing out the wet spot and rubbing his nose in it, then dragging him to the female cat and throwing him on her back. I don't think this is a very good idea. No way to keep peace in the family. Reprimands don't work. Perhaps, he only wants attention; even if it means being hurled across the room. If you want to reform kitty of his bad habit, here's a couple suggestions:
First: Stop all reprimands and punishment. Tell him you want to be taken out to dinner and a movie, first. That you're not jsut some piece of fluff. That you're a catperson. And, like all cat people, you deserve more.
Second: Set kitty up. Get a prosthesis and wire it with standard household current (remember, it's the amps, not the voltage).
Third: Change your body language.
Let's look at these at little more closely, shall we?
1. Stop all reprimands. Concentrate on making your relationship fun, rewarding, playful and interesting not just sexual. Sometimes this change alone will solve your problem. Cats are known to become overly active and destructive when bored. Teach him a new card game. Play more chess with him. Get him to read a book. Daily play charades and give him relaxing massages. That always works for me. Cats that feel neglected will often start using your appendages to gain attention. If you schedule regular therapy sessions which work around his busy schedule and give kitty your constant, undivided attention and play games with him, even sexual dysfunction problems can disappear usually within a fortnight or two.
2. Set kitty up. The most effective method of cat training still remains electro-shock therapy. So the second step is setting up the cat's environment like an insane asylum / operating theater. This will give you the opportunity to try out that new electric train set you got for Christmas and those fancy restraints made out of real Corinthian leather.
3. Change your body language. Instead of shaving your forearm and rubbing it down with lotion, wear a long-sleeve shirt made out of burlap and pet a wet pooch.
If the above-mentioned strategies don't work, you can always go with the old standby and throw him in a cold shower.
I hope I was able to be of some help.
Regards,
Commie
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Related Reading:
Excessive Caterwallering
Nocturnal Emissions
Rambunctiousness on a Shoestring
Littering the Right Box
Training To Scratch Furniture