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Letting Your Cat Sleep On The Bed With You?

7.3K views 47 replies 37 participants last post by  oceanmist  
#1 ·
For the past two years my cat has slept at the bottom of the bed. The first night we got him that's just where he fell asleep and since then that's where he's slept. I was telling someone that for two years now I have slept with my feet out of the side of the bed because my cat takes up the whole of the bottom of the bed. She was completely confused that I would let my cat sleep on my bed. She said her cats are not allowed on her bed or any of her furniture.

Now I can't understand that. Even if I tried to get my cat to stay off the bed it wouldn't work. It's not like he actually listens to me anyway. In fact I feel pretty lucky that he allows me to share the bed with him. I figured most people allowed their cats to sleep anywhere in the house. Now I can't figure out if I'm the weak one for letting my cat walk all over me, or she's just cruel for not allowing her cat on her furniture. I'd love to hear if anyone else has rules for their cat, and how do you get them to listen to you?
 
#2 ·
Lolacola,
You're not "weak", but neither is she "cruel"!!
Cats and owners are all different, in their Perks & Quirks!
What is perfectly fine with one, may not be to another one.
If you've seen her cat, and it seems healthy and happy, doesn't have "issues", and it doesn't hide or run away from her, then it's all good!
You and your cat are happy to share a bed, and that works for both of you!
I have several that share the bed!
Sharon
 
#3 ·
I don't allow my cat in my bedroom. I have allergies and figure I need one cat free area. Other than that the cat sleeps pretty much where ever he wants. He has his own bed that he usues occasionally. He aslo sleeps on the sofa, my recliner, one of the kitchen chairs, on top of his scratching post/climber, and sometimes just in the middle of the living rom floor.
 
#5 ·
Definitely all owners are different! When we got our two, the first rules of mine were no cats on the kitchen bench or table/where we are eating food. So far, one has only tried to jump up a couple of times and he gets a spray with the water bottle. It is also a safety thing actually, he jumped up on the stove once - thank god it was off!!

The other rule is not behind the couch, becuase it is a pretty expensive leather lounge and we don't want it shredded when they try to get back out. They used to sneak down there a lot, but again a squirt with the water bottle or grabbing them before they jump down has seemed to stop them doing it. It is also covered in blakets and doonas until we know we can trust them lol.

We don't really let our cats sleep with us either, especially on work nights, because they disrupt our sleep and decide that 5am is play and pounce time. On weekends we do sometimes for cuddles.

I guess everyone has different rules and preferences, doesn't mean you are weak it's just what works for you. I have opinions about some of the leniencies of other cat owners I know but ultimately it is their choice... so long as they don't try to impose that on our guys when they visit - kind of like parenting I guess?
 
#7 ·
Ha ha! Funny and true. Lily sleeps on top of the washing machine in her bed and we close the door. Lucy sleeps on the half bath floor on a pile of blankets. And we close the door. I don't know what I'm going to do permanently but I don't think I'll have them sleep with me. That part of why there's two of them.

Our last cat slept on my feet. I don't recall her waking me. Maybe I've forgotten because she had been sick for awhile and slept on the kitchen rug for a long time.
 
#8 ·
Somehow, my sister has managed to teach her two cats that they are not allowed on the kitchen counter or the table. I think it may be because the counter tops are granite and very slippery, but I am jealous that for whatever reason, they don't go on her counters. That is the only place it bothers me to have the cats, on the counter while I'm cooking. I usually have to shoo Stephano away about 20 times while I am cooking dinner. Other than that, I don't really care where they go. My teenage daughter sleeps with one of our cats snuggled right up next to her all night. My cat Beep likes to curl up next to us, but only in the winter when it's really cold outside. I love kitties snuggling up next to me. No, you are not crazy, kitties are the best snugglers :)
 
#10 ·
Leelu usually sleeps by my feet. When it's cold, she snuggles closer and if I toss and turn a lot, she leaves and sleeps in her bed. Haha In the morning she'll come up to my face and purr. Great way to wake up.
I wouldn't want it any other way. I change my sheets a lot more often though.
But each to their own, some like it, some don't.
 
#12 ·
Both Kiki and Lulu sleep on the bed. Lulu gets into the crook behind my knees or if I am alseep on my back she sleeps between the knees, although she quickly moves onto the same place with my husband as she gets a better cover from the AC. Kiki is at the base or on my pillow and if I move in the night she purrs me back to sleep. Very occaisional nights they sleep in the living room.
Our only sule has been no scratching on our furniture which they are fine with. I figured when we are not at home they are all over the counters and dining table anyway, so we clean the counters before any food prep. Except for Kiki getting into our glass bowl on the dining table to sleep ( because of course there IS nowehere else)they don't jump up anywhere, except to lay on their blankets on the sofa. Mainly because I am not worried about it and neither is my husband and we don't have allergies. Each cat and each person has their own preferences
 
#13 · (Edited)
With my first two cats we were very strict. They can be on my furniture but only on my lap and never on the tables or counters. We got them both together, so they would sleep together in their own bed. Angel was so tiny when we got her and all alone that I took her to bed with me where she snuggled against my neck all night.
You can teach your cats pretty much anything, but you have to start early and you have to be consistent.
Femmy will sleep on the bed only when she's cold and exactly like I taught her. Right on top of me and as soon as anyone moves she'll jump off. Angel on the other hand, sleapt in the bed, under the covers, with two people her whole life so she just moves around a bit when you turn over and then goes right back to sleep. Her favourite spot is behind my bum where the covers form a little tent. Now the not so funny bit is when they are both on the bed at the same time. Me on my side with Angel behind my bum and Femmy on top of my hip.
 
#14 ·
When we took in our cat Annie as a stray, she was so grateful all she wanted to do was sleep by my head or even better, ON my head. After repeatedly moving her to my feet she finally got the message and stayed there during the night. We LOVE our cats on our bed, on our chairs and just about anywhere they want to lay around but totally get someone that would not want them in the bedroom. Not on ANY of the furniture?, that seems a bit much.
 
#19 ·
I don't let my cats sleep in my bed - they let me sleep in their bed. Lol.



Get a dog. :wink
Ha! Good one Heather!
A guy came in to the shelter recently wanting a cat. I asked my initial probing question about what he was looking for in a cat, "one that listens to me" he said. :?

After a moment of trying to determine if he was serious or not, I told him to get a dog. Never saw him again. :p
 
#20 ·
Yeah... kinda this for me too. The boys go on the counters.. table... couches... beds.... bookshelves... wherever. The only time I shoo them off is if there is danger involved.

For example the big boys know to stay on the bar section while I cook so they are allowed. Neelix hasn't learned to stay behind that imaginary line so he gets put onto the floor each time he crosses it (which is a bazillion times per night) because there are knives and hot burners and stuff out and about (not to mention of course the hygiene of him tramping across my prep area).

MowMow sleeps curled up against/under my cheek. Book usually starts at the end of the bed but once it cools down outside he moves up to the body pillow I sleep against. He lays on it and drapes a back leg over me. If it's REALLY cold he lays on the arm that's stretched out from under the covers.

I've started a hunt for a new mattress and I wanted to go from a King size to a full size but... I think I'll have to compromise on a queen or we won't all fit in the bed..

I admit now that there are 3 of them i'm thinking we need to do some rearranging and make some changes. Right now it's feeling a bit like a free for all...all the time...
 
#17 ·
We had 3 cats many years ago and they never were up on counters or tables. They were allowed on furniture though. Then we got the 2 we have now. I tried everything to keep them off counters and tables. The advice I was given was that if I wanted pets that didn't jump up, to get a dog!!!

Some cats are "up" cats and some are "down" cats. Our 2 that we have now are up cats for sure. So we go with the flow.

Abby will only sleep on top of the covers and gets down if either of us moves...she usually comes back later. Gizmo sleeps under the cover as close to me as he can get...our Velcro cat :)
 
#18 ·
Gizmo used to sleep against my legs or near my head, Eboney is still finding her place in the house and has slept in loads of different places so far.

She spent last night laid at the side of my pillow near my face.

No furniture restrictions in my house (although I totally understand why people have them) She can go/sleep wherever she chooses as long as she stays off of the counters I'm not bothered.
 
#21 ·
Our cats go wherever they want, whenever they want. The only time they get shooed off of anything is if they're on the counters when we're preparing food, or on the table when we're eating--and even then, no one bothers to make them get down off the table during meal times unless everyone is sitting down together for an "official" meal. Subsequently, we inadvertently ingest a lot of cat hair. I linked a video in another thread last week, which is also quite appropriate here.

Emily @dt8thd | Websta (Webstagram)

The table that's covered in cats? Yeah, that's where we eat. :roll:

As far as sleeping arrangements are concerned, any cat that wants to sleep on my bed is more than welcome--heck, it's encouraged. Choco-cat and Poe sleep with me every night.
 
#23 ·
We had set a rule that we would never let our cat sleep in the bedroom as my SO has allergies (we have Orientals so they're less allergenic, but still). That was kiboshed about 3 weeks into owning Puccini and we decided just to train him to sleep all night, so he cuddled with us on the bed. He hates being woken up, so in the night if we roll over we'll sometimes get a hiss or a yell but we're used to that now.

When we got our second Oriental they preferred to sleep together. Sometimes they're on the bed but usually they're downstairs on the couch. We did have to shut the door on them a few times as they preferred playing to cuddling at night but they're used to our schedule now.
 
#24 ·
Sheiladoreen, I have pretty bad allergies to the cats. Have you tried an air purifier in the bedroom? I have one and I turn it on as soon as I get home from work then close (I use a big lava rock to keep the door cracked for the boys to get in and out) the door most of the way shut. It really helps!!

In fact last night I had shut the door, MowMOw was on a rampage to find Book (who now takes refuge on my face at night). I locked Mow out and Book in and went to bed. The air purifier was on high. When I opened the door and walked out of the room this morning I was attacked by some serous allergy action. I guess spending all night in my air purified room did NOT prepare me for the rest of the apartment this morning.
 
#25 ·
Sheiladoreen, I have pretty bad allergies to the cats. Have you tried an air purifier in the bedroom?
My SO is actually okay! With each cat he had about a 2-week adjustment period with some sniffles. And he'll have a red/itchy/swelling reaction if he gets scratched from playing rough with the cats, but otherwise he is fine. Our cats are fairly "hypoallergenic" despite that being a term widely applied to cats by breeders looking to sell. We've had friends with cat allergies stay over in the "cat room" without reactions. :)
 
#28 ·
THIS!!

I had abandonment issues when we got our second cat. To my SO I kept saying, "He doesn't love us anymore! He's upset we got a second cat! He likes the new cat more than us!"

I'm used to it now (and glad they get along so well!) but it is always nice to have a warm kitty to snuggle with -- and knowing they chose you!
 
#29 ·
Mocha slept every single night either right beside me curled onto my arm OR right between my legs at the end of the bed OR right beside me and under to top blanket. It even became part of our bedtime routine...I'd get in, thump the bed twice, and she'd come....I really miss that with her.

My childhood cat, Berz, slept beside me whenever he was inside. In fact, many nights, he would jump onto the window sill outside my window and scratch to be let in to sleep on the bed!

Now, if I let these three kittens in my bed, I will willingly admit myself to a psychiatric facility! They would fight and play and be kittens all night long. Nope...they have their very own human bed in their very own rooms...with no human to have to share it with....works fine for me! Close my door and I get to sleep in peace!
 
#30 ·
Emily will go to sleep on a chair in a room next to our bedroom. A few hours later she will wake us up for an early morning feeding. After I feed her she most always will come back to the bed and sleep next to us until we get up.

It seems she likes to be near us at night, either nearby in the next room or on the bed itself. She is very quiet and we only know she is on the bed and wants her wet food because she walks on us. In the winter she snuggles closer to us and in the summer will stay at the end of the bed.